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Original poster

bad sex awards: how about childbirth?

259 replies

Elasticwoman · 28/11/2007 16:55

Article in the Times touched on the literary award for bad sex in a novel. I wondered whether any one has any contributions for a literary bad birth in a novel?

Can't think of any toe curlingly embarrassing childbirth in fiction myself, but a funny one in Adrian Mole, when Adrian witnesses the birth because the nurses mistakenly thought he was the baby's father, so we see the birth through his eyes and then the fun of the nurses' horror when they realised who he was! (Thanks Sue Townsend - a memorable scene.)

OP posts:
Swedes2Turnips1 · 05/12/2007 13:42

V-S I confess I have never used the word labia, ever. I just didn't want to sound too provincial. Anyway, what is a labia?

UnquietDad · 05/12/2007 13:37

sfxmum - the Virgin ones?....

UnquietDad · 05/12/2007 13:37

Don't worry, katepol, I knew what you meant!
And yes, to an extent, is the answer.

VictorianSqualor · 05/12/2007 13:36

Does MNHQ know who you are???
They should sneak one of your books into the book club.

sfxmum · 05/12/2007 13:34

after lurking about yesterday this was costing me some sleep and then woke up at about 3 am and I knew
hate being obsessive

dh has a couple of your books btw

katepol · 05/12/2007 13:31

Oh G-d! I meant the childbirth scene, not the sex scene, with reference to your dp UQD
I'll get my coat...

VS and S2T1, I too have never had cause to use the word labia either, although my dp has quite an extensive vocabularly in that area...

Kathyis6incheshigh · 05/12/2007 13:27

I suppose the singular is labium.
Or is it labia (sing), labiae (pl)?

VictorianSqualor · 05/12/2007 13:25

I don't think I've used the word Labia ever.

Swedes2Turnips1 · 05/12/2007 13:17

I can't ever remember using the word labia during sex. Do you think I might have issues?

katepol · 05/12/2007 13:15

I do hope so. A well written sex scene is a delight. A poorly written one tends to make me completely lose empathy with the characters, as I suspect a poorly written childbirth scene would too.
Did your scene have any basis in your DP's experiences btw?

UnquietDad · 05/12/2007 13:10

There are a couple of juicy sex scenes, and they are smoking hot, even if I do say so myself.

UnquietDad · 05/12/2007 13:09

Ker-CHING!
Excuse me, I turned into Mika for a second.

katepol · 05/12/2007 13:06

UQD - I went to Borders today to browse your book, and have since added it to my Amazon wish list . I look forward to reading it (and critiquing the childirth scene). I also happened to turn to a page where I saw the word labia - so I expect I will be critiquing a sex scene too? lol!

UnquietDad · 05/12/2007 11:44

Transvision Vamp and many others! ha ha
The childbirth bit is in the new one with the The The song title.

VictorianSqualor · 05/12/2007 10:37

Hahaha, my email address is on here somewhere Lionheart, it really isn't that hard though!!!

onebatmother · 04/12/2007 21:47

thingy = subject

query 'could a sentence' repl. 'could be a sentence'

onebatmother · 04/12/2007 21:45

So, IS anyone for a c w thread, in about three month's time, with childbirth as it's first thingy.

Could a sentence, a para or a few paras.

those too embarrassed/busy (others) or crap at it (me) to come up with actual creative writing could post passages they admire and say why in a little bit of detail. By that I mean mentioning specific phrases and their effects rather than 'I like it, it is good.'

lionheart · 04/12/2007 20:50

There is a CAT somewhere with my name on it (thanks Kathy, I do hope it comes).

VS, my sweet.

onebatmother · 04/12/2007 20:46

oh lionheart I looked pleadingly at VS. give it a go.

onebatmother · 04/12/2007 20:45
lionheart · 04/12/2007 20:45
onebatmother · 04/12/2007 20:42

reeeeeeeeeking even

onebatmother · 04/12/2007 20:41
katepol · 04/12/2007 20:31

Aha! I think I have it

Are you a Transvision Vamp fan UQD by any chance?

Which book has the childbirth scene in - the one published this Sept?

Original poster
Elasticwoman · 04/12/2007 20:28

The excitement this thread has generated for your UQD makes me wonder just how grateful you can be to me for stirring it all up!

How's about a free copy of the one with the childbirth scene in it?

Or you could offer me a job as your Marketing/Publicity assistant.

(Gizajob! I can do that!)

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