could this night feeding schedule work?

You can't guarantee when baby will feed. And in the early days you'll want to feed on demand through the night. So it'll be maybe 2 months before you can start a shared schedule if you want to breastfeed.

You don't both have to feed the same number of times. It's just about your on call hours. So you are on call until 1am, he is on call from 4 am. So you need to agree how to split those few hours in the middle.

It's got good bones. You just need a bit of tweaking and you'll adapt it as you go and baby's sleep changes.

Dh brought baby to me to feed at night in the early weeks then changed and cuddled whilst I rested/slept. He had two weeks paternity and bolted on another week (of annual leave).

If you can think of feeding baby to their cues rather than thinking of it being feeding on demand it takes away the little dictator feel and turns into baby is asking not demanding.

But no, feeding to a schedule is painful for everyone.

6, but they like to feed more often to start with.

Don't try to arrange a schedule. Let the baby guide you.

If unplanned, yes. If you’re following safe co-sleeping guidelines then you can feed lying on your side and it would be safe to sleep in that position. (I doubt I could have as my boobs were a cup size K when I had DD and they could have done her some major harm!)

You cannot create a feeding schedule for a newborn that isn’t here yet.

I suggest you use the time before you have the baby to loosen up and learn to accept things around you without an obsessive need to control and anxiety around everything, because it will not be helpful with a baby.

You can’t just dictate what they will do, let alone sleep or feed.

Sorry OP but babies don’t really follow schedules!! You just have to go with the flow and watch for signs. You may find you’re constantly up all night feeding and cluster feeding. Once baby is a bit older you can try. But if baby hungry then you feed.

exhaustion is horrible. I used to have to get husband to sit and watch me so I didn’t fall asleep on baby. You can try to prop yourself up a bit so that if you flopped it’s less likely.

I think you need to seriously rethink your expectations, babies rarely feed and sleep to a strict schedule especially breastfed ones.
You staying up later to feed and settle the baby wile your DH sleeps then gets up early to give an expressed/formula feed while you sleep is a good idea in principle, but strict timelines won’t work for the first few months at least.
For the first months you’ll be lucky to get a 3-4h stretch of uninterrupted sleep.
Best way to maximise sleep with a BF newborn is to co-sleep safely and master feeding lying down

I found it really helped to get sleep whenever I could. While he’s on parental leave and at the weekends could you partner take the baby after you’ve given the first morning feed so you can sleep - or just rest in bed - until the next feed?

Are there any breastfeeding support groups in your area? Best start in North Tyneside for example welcome pregnant ladies to their peer support group sessions.

You might find it useful to ask your midwife for breastfeeding/ baby care advice while you are pregnant. Things that are perfectly normal, like cluster feeding, can come as a shock if you do not know about it beforehand.

The lullaby trust has excellent up to date information about baby sleep. NHS website also has useful guidelines about what’s normal for a baby as well.

Maybe try attending a local antenatal class? This is a great way to increase your baby knowledge and also meet other prospective parents.

The fact that you are thinking about the practicalities of baby life shows you care and that means Baby is lucky to have you as their mum. Good luck.

@flakersbakerunfortunately exhaustion is just par for the course with a new baby. You could plan for DH to do a night feed but your baby may reject a bottle. You really can't plan these things and some children don't sleep properly until they are 2 or 3. Maybe you will need a night nanny or some other such help if you really can't cope but honestly the vast majority of women get through it.

Pre baby I needed 10 hours of sleep to feel refreshed, these days I can get by on 5 although I do feel shattered all the time. Breastfeeding releases a hormone that means you get back to sleep more quickly and deeply which helps. But honestly you are going to need to sacrifice sleep (along with all your other needs!) for your baby's needs.

What would you do if the baby was a good sleeper but as a child got sick and needed you in the night? Or had nightmares and needed your comfort in the middle of the night? Your sleep cannot be the priority any more and honestly if you are going to struggle that much without sleep then maybe you will need to rethink having a child as it is not only the baby stage that is hard...

They feed on demand and this changes depending on growth spurts, leaps and supply. Sometimes they will cluster feed meaning they feed for long periods. With your first you can catch up with sleep during the day, don't plan to go to bed at 1am! They're all so very different, one of mine fed constantly, the other slept through from six weeks.

I think this is unrealistic. My three babies did not follow a pattern and it was constantly in flux. Sometimes they fed every hour. Sometimes I got 2-3 hours sleep.

this just isn’t how babies work OP sorry

I think 3h was a dream when both of mine were tiny, much closer to 2h overnight for the first few weeks.

Use what's left of the pregnancy to start a longer bedtime routine for you - go to bed with DH - or even earlier. The longer you're in bed resting, the more likely you'll be able to get more sleep, even if it's in 90 minute chunks. Don't stay up until 1am watching shit TV to give the 'laat' feed before settling down for the night as you'll still be awake several times after that.

You can't make a baby sleep so you need to train yourself to get to sleep earlier. I wish someone had told me that.

OP it’s a baby not a train schedule.

No a new born doesnt adhere to any schedule. It can feed every hour and two hours in the first weeks are normal.

You are talking about a much older baby.

Babies have small stomachs and will feed when hungry. You will just have to feed when needed.

I suggest you read a few books as you are in for quite a shock if you think you can schedule a newborn.

Please get yourself to some sort of antenatal class. Not just for the helpful info, but for the people you may meet there that may become your biggest support in those early days.

You aren’t factoring in post-natal hormones etc. I was on
my own for most of the week as DH worked away so I just had to get on with it. I’m a night owl to the stage of being vampiric and previously needed at least 10 hours a night. I just prioritised keeping the pair of us alive when DH was away……..

You going to have to be prepared for newborn stage and lack of sleep. Snatched sleep.broken sleep. You can save up to pay for day and or night time help.

I exclusively BF for a year and there was never ever a routine and he wouldn't take a bottle. Could be 2 hours sometimes more but if he went longer over night I would wake-up in agony with boobs full to the brim. Obviously that slows down once they require less breast milk.

Then there is the cluster feeding. However after a while I could feed him, put him to bed then sleep until he woke me but I went to bed early as possible.

You can plan all you want but baby may have ither ideas.
If you want to stretch the window of not feeding then baby will cry very loudly or be unsettled and you may not want that
And with a newborn you will just go with the flow
So sure make a plan as much as you like but dont expect to be able to stick to it for many months

Yeah, you can’t plan it yet.

3 hours is usually the max.

with DS I expressed and DH did the 3am feed, I did the rest. We didn’t pick the time, DS did. DH enjoyed it, though… to be honest I was always awake anyway, even if I was in my knees with tiredness, I couldn’t seem to sleep until they were.

DD has not let DH do any night feeds at all; won’t accept expressed milk, bottles, or generally DH after bedtime.

Plan the nights out when baby is here and there seems to be a routine, but then also note that it changes a LOT in the first year, with all the leaps and regressions, so it’s sort of a living plan rather than anything concrete.

Depending upon the child, the phase of the moon, the prevailing wind and whether there was the letter Y in the day, anything from 10 minutes to about 35 if I was lucky. This did improve slightly after 19 months to about 2 hours as long as I didn't blink or breathe too hard. DD2 slept better and did about 3 hours at a time for the first few weeks, which stretched to 5-6 at about 3 months.

Depending upon how much your baby actually wants to feed or have comfort, your supply will quickly match and you could be woken up by the sensation rather than the baby. Stock up on savoy cabbage leaves to chill and use to cool down engorgement enough to get a let down reflex (shrugging your shoulders and drinking water encourages it) and if they still sell Sticklebrick toys, they're great for avoiding blocked ducts.

@flakersbakerinitially I was recommended to feed or express at least every 3 hours.

Why are you concerned about this at present, out of interest?