Present ideas - wealthy friend has offered Christmas gifts for my children

No. Still rude. And your ridiculous communication style explains why your in laws had zero idea wtf was going on.

As the wealthy friend/family member, I’m very wise to this kind of grabbiness. Hopefully your friend is too.

I'd be inclined to say something like " how thoughtful, DC1 is really enjoying cooking at the moment and I'm sure they'd love a children's cook book and DC2 loves any animal related book "

Ewww ‘do both’ 🫠

This post actually makes me feel slightly sick, go back with something at around the 20 quid mark for each child, don’t be such a grabby weirdo.

Just because somebody is wealthy doesn't mean they are going to spend a lot of money on your children!

I'd suggest giving a general category of gift that could cover a wide range of prices eg something to play with outside, lego, something for arts and crafts, something musical, or whatever your children are into. If they push for something specific then I think it is fine to ask for a rough budget as otherwise it is really hard to know what to suggest.

Super rude to ask for money, and this could potentially hurt the friendship too. I would assume she wants to spend a normal amount on a gift.

I hope your "friend" gets wise to how you see her.

What makes you think it's a large budget?
It's possible it isn't. It's a grabby mindset to assume someone will dish out large sums of money just because they are wealthy.

Ex was very wealthy. When buying presents, and with anything really, he would get very quickly tired of other people's "well, it's like 50p to him" view of being entitled to expensive things.

In order to be polite and not look like a grabby twat asking for cash for a toddler and assuming you have the entitlement to a large budget I would choose something your DC would actually like, that the standard version would be around £15 - £30 and you will probably get an extremely nice version of that.

See above where PP asked for an art set and got a very high quality set.

Hmm? Sports car and a Chanel bag?

Has your friend given gifts in the past?
I agree that despite them being wealthy, that doesn't necessarily mean they will be a generous gift giver.
Interesting how you comment about wanting money for investment, why not suggest gifts you would normally buy and then put the money you have saved into the accounts instead.

You: This is probably the rudest thing I’ve read!

Me: You... clearly dont read a lot..!

Mystery solved....

😅 how on earth did you get from your lack of communication with your in-laws to I “don’t read much” 😂

The wealth you think they have does not determine the amount a gift costs.

I would suggest a special Christmas book each, some pyjamas or a little stocking filler.

I suggested to a rich friend once that DD would love some coloured pencils as she loved drawing, anticipating a small set and maybe a sketch book. She got the biggest set I’ve ever seen of Caran d’Ache pencils and I shudder to think how much they cost.

I’d go for a book token and say they’d love to go to the bookshop to choose a book, then it’s up to them how much they spend plus it’s a nice trip out after Christmas

What would you do when your inlaws absolutely insist of gifting bags and bags of shite to a 3 and 1 yo.
It took 2 days to open just the gifts from mil during xmas 2025.
They both "gave up" repeatedly.

I have tried asking for one thing. I have suggested if they want to gift lavishly they put it in a kids savings account.

All to no avail.... should i really keep all this unnecessary junk in my house for years????

i have wishlist as earlier this year i came home to find a motorised jeep car had been delivered - it tipped me over the edge

we live in london... we.do not have a 1/2 acre lawn for a garden.. its very burdensome to be frank.

You also clearly dont read a lot..! Have a lovely evening

I would say the same to a millionaire friend as I would a friend on a budget.

A book/art stuff, feltips etc./t shirt/football/baking stuff/any kind of game/sweets/slime (woe betide me)

They can then pick and choose as they see fit,and the kids are grateful no matter the present!

My best friend/kids Godmother is actually rather wealthy,but we stick to 20eu for birthdays and Christmas per DC (2 each) and put alot of thought in2 each one.Tis a win win.

This is probably the rudest thing I’ve read!

You set up an Amazon wishlist and pretend it’s full of things your kids would like but fully intend to regift it? wtf

And you’d lie to them and say oh, buy something and also donate to their savings 🤯 wow

Maybe: "or put something into savings" would be better?

Why are they asking for Christmas gift ideas now?! Weird. And I’m a Christmas person!

You can’t ask a friend for money for a toddler. That’s crazy. Just say, oh they like books/duplo/bluey or whatever you’d say to anyone else.

I'd set up an amazon wishlist and put a range of stuff on it...i often have small things for £10/£15 I can re-use for birthday gifts for other kids (my inlaws are weird and just spend up to £100 or £150 or whatever ... they keep on clicking until they hit the target spend. Dd once 28 gifts from them one xmas 😱)

I would say
"Hi friend! Thats so kind of you!
Here's an amazon wishlist i give to family who want ideas for presents. We also have a savings account for the kids (details) our family tend to do half and half so buy them something from the list and put something into their savings."

I’m glad you don’t feel you can ask as that would be horribly grabby and your assumption that the budget will be ‘quite large’ is crass and could really damage your friendship.

’Pyjamas or a book are always most welcome’ and if someone said this to me and my budget was £10 or £100 I could easily give either a book, or pyjamas and a book or indeed both plus money for their savings should I wish.

Jellycats- most of my wealthy friends are actually quite frugal (read tight) when it comes to gift giving.