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Original poster

bad sex awards: how about childbirth?

259 replies

Elasticwoman · 28/11/2007 16:55

Article in the Times touched on the literary award for bad sex in a novel. I wondered whether any one has any contributions for a literary bad birth in a novel?

Can't think of any toe curlingly embarrassing childbirth in fiction myself, but a funny one in Adrian Mole, when Adrian witnesses the birth because the nurses mistakenly thought he was the baby's father, so we see the birth through his eyes and then the fun of the nurses' horror when they realised who he was! (Thanks Sue Townsend - a memorable scene.)

OP posts:
UnquietDad · 30/11/2007 12:30

I don't climb, no....

norkmaiden · 30/11/2007 12:30

Not in a book exactly, but Sylvia Plath's description of giving birth to her son is the best description I've ever read, and done with a lovely light touch. It's either in her journals or letter, can't remember which.

Swedes2Turnips1 · 30/11/2007 12:26

UQD - Are you a keen climber?
Are we playing 20 questions?

Dinosaur · 30/11/2007 12:11

I haven't read any of his books, which is a poor show as his children attend the same school as mine (actually I didn't put two and two together and work out who he was until quite recently).

UnquietDad · 30/11/2007 12:09

I'm not Dave but I did enjoy "Dad's Life"!

Dinosaur · 30/11/2007 11:15

I didn't know Unquiet Dad was an author.

No idea who you are though. It doesn't sound as if you have enough children to be Dave Hill (ponders)...

MerryAnnSinglemas · 30/11/2007 11:11

glad you liked it Vulgar ! I must re read it

Kathyis6incheshigh · 30/11/2007 11:04

What about Helen Simpson? Isn't one of her short stories a childbirth opera?

Vulgar · 30/11/2007 11:01

I've just read the L-shaped room after MerryAnnSinglemas recommended it on Mumsnet.

And even though it is only a few weeks since i read it, I can't remember much about it either. I think it was quite a small part of the book. Strange, as the pregnancy was quite detailed.

Great book, must read the other 2 in the series.

OrmIrian · 30/11/2007 10:36

I can't recall a single birth scene in a book. Many from TV. I really can't. Are there loads ? Maybe I've just erased them from my memory as they are sooo bad ?

MerryAnnSinglemas · 30/11/2007 10:30

can't remember the birth bit in L Shaped Room (love that book)

Kathyis6incheshigh · 30/11/2007 09:58

Does The L-Shaped Room have one? Given that the whole story is about an unmarried pregnancy it might make sense for her to actually have the baby as well.

Original poster
Elasticwoman · 29/11/2007 19:02

What do you mean, is that why I'm called Elasticwoman? No i didn't keep my tights on!
Kathy6" I don't remember any pushing and panting in Tristram Shandy, but i did fall asleep a lot in that one.

Oh I've just thought. The Millstone by Margaret Drabble. That had a childbirth scene. Made childbirth seem rather easy and something that went on in the background while the heroine was busy describing her surroundings. And i used to be such a fan of MD.

OP posts:
kittock · 29/11/2007 17:41

That must have been it Swedes. Damn - knew I should have signed up for those Jedi ante-natal classes.

Swedes2Turnips1 · 29/11/2007 16:59

Kittock - I wonder if she felt the force as opposed to pushing.

kittock · 29/11/2007 16:55

Luke and Leia's births in the last Star Wars film was a lot less messy than I remember childbirth being. Their mother was all dressed in white in a white room. She lay on a table, made a funny face, and out they popped.

She did die afterwards though.

Swedes2Turnips1 · 29/11/2007 16:16

UQD - Yes, sorry was not concentrating.

UnquietDad · 29/11/2007 15:10

Did you mean to put that on the Random Facts thread, Swedes?

Swedes2Turnips1 · 29/11/2007 15:09

sorry wrong thread

Swedes2Turnips1 · 29/11/2007 15:08

In the 22 James Bond movies, Bond has 23 vodka martinis, 6 of which he orders himself but two of those he never receives.

Do I get to join the band of people on this thread that noone would want to go for a drink with?

MerryAnnSinglemas · 29/11/2007 12:54

swedes !!

Swedes2Turnips1 · 29/11/2007 12:52

A manifestation of UQD (said quickly) sounds like something they might treat at a GUM clinic.

MerryAnnSinglemas · 29/11/2007 12:46

elasticwoman - no I'm not a manifestation of UQD (you asked earlier!)

Kathyis6incheshigh · 29/11/2007 11:47

I doubt they'll remember this thread. They'll be too busy laughing at the very funny bits and admiring the description
Anyway, it's not like it's the only thing that happens - it's quite an eventful book.

UnquietDad · 29/11/2007 10:54

Well, when all the hints are given, yes. But they don't start to be given until quite late on.

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