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Original poster

Are there key words on the jacket that puts you OFF a book?

189 replies

sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 15:58

Me?

As soon as I read the words 'Cornwall' or 'Painter' or 'tea shop' or 'young mother'
I immediately Put The Book Back.

Why do a lot of female authors set their story in Cornwall? It's so boring and predictable.

OP posts:
Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:53

The only Laugh Out Loud book I've read was a Ben Elton one. I think it was a pisstake on Big Brother it WAS funny

OP posts:
RonaldMcDonald · 07/09/2014 17:53

heartwarming

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 07/09/2014 17:52

A laugh out loud comedy. I have never laughed out loud at a book.
Dan Brown.
Choc lit-dunno what it is, but I know I won't like it.

ThatBloodyWoman · 07/09/2014 17:51

Dystopia, zombie and elf are definite draws for me!

DisgruntledAardvark · 07/09/2014 17:50

The second I come across an elf in a book I put the book down and back away slowly.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 07/09/2014 17:49

I'm glad you mentioned "family secrets" - it's invariably something horribly upsetting about incest and/or child abuse that I'd far rather not have bothered to read 289 pages to get to. Somehow it's never a secret like "your great great cousin Eugenia discovered the theory of relativity first and Einstein did her in to claim the credit."

The one word that switches me off, though, is "wistful". Wistful! FFS, do I have to sit in a bow window reading in while wearing an artful headscarf whilst mournfully contemplating the past?

DisgruntledAardvark · 07/09/2014 17:49

I suppose female get together books are the literary equivalent of male get together films (like The Hangover). There's usually a wacky older relative who might say something a bit outrageous every now and then.

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:48

siterofmercy,

Zombies work well in films (or tv series) Not so much in books.

Except Romero's Night of the Living Dead. Now he got it right.

OP posts:
Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:46

Do you think that Fiction has lost it's way?
Or has it always been like this? Having to wait through a pile of Crap before finding a couple of Gems. [Hmm

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sisterofmercy · 07/09/2014 17:45

Anything that compares the book to Da Vinci Code in the blurb gets thrown back. If the picture on the front features a tough but beautiful looking young woman in a leather corset, possibly stood next to a hot young man who has forgotten to put his shirt on - I avoid those like the Plague.

Also:
Dystopia
Zombie
Elf

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:44

Bertie, so it's basically told you the WHOLE story! :)

OP posts:
CatKisser · 07/09/2014 17:44

Scrawly illustrations of a ditzy-looking skinny woman in pink, carrying oversized handbag, glass of white wine with an "Oh my liiiiiife" expression on her face.

Hilarity is guaranteed not to ensue.

BeerTricksPotter · 07/09/2014 17:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:39

Disgruntled,
The female 'get togethers' have to be the Worst.

'
*Four friends get together at a wedding, united by a family secret''

Excuse me while I slip off into a Coma.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 07/09/2014 17:37

Oh wow, this is great.

Googled the "One Plus One" book and got Jojo Moyes' site in German (I'm in Germany, it's not randomly trying to confuse me). Chrome translated it for me so I get this excellent description instead:

Once accepted, your life is anything but round. Your husband has flown the coop. You barely manage to keep your family afloat. Your talented daughter gets a unique opportunity. But you lack the money to allow her dream. Suddenly there is a wad of cash. You know that it is wrong. But in one fell swoop would be your life so much easier ... And once accepted, you strandest middle of the night with your children on the road - and that the man who owns the money in front of you and offers to carry you? Would you enter? Would you eventually admit him during your crazy road trips, what have you done? And is that possible, when you fall in love just in this man?

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:36

Gritty = Hard Work

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Shodan · 07/09/2014 17:36

And anything with clogs/bonnets/shawls on the cover.

Miserable tripe that usually includes the same phrases repeated ad nauseam.

DisgruntledAardvark · 07/09/2014 17:35

Three sisters who don't get on are forced to put their differences aside when...
One is no doubt a hard-nosed career woman, one a worn down mother of sixteen, and the other a free spirit. They overcome their differences and reminisce over their childhood over copious bottles of white wine. The free spirit might have a cocktail, just to show she's a bit crazy.

Shodan · 07/09/2014 17:34

God yes.

'Gritty'. Also to be found lauding the content of a crap Channel Four production- 'A Gritty Drama'. Sometimes, but not always, coupled with 'Mean Streets'.

Bog off with your grit.

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:34

High heels with a City Scape background.

OP posts:
Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:33

I would too, especially if it was the 3 books for a tenner offer.

OP posts:
BrianButterfield · 07/09/2014 17:32

High heels on the cover.

tipsyloolah · 07/09/2014 17:32

Sad thing is Game, if that was £3.85 in Tesco, I'd still buy it Grin . . .

Original poster
sweetnessandlite · 07/09/2014 17:31

MrsS,
around Christmas time espeically, there seems to be a Glut of embossed gold, silver and glittery text on covers!

I always know it's going to be a rubbish book when I see that!

OP posts:
MrsSchadenfreude · 07/09/2014 17:30

Any embossed gold text on the cover.