My parents have really brought me nothing but stress in my life. I grew up in an affluent area, went to a good school but was forced to wear awful clothes/ shoes (ankle length skits, tan tights and lace up shoes, no bra under a white shirt despite being a DD cup by age 14). (TMI warning but I had very few clothes and only one pair of socks and pants so had to wear them for a week and they’d be washed on a Sunday before school and were really awful by then). I wasn’t given deodorant and would stink by the end of the school week. I was horribly bullied. She made all of these decisions.
I never had a hug in my life, never told “I love you” till I met my first boyfriend. Was never taught how to tie my shoelaces or school tie… just had to work it out. But when my mum went abroad for the summer to visit her sister I was expected to cook and clean for my dad and 2 brothers while she was away at age 14.
My parents minimised my existence in favour of my brothers in that everything I’ve done was centred around them. I got married last year and when I told my mum she was lukewarm about it and never once asked about it as I planned it over 18 months. Not once! Not interested in who was going to be bridesmaid, where it would be…just no further questions after my announcement. I felt so hurt.
She turned up on my wedding day and between her and my dad they gave me £250 wedding present, in a cheque, in a card that they left at the venue on the day in some obscure place (not in the postbox we had put on the welcome table). And she got a flower bouquet from us on the day mainly because I’d be embarrassed not too .
my dad is also pretty rubbish so really this is about them both but she makes all the decisions I mentioned above and he largely trusted her to do whatever. Anyway I’m just now fed up of them and how they make me feel invisible even on the one day I’m supposed to feel special.
As I type this I realise I’m right in wanting to go no contact. I’m happiest when I’m not around them. I’m just done. 😭