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Original poster

bad sex awards: how about childbirth?

259 replies

Elasticwoman · 28/11/2007 16:55

Article in the Times touched on the literary award for bad sex in a novel. I wondered whether any one has any contributions for a literary bad birth in a novel?

Can't think of any toe curlingly embarrassing childbirth in fiction myself, but a funny one in Adrian Mole, when Adrian witnesses the birth because the nurses mistakenly thought he was the baby's father, so we see the birth through his eyes and then the fun of the nurses' horror when they realised who he was! (Thanks Sue Townsend - a memorable scene.)

OP posts:
Kathyis6incheshigh · 29/11/2007 10:45

It's obvious it's going to though, isn't it? I had worked it out, anyway.

UnquietDad · 29/11/2007 10:19

But when they find out.... they may remember!

Kathyis6incheshigh · 29/11/2007 09:55

Well if no-one knows which book it is, it doesn't matter how many plot twists I give away, does it?

UnquietDad · 28/11/2007 23:02

I am torn, because this place would probably be such a good marketing opportunity ... but people rarely blow their cover here, and that's the way it should be.

UnquietDad · 28/11/2007 22:24

Kathy - I was referring to the birth scene on the day of Princess Diana's death, not that one. But thanks for giving away a plot twist!!

LazyLinePainterJane · 28/11/2007 21:39

I want to read UQD's book

*goes searching...

Swedes2Turnips1 · 28/11/2007 21:10

Is that why you are called elasticwoman?

Original poster
Elasticwoman · 28/11/2007 21:09

I thought it was her tights Daphne kept on.
Swede, childbirth on tv is a whole new ball game. It rarely takes more than a couple of pushes. Even when I saw the Real Thing on tv I thought it wasn't realistic because it wasn't like my experience. Then I had another baby and realised that it can vary a lot.

OP posts:
Swedes2Turnips1 · 28/11/2007 20:57

I didn't know Australian humans were marsupials as well.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 28/11/2007 20:52

That's nothing. Daphne in Neighbours kept her dungarees on.

coby · 28/11/2007 20:51

swedes - pmsl (lots) - that was back in the days when TV was proper entertainment

Swedes2Turnips1 · 28/11/2007 20:42
Swedes2Turnips1 · 28/11/2007 20:40

I remember that in either Dallas or Dynasty, on of the actresses kept her knickers on during a giving birth scene. I knew it wasn't realistic because she wasn't reading Grazia at the same time.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 28/11/2007 20:17

Of course - Tristram Shandy!

Original poster
Elasticwoman · 28/11/2007 19:51

Cold Comfort Farm has more about preventing what happens when the sukebind starts the sap rising etc.

Poor Fanny Robin has to walk up a steep hill in labour to the almshouse to have her baby in Far From the Madding Crowd and there are not good health outcomes for either of them.

Erica Jong does a birth scene in Parachutes & Kisses. Not quite as earthy as her sex scenes.

OP posts:
themildmanneredjanitor · 28/11/2007 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 28/11/2007 19:42

Have replied TMMJ!

themildmanneredjanitor · 28/11/2007 19:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lionheart · 28/11/2007 19:31

Don't have that on tape I suppose?

lionheart · 28/11/2007 19:27

Kate Chopin, The Awakening, I think but it isn't bad in the sense of the OP.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 28/11/2007 19:19

Of course, Cold Comfort Farm has some good discussion of the issue - don't have my copy here though.

lionheart · 28/11/2007 19:18

The birth near the beginning of The Color Purple certainly has an impact.

Kathyis6incheshigh · 28/11/2007 19:18

There is a play by Bill Naughton called June Evening in which one of the characters has to give birth on stage. I was in an am dram group that did this in our local church hall when I was 17 - in fact, I was the unfortunate one who had to have the baby.

Everybody in the audience PTSL because it wad so quick. Then when the baby appeared the whole hall completely erupted in hysterics because it was so obviously a Tiny Tears.

lionheart · 28/11/2007 19:17

Someone spill.

Vulgar · 28/11/2007 19:16

Julie Myerson wrote a really good one in one of her books.

such a shame I can't remember what it was called.

she's quite good on birth and pregnancy I think.

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