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Original poster

Are there key words on the jacket that puts you OFF a book?

189 replies

sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 15:58

Me?

As soon as I read the words 'Cornwall' or 'Painter' or 'tea shop' or 'young mother'
I immediately Put The Book Back.

Why do a lot of female authors set their story in Cornwall? It's so boring and predictable.

OP posts:
tipsyloolah · 07/09/2014 16:37

Uplifting.
Hilarious.
Heartwarming.

Flashbacks.
Twins.
Colonial anything.

Twirly writing.
Puns.

Quotes saying 'if you liked x, you'll love this . . .' or 'for fans of . . .' If you tell me it's the new Sarah Waters, that just reminds me to read Sarah Waters.

Anything that starts 'when A discovers B, little does she know . . .'

I can't remember the last time I read anything new and good Sad.

Takver · 07/09/2014 16:33

Glad it's not just me, *sweetnesandlite' Grin

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:33

............you have called one of those urchins Cressida.

That's one to look out for! :)

OP posts:
Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:31

'Booker Prize Winner'

Instant put back

Even though they are well-written and usually immensely clever, they are hardly entertaining!

OP posts:
NerfHerder · 07/09/2014 16:30

Martin Amis
Paul Auster

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:30

Juggling career and children"

Instant turn-off! And then they usually up sticks and move to Cornwall to become Painters and open Tea Shops.

OP posts:
Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:26

And if the book has GLITTER on the front what's with that? then I immediately put it back.

OP posts:
GameOfScones · 07/09/2014 16:26

There are some very good books set in Ireland, books I enjoy and would read again. The Commitments, various books by Mary Stanley. Some of Marian Keyes (although not the one she keeps saying "fissog" in, they should have written "fissog" on the cover and then I'd not have bought it) Grin

But if you've set those books in the fifties and peopled them with urchins in hand-knitted war-refugee jumpers then I don't want to know about it. Especially if they spend their time hiding under the table from some drunken relative or the nuns and have taken keeping what money they do scrape together in the teapot for good luck until somebody spends it on gin.

And especially, especially but unlikely if you have called one of those urchins Cressida. I don't know why anybody would name a person, even a fictional person, after a pointless salad ingredient nobody likes and still expect people to read their book. No. Just, no.

NickiFury · 07/09/2014 16:25

"Juggling career and children"

invariably a nonsensical tale of an uber successful, middle class London dweller making farcical errors at work and home, yet still managing to hold down her job and get her suave boss to have the hots for her at the same time. All the while supported by her one dimensional long suffering husband who holds it all together.

Bore off!

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:25

Saga (yawn)
ditto Victorian Style.

Lifesalemon,
I'm the same with some really modern American Fiction, but I prefer to read American Classics than British ones.
You can't beat John Steinbeck, Mark Twain.

And Willaim Styrone, Stephen King (and Bill Bryson)? All great American authors.

OP posts:
YorkshireTeaGold · 07/09/2014 16:25

5* grazia
Louise bagshaw
"Sammy (a klutz who loves shoes!) is trying to get over her relationship by taking a job in the country by working for a grumpy (but well hung) farmer"... I wonder how that one will end.

Primadonnagirl · 07/09/2014 16:24

If the plot is abou somone who finds a letter etc from the past and so travels to Egypt, Japan etc to " unravel the secrets of the past" As you do.
The book jacket of my life story reads " on day Prima discovers a note revealing secrets from her past..it is a Marks and Spencer's receipt for that top she bought but made her arms look fat."

geekaMaxima · 07/09/2014 16:22

One woman's struggle...

Harrowing

Quintessentially British

Any character described as loving fun, shopping, or shoes

Takver · 07/09/2014 16:22

'Booker Prize Winner'

Krakken · 07/09/2014 16:21

Saga
Spanning across 3 generations

Those kind of books are just prolonged dullness.

PicandMinx · 07/09/2014 16:21

Quest
Code
Lengthy
Victorian style
Saga
Now a film!

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 07/09/2014 16:21

Another literary masterpiece - usually means it is by Ian McEwan and therefore shite.

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:19

Annoying character names are top of the list as well.
Is it really necessary to have an Alan, Alana, Alaine and Aleysha in the same story?
There's nothing worse than having to constantly backtrack to try and remember 'who's who'.
Authors - Please make your names Different.

OP posts:
MrsDavidBowie · 07/09/2014 16:19

I would definitely read a harrowing disturbing book set in America Grin

Grammar · 07/09/2014 16:19

' Richard and Judy book choice'

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:18

GameofScones, one of the best holidays I had was in Ireland. I love the place.
But, I can't stand reading about it! Confused

OP posts:
RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 07/09/2014 16:18

Beautiful
Evocative
Intoxicating
Haunting

Usually means they attempt poetic language but have probably never heard of a semi colon and can't punctuate to save their lives.

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 16:17

Is there a book called Planet Zurg? Shock

OP posts:
Lifesalemon · 07/09/2014 16:17

I don't like books set in America, I don't know why, but I don't even give them a chance. So for me its when i read the words, New York, Chicago etc. on the jacket. Sometimes I've downloaded a book and not realised its set in america until the character mentions the 'mall' or the 'sidewalk' etc a few pages in and then I very rarely read any further.

GameOfScones · 07/09/2014 16:17

"Irish childhood" has me wanting to throw the book as far away from me as I can possibly get it. Especially if it's set in the 1950s and has photographs as the cover art. Angela and her Ashes hold no interest for me.

Annoying character names. Cressida in particular.

Anything talking about 'no greater love' etc.