50 shades of grey is a pile of shite.

one thing i dont understand - if it's fanfiction, how come 'edward' is a massively successful businessman with weird sexual tastes? not a vampire at high school...isnt that like....a different story??

Does anyone else feel Ana might actually be George Takei,

To add, I feel obliged to read it and am joining in the discussion because I got it free from fabulous Mumsnet. But oh my (cough) this book angers me!

Oh no I just bought from Amazon cos I am curious like the cat !

I am on my 3rd attempt to read this and verge on throwing the book across the room every time I read "Oh my" (in italics) or about Christian's pants that won't stay up (no, that's NOT sexy. It's builder's bum) or Ana/Bella falling over or biting her damn lip again. And what was that rubbish about her getting drunk and throwing up on her jeans?

It's awful, absolutely the worst novel I've ever read. I keep saying to the people I know who are reading it, get yourself on to the net and read some decent erotic fanfiction. It's dire. It's all I have tos ay. I can't believe it got published with all the repetitions and "Oh mys" in it.

But I have to read it so I can join in the debates! All I can say is if this is really the level of writing and the type of "hero" women are considering to be changing their lives and hooking them then there is no hope! I couldn't stand the controlling Edward Cullen so maybe that's why I'm so appalled. But how can people be so "inspired" by such a control freak in today's society? What happened to equality and feminism............

I think I need to burn my first book to save society!

Oh my. It is the worst piece of writing I've seen since I used to read Mills and Boone as a teenager. Oh my. I gave up after 30 pages or so. Oh my. Dreadful book.

Exactly right back at ya sieglinde . The fact that i didn't pay for them and that she put these up as a freebie for the fanfiction community makes me feel a whole lot more benevolent towards her and her writing. It's a silly fairy tale with a bit of kinky sex thrown in. End of.

If i'd paid for them i'd be outraged on so many levels.

Exactly, franke.

If it's silly and romping, and badly written, and it IS INCREDIBLY BADLY WRITTEN AND CLUNKY, why pay for the goddamned thing?

Google for snowqueens icedragon master of the universe. You can download it as an ibook, ffs.

It's a continuing mystery to me that Stephenie Meyer hasn't taken legal action.

I've nearly finished the first one.

I haven't read the whole thread so forgive me if I am repeating what has already been said
I am good with smut, "riders" by Jilly Cooper excellent crap IMO.
But this is SHITE of the highest order.

1. "oh my" 50 million times!
2. "my body shattered into a thousand pieces"again and again
3. " he looked yummy" yummy? Come on!
4. " my own Christian Grey flavoured Popsicle"...uugg, I used to like ice pops, how revolting.
5. The first time Grey takes Anastasia ( stupid name) back to his flat he takes off his jacket and pours her a glass of Chablis ( nice wine) then eventually takes her to his bedroom and takes off his jacket....hang on, is he wearing 2 jackets?

1. Let's mention a few composers (just had Pachelbel) to show readers I'm clever!
2. Taylor? Hmmmmmm

Crap crap crap..........and all the build up about the red playroom, disappointing.

I don't understand why people are paying good money for these books. The original fanfiction is still available free online. It's about 90% identical to the final print version. Put your credit cards away and get googling

rip off of Story of O..me thinks..I am fed up with the "oh my" bit..very juvenile

There's a really good story in this book somewhere. Dark, damaged guy brought back towards the light etc etc.

However, did these books actually have an editor? When I read them I feel myself going into teacher mode, wanting to put big red crosses through endlessly repetitive text and very bad sex. I can't believe people are calling this mummy porn. It's not in the least erotic or exciting. Still I am slogging my way through book 3 LOL.

Half way through the 1st one and HOLY SHIT! It's bad. It's repetitive, it is badly written and makes me angry for women!

Please, please, domination in the bedroom is one thing but, honestly, never should a woman relinquish power in real life. We had to fight so hard to get any, don't give it up for kicks!

But I got the kindle triple edition, due to the hype, and I will have to finnish them. (and that makes me even more angry!)

You're right this is shite, but me and my inner goddess (!) reckon it's enjoyable shite.
I skip the sex scenes as they're really boring but having once been in a controlling relationship with someone who was also rather wealthy I find that bit of the story rather interesting and the email exchanges rather familiar!

I've read book one and I'm going to flick through the next two - it's the only way to read them.

If I have to find anything positive about it it would be her smart mouthing him on the emails they sent each other which were quite witty at times but other than that it was shite!

But I enjoyed it.

It's shocking. Shockingly awful.

Hahahaha! I love the scathing comments ...

and ... dare I say ... I loved the books! shock!

The sex does get repetitive and it is unrealistic ... and I consciously ignored the annoying Batman-isms of Ana Steele - but I found this approach (and maybe its the amateuristic nature of EL James' writing) quite refreshing. I liked that there aren't pages upon pages of environment descrptions and that there isn't a huge, building intro that means you're half way through the book before the story really starts. I do think the characters are developed, albeit subtley and not as complex as you're more credible literature - but I do see character development in this series which are hinted at through the first one and grown further in books 2 and 3.

Yes - its not shakespear but I can see why women love it and want more of it ... but I can also see why theres such a huge backlash and scorn.

Plus the criticisms are damn funny :-D

Just finished reading the first one after everybody I knew said how filthy it was. Pile of old rubbish, not in the least bit erotic and this is coming from someone who's labour was triggered off after watching an episode of a Jilly Cooper mini series, so it doesn't take much!!

catpower at your reaction
But flogging session when 6 months pregnant then declaring baby loves sex cause it's thrashing about, vile !!!
I'm struggling to keep my lunch down tbh, so fucking glad I didn't bother reading more than the first couple of chapters of the first book!!

I'm halfway through the second one and can't be bothered o read the rest of it or the last book. Can someone summarise what happens? Thanks.

New patches - too funny!!!! And true!

I need a vomiting smilie face.