Next doors child always in my house

When she came over today I was upstairs sorting washing and I heard my son shout, are you coming to my house today… I can hardly say no then. As I said, he likes playing with her, so I’d feel like a mega bitch mother just saying no, for what he would think is no reason.

No, sorry. 7 year olds don’t call the shots. Woman up, will you?

I know, it's so hard isn't it? When your children are enjoying the company and you'd rather they were in your house than the other house where you don't entirely trust the level of supervision, but even so it's so annoying knowing you are being completely taken advantage of. I've has this situation several times over the years.

thank you you have put this more clearly than I did

I dunno....I think at 7 its a bit young for kids to just wander off on their own without an adult somewhere being broadly responsible for the child....knowing they went to the shop and roughly how long they will be.....going to the park in a gang and not alone....same with calling for friends...maybe not expected but knowing they will be let in.

You have to just say not today when you don’t want her there. We had similar with a neighbours kid. I’d be in the pool with my Dd and she’d just appear in her swimsuit and get in. Wouldn’t actually leave when I told her to. She lived there three years and we only solved it by telling her no, my Dd is not playing today. She’ll come knock for you when she wants you to come over. Thankfully they’ve just moved a few streets away, haven’t seen her since.

Being left for hours on end with people who don't care and don't monitor her and don't give her food or drinks...
It's not good is it.
Supposing OP is out. Child might just wander off in search of some other amusement or company.
Or someone who might give her food or drinks...

The OP has sent her child over to the great grandparents to play too, also neglect?

Don’t open the door

So now any parent who lets their child out of their sight needs to be reported 🤔
No calling for friends, going to the shop or the park?

It is neglect. They're not organising for the child to have food and drink and they're leaving her in the care of neighbours without checking with the neighbours. This is how children go missing. "Oh I thought she was with X..." Plus there are known risk factors in the child's background AND she's not even being cared for by a parent but by relatives of a relative, in what sounds like poor health.

Ring doorbell and just say “not today”

job done !

they know where she went. not where she is Big difference.

Just open the door and say "sorry Anna you can't come in today - I don't feel like having company today". If she started to argue I'd just cut her off and say "sorry, thats my awnser, goodbye" and close the door.

Without saying a word to us yes. They walk in next door, see the great grandparents, they’re there for 10 mins then she’s knocking on my door or my son hears her talking and says “xxxx is here”

They're not randomly dumping her in the street, grandparent and child are all going to the great grandparents and then the child is coming to knock for her friend. They know where she is.
Sounds totally normal, most 9 year olds are going to prefer to play with another child rather than sit with great grandparents.

I can't believe you think children of this age knocking for their friends is a safeguarding issue.

No but grandparents who are supposed to be looking after a child just dropping the child off, not checking she's give in to the correct house. The great grandparents sound like they might not be able to look after the child as well. Possibly not feeding the child. Child wandering off to another house.......

Not sure how that's related to a 9 year old asking the child next door if they want to play. Not quite roaming the streets alone.

I get that it might be annoying for the OP to have an extra child over when she wasn't expecting it, but that's not neglect and it's ridiculous to try to conflate mild irritation with neglect. The OP just has to say no.

Playing with the child next door is nowhere near 'neglect'.

yup. Even when I was a kid and had a pet dinosaur, we didn't roam around alone but in groups and the parents knew pretty much where we would be....and we were 9ish, not seven!

Threads like this baffle me where fully grown adults are scared of setting boundaries with other people and in this case children.

You are the parent, adult and home owner here.

You are the one who tells your son and this other child there’s no play dates today and that they can’t come in.

You also tell the adults involved that you’re not responsible for looking after this child and to stop sending them round.

Glad you find child neglect so funny. Massive safeguard concerns with what is happening with this child.

So?