Please or to access all these features

What we're reading

Find your new favourite book or recommend one on our Book forum.

I just read a terrible book

687 replies

Orangeis · 06/02/2023 11:29

Bring me back, B A Paris.

What a load of absolute tosh. A man's partner dissapears, 6 years later he gets with her sister and lives with her. The big twist is.....the new girlfriend is actually the missing sister. He didn't realise this as she had a different hair do.
That's hours of my life I'll never get back. I feel like taking the book in to the back garden and burning the bugger.
What's your worst book and why?

OP posts:
Alcemeg · 08/02/2023 12:47

people slamming a magazine into a weapon

Just shows what an ignoramus I am about all things military, I was trying to picture some sort of magic trick with a rolled-up Good Housekeeping transforming into a sword.

Brefugee · 08/02/2023 12:45

I was forgiving a lot in really trashy book and then we got to potatoes in a 14 century Scottish kitchen - and that was apparently was my line.

oh god, one of my lines (depending on mood) is people slamming a magazine into a weapon. Better still, making a big deal about having "one up the spout" jamming in a new full magazine then chucking the weapon on the floor (drops it, it gets knocked out of their hand, chucking it over to someone...)

Or bad radio procedure. Military people saying "repeat" over a radio get me actually frothing

ReneBumsWombats · 08/02/2023 12:30

the awkward sex scene in Number 9 Dream, which knocks Molly Bloom's and yes I said yes I will Yes into a cocked hat

It's even more bizarre than that? I'm no prude, but she really is into some weird stuff.

xJoy · 08/02/2023 12:19

It's funny and true! Even 2 hundred years later it would be a little awkward to date somebody from work who was there in the capacity of maintenance or security or something. Don't care if I sound a bitch, I know it would be perceived as omg kind of gossip. Not saying I would never do it and tbh the awkwardness goes if you know each other and are certain it's worth it/going to last.
But 2 hundred years ago no woman was this brave, she couldn't afford to be. Gossip could destroy her.

Alcemeg · 08/02/2023 11:59

I'm as gullible as a medieval peasant when watching movies (I don't watch telly); as long as the story engages, I'm open to all kinds of manipulation.

One film that jarred even with me, though, was Titanic. Yeah, sure, she would be below decks shagging him and prancing around without a thought for honour or reputation or - let's face it - contraception. The worst bit is when they're having sex in a car and she gives the finger to someone through the steamed-up windows. I half expected her to start blowing bubble gum and offering him a spliff.

Back to books: David Mitchell got a bit of a pasting upthread, but I think he's worth reading for his moments of utter brilliance... like the character of Timothy Cavendish in Cloud Atlas, or the awkward sex scene in Number 9 Dream, which knocks Molly Bloom's and yes I said yes I will Yes into a cocked hat.

GloomyDarkness · 08/02/2023 11:48

My mum would leave the room if we had a war film, or other military type things, on because me (was in the Army) and my dad (career soldier) used to critique everything.

This is a whole popular thing on YouTube.

Generally with books and films I do suspend a lot of belief - but occasionally something jars so much it just throws you out it - I was forgiving a lot in really trashy book and then we got to potatoes in a 14 century Scottish kitchen - and that was apparently was my line.

PermanentTemporary · 08/02/2023 11:28

I guess we all have areas of inaccuracy that bother us more than others. Eg the west wing is a total fantasy but to me very watchable. It's interesting that it's quite dated in its attitudes now, being 20 years old and written really about the 90s. It would be odd seeing it remade now while still trying to be about the 90s, the mental furniture would be wrong.

It has to be said I don't watch all that much telly - some documentaries, some movies, bit of reality TV/gameshows - and I like reading books that were written at the time they're about, or nonfiction.

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 11:23

Kanaloa · 08/02/2023 11:04

But surely even watching a police drama you think ‘hmm that fbi agent didn’t even read the suspect his rights’ or ‘hey Luther could never get this case through because he evidence tampered!’

Why do you think people who watch a period piece are stupid or don’t know anything but you don’t think you’re stupid/ignorant for not knowing that of course doctors aren’t all shagging in the on call room in between heart bypasses that take about 5 minutes?

I didn’t say stupid! 🤔

i have squat all idea about the internal workings of the FBI or hospitals so I can generally just enjoy whereas historical fiction i find myself constantly thinking “oh as if?” “That would NEVER have happened” “what did she just say???” “Oh come on!!” 😂

80s · 08/02/2023 11:22

I agree that it isn't about being "up to speed with what’s historically accurate" - I'm happy to watch Downton despite knowing a lot of it is a load of cobblers. I think there are two aspects: 1. whether you are supposed to think that it's realistic and 2. whether you have detailed knowledge about it so find it hard to overlook. In the case of Jojo Rabbit, for example, although it's meant to be saying something serious about real things, there's enough fantasy in it that it doesn't feel like they're trying to con you when they add nonsense. But because I have detailed knowledge about Germany, the nonsense was so annoying to me that I couldn't ignore it, even though I wanted to. Whereas with Downton, spotting the nonsense is part of the fun, if anything: I have no skin in that game.

Kanaloa · 08/02/2023 11:04

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:54

Any fiction where I don’t know more about the truth

So… medical dramas, police dramas, drug gang cartels 😂 … I could go on and on re what fiction stuff I love to watch

But surely even watching a police drama you think ‘hmm that fbi agent didn’t even read the suspect his rights’ or ‘hey Luther could never get this case through because he evidence tampered!’

Why do you think people who watch a period piece are stupid or don’t know anything but you don’t think you’re stupid/ignorant for not knowing that of course doctors aren’t all shagging in the on call room in between heart bypasses that take about 5 minutes?

ReneBumsWombats · 08/02/2023 10:57

I absolutely accept that people in historical novels won't speak accurately. That's necessary to allow us to engage with the story as if we were contemporaries. That's why I don't mind, for example, when they cast a Catherine Parr who's much older than the real one was, in order to make us respond to her in the same way her contemporaries would have. Or change the dresses a bit so that we realise Anne Boleyn was wearing clothes that were considered sexier and more exotic than standard.

But they need to do it smoothly and in a way that doesn't shatter the illusion. A Tudor courtier using the word "numpty" is too much. The Famous Five saying, "You bet!" is ridiculous (I realise that's not Blyton's original).

I never watch hospital dramas with doctors because they make it unbearable!

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:57

80s · 08/02/2023 10:56

So what do you watch? If you can’t tolerate any fiction that isn’t accurate to true life what do you actually watch on television? Or what do you read?
Ooops, that was meant to be a quote above. Was going to answer the same as Whatislove - I'm happy to read anything that fools me into feeling like it's real!

And that’s great.

I love medical etc dramas because I don’t have to suspend my belief, I can enjoy not knowing loads of it is bull shit!

80s · 08/02/2023 10:56

So what do you watch? If you can’t tolerate any fiction that isn’t accurate to true life what do you actually watch on television? Or what do you read?
Ooops, that was meant to be a quote above. Was going to answer the same as Whatislove - I'm happy to read anything that fools me into feeling like it's real!

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:55

This reply has been deleted

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Medical dramas
Police drama
Crime dramas
Military dramas

I could go on

Brefugee · 08/02/2023 10:54

I'm reading One Pair of Feet by Monica Dickens which was published shortly after the war. That is an eye-opener in terms of attitude, for sure.

80s · 08/02/2023 10:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:54

Kanaloa · 08/02/2023 10:52

So what do you watch? If you can’t tolerate any fiction that isn’t accurate to true life what do you actually watch on television? Or what do you read?

Any fiction where I don’t know more about the truth

So… medical dramas, police dramas, drug gang cartels 😂 … I could go on and on re what fiction stuff I love to watch

Brefugee · 08/02/2023 10:53

Anyone watching downtown or reading Mills and boon type historical romances - I doubt would be too up to speed with what’s historically accurate or not anyway?

meh. I watch because i like the stories, and i am very interested in Art Deco and the fashions. But it does jar that they are ok with some things, and the dialogue (i remember Matthew talking about a "steep learning curve") is idiotic. Definitely a suspension of at least some disbelief required.

My mum would leave the room if we had a war film, or other military type things, on because me (was in the Army) and my dad (career soldier) used to critique everything.

80s · 08/02/2023 10:52

I enjoyed watching Jojo Rabbit to some extent, but parts of it were so American (just not what things were like in Germany) that I left feeling mildly annoyed overall. Sometimes an error is just so stupid that it throws you out of the story.

Kanaloa · 08/02/2023 10:52

So what do you watch? If you can’t tolerate any fiction that isn’t accurate to true life what do you actually watch on television? Or what do you read?

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:41

But generally if you can see it

then unless happy to completely suspend belief

it does make it difficult for many of us to enjoy!

Kanaloa · 08/02/2023 10:40

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 08:04

Anyone watching downtown or reading Mills and boon type historical romances - I doubt would be too up to speed with what’s historically accurate or not anyway?

I think people can comprehend that a programme is not historically accurate and still enjoy it. I actually think it shows more stupidity to have no understanding that some of us can separate fiction and reality.

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:02

In the same way - my very doctor heavy family never watched casualty because they said it was so factually inaccurate

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 10:00

TheMarzipanDildo · 08/02/2023 09:58

Why ever not?

Because if you did, then the programme seems rather farcical

TheMarzipanDildo · 08/02/2023 09:58

Whatislove82 · 08/02/2023 08:04

Anyone watching downtown or reading Mills and boon type historical romances - I doubt would be too up to speed with what’s historically accurate or not anyway?

Why ever not?

Swipe left for the next trending thread