The Goose and Carrot Pub Thread

Yes DD’s psych ending up saying they were frightened of poisonous spiders and DD wished them luck working through their fear…

It was quite funny watching the psychologist trying to convince DD1 that we should be scared of being next to a poisonous snake.

oh! We had exactly the same with poisonous spiders DD thought it irrational to be afraid of them.

@Violasilkie I think GP will be fine. You can say he's been discharged from other services because he couldn't participate.

I do believe the pain is real. I just don't know if she can accurately describe the level of pain. 'Pain is what the patient says it is' holds well until every single time you are told that she's never had a pain like this before and that it's the very worst pain she's ever had. DD1 asks if she's going to die. Strangely, if I just say 'No', she doesn't believe me. If I say 'Not tonight. You're going to die one day, because we all will, but I'm pretty sure it won't be tonight.' she's reassured. Barmy.

The psychologist started working on the concept of panic, linking the idea that when we panic the pain seems worse. DD1 was respectful, but skeptical. It didn't help that the subject of snakes came up and the psychologist tried to use it as a tool to contrast rational panic (poisonous snake should make us worry) and irrational panic (I've run out of baked beans), but DD1 just got fixated on loving all animals and not being scared of any animal.

@Lougle i don’t think DD1 is pretending she is clearly highly distressed. I’m not surprised DD3 is struggling with it all. Pretending would be the better option then it could all go away. So very tiring for you all.

@roaringdragon sadly another example of headline shocking events (being injured) that becomes so routine that it can be listed out like a routine occurrence.

@Violasilkie i am thinking a lot about what other people experience compared to our family. It’s easy to lose sight of how different and difficult all of our lives are. I have no doubt your DS qualifies for PIP even without recent intervention. Use an additional sheet to explain that DS has not been able to leave the house for x many years or access intervention (although you tried), has not left the country, been on public transport or in a car etc. due to serious psychological harm. Good luck I’ve only filled in the front pages and I’m already sad.

It reminds me of the time DD2 got hysterical when she was about seven, screaming

”I’m dying! I’m going to die in two minutes….ten seconds….!”

At ten seconds, we told her, there was no point us calling an ambulance, because it couldn’t possibly get to our house in time! She didn’t die in ten seconds! We could only think she had indigestion!

That is not to say your DD1 doesn’t genuinely have something wrong with her - it may just be doctors can’t work out what it is, because they haven’t done the right test yet, as it’s unusual.

We spent years describing the symptoms of DD1’s metabolic disorder and doctors just said

”That’s unusual!”

It was - it was ultra rare!

Phone call with new EP today. Not completely sure we will get a useful report out of them, either, but they were slightly surprised by the previous EP's overreach. Also suspect DS will not perform as required (did have to point out that doing a full scale IQ was unlikely to be a goer due to his gnat-like attention span).

Thanks @PurringTiger DS does eat lychee and pretty much every fruit known to man. Cooking sounds good. We are joining you with the PIP renewal form just got it today and have until 5 November. We initially applied online but not sure that is an option this time I will phone them and see when I can motivate myself to spend an hour on their phone line.

Sorry DD1 has been distraught @Lougle. I can see why DD3 suspects attention and sibling jealously and that's common amongst siblings but trying to get taking into hospital is very niche so I would presume DD1 believes herself at risk. I think also when someone else is very ill it makes you more aware. And if she's getting herself worked up that can cause all kinds of pain.

We did gardening today - we told DS and he stayed inside like he would take a bath but then I cleaned the kitchen floor and laundry room first and he got a bit impatient and went out to the lane. Though went through the window leaving the bathroom door locked. So we didn't spend too long in the garden but still got a fair amount done and the silkies were very happily following me everywhere singing.

Latest we have for the bath is 22 October but that's subject to change. I was hoping PIP form would be more delayed but at least it didn't arrive at the start of June. The only issue is we have no contacts to put down - I can try GP or keyworker but its not ideal timing with work going on downstairs and shed with temp roof on. I can't really book plumber and electrician in for bath either until we are certain bath is arriving.

I hope you took it in the spirit intended! Someone asked me to go for lunch and I had appointments on all the times suggested. I told her that I bet she was jealous of how fulfilling my work is (she's a doctor, so I'm sure she has a much more interesting week!). It's good that you've got the doxy, but I hope you hear back from the hospital, too. Did the GP swab it?

I also think it's not made up. If it was, it would be the most boring and exhausting way to spend hours at a time. I think she's truly terrified that she is very unwell, that we don't believe her, and we don't love her enough to help her, so she's going to die. I go through the motions of temperature, heart rate, occasionally blood pressure, to make sure that I'm not discounting a serious illness on the basis of previous episodes, but I have to balance the fact that people who are in pain and hysterical do have elevated heart rates, and crying hysterically does warm you up, etc., so she probably thinks that I'm ignoring the risky signs that she's very unwell. She sometimes snaps "was a nurse!" if DH tries to reassure her by pointing out that I know what I'm doing.

Is it wrong that I sniggered at your casual description of your war wounds @roaringdragon . I'm sorry, it's so inappropriate. I hope you get it seen again. It must be very painful.

I took DD1 to a petting farm while DD3 was in college today. It was raining so it wasn't brilliant and DD1 was really anxious about her power attachment for the wheelchair. She thought that it wouldn't hold on the slopes (it was fine) and that it would break in the rain (also fine). In the end I took her to the farm cafe for a bit of cake and hot chocolate to waste a bit of time.

The pain thing is really difficult. She's sobbing and writhing with pain, but DD3 told me (and DH confirmed) that she quietened down when I was out with DD2, and ramped up when I returned. DD3 is furious because she thinks she's making it up for attention. DD1 is distraught because DD3 thinks she's making it up. I think that subconsciously she knows that I make decisions about whether she goes to hospital and she's terrified she's going to die, so the crying increases when I get home to communicate that she's really ill and needs help. It's utterly exhausting for everyone.

Rhubarb carfloute went back in and was delicious. DD made it for DH and I’ve noticed a bit more engagement than only stirring which is progress.

@roaringdragon sorry I muddled the two! Was thinking that the recent wound wasn’t healing and hoping you had given an update that it was.

@Zzzzzs lovely husbands are the best thing ever!

@JumpersFluffy is DD2’s exam soon?

@drspouse nice surprise!

we just made a rhubarb carfloute that is still like runny batter at the bottom
after 40 mins in the oven. I’ve put it back in.

@roaringdragon how is your hand doing? Is it showing signs of healing yet?

@Lougle sorry DD1 is suffering again this week, she must be so tired.

@Violasilkie great that baths are being taken again. Has DS tried lychees?

@Fififizz we do, we really all do understand somewhat of how you are feeling. It’s not a normal tiredness resolved by sleep. Honk honk

Both DCs carried the candles in at church today, rather to our surprise as we thought they were in Junior Church!
DS has just made (heavily supervised) choc chip cookies and DD is going to a new music group (new to her) with me tonight. She's so up and down about her music, but I think this is about the right speed, and her teacher is moving her towards Grade 1, I think it will be good for her to work towards a goal and also play with others at her level (they have a beginners group that plays with the main group a couple of times a term, and I play in the main group).

@roaringdragon I hope you feel better soon. Could it be the antibiotics aren’t working?

You might need to go back on Monday.

DD1 is crying in pain again. That's three times this week.