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SEN

Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

Mind is a blur. New shock diagnosis + National Offer Day yesterday

33 replies

NewtoAuDhd · 04/03/2026 04:11

This was not on the cards AT all, just didn’t see it coming. I must have been so blind - how could primary school have not said anything??

Very long story short…National Offers Day yesterday and we got our first and only choice, the local comp. DD passed the 11+ but due to significant trauma at a previous primary school, we wanted her to be with friends that support her and have her back & is closer to home.

24 hrs later: a Prescibing Practitioner & ‘family’ specialist from the council recommended by school have both today come to the same conclusion that DD has Autism and Adhd.

She’s going to be assessed by CAHMS imminently.

I have no issue with this at all but am now massively concerned that she is about to start Year 7 in a school that is so wrong for her. ☹️

Where do I even start with all of this please?
I’m the worst mum. How could I not see it?

Paperwork? Assessments? Meetings - with who? Choose a more suitable school?

OP posts:
Nowwarm · 04/03/2026 10:37

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NewtoAuDhd · 04/03/2026 10:33

Ok, so, timeline, have gone through diary, emails and docs. V sleep deprived. Other stuff going on as well.

Started biting herself when she was 6, in lockdown. No punctures. Superficial is what the GP said.

4 schools & a housemove later, (to escape family trauma) DD asked to see a therapist or to speak to someone, to get some help. This school has been amazing. The Lead Nurse in Feb told me to contact CAHMS which I did. Speaking with them formally in a few wks; in the meantime they also have said the biting - in their opinion - in emotional deregulation.
I really do not have any issue with my beautiful dd having SEN, I believe in her being an individual and being her best self, she is loved for being her.

I asked the teacher and Head (she’s been at this school for two terms) for their thoughts on ASD and ADHD. They both said it’s hard to gauge.

The school asked me to see the Prescibing Practicioner at the GP. She diagnosed AuDhd on the basis DD’s leg was shaking and minimal eye contact.

I’m absolutely fine with a diagnosis, this doesn’t bother me, I’m just overwhelmed with the next steps as the Prescibing Practitioner has said I need to get a list from school staff of any signs they see in my child.

OP posts:
ExistingonCoffee · 04/03/2026 10:26

A Prescribing Practitioner and family specialist from the council can’t diagnosis. They can recommend an assessment but they can’t diagnose.

If DD has only just been referred for assessment, it is highly unlikely she is going to be diagnosed imminently. There are long waiting lists. The diagnostic assessment will involve paperwork and assessments.

Speak to the SENCO at the current school and offered school.

A diagnosis doesn’t change DD’s needs and it won’t automatically result in more support. Support in schools is based on needs, not diagnosis. If you thought the offered school could meet DD’s needs before this week, that doesn’t automatically change now.

Nowwarm · 04/03/2026 10:16

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Buscobel · 04/03/2026 10:15

Do you think the school will be so wrong for her? There are children with autism and ADHD who function and thrive in mainstream secondary school. Not all, of course, but I’ve taught them and they’ve been successful. A discussion with the SENCo at the school would be useful.

You say the primary school have not said anything, but they must have asked someone to see her in school if a family specialist has visited.

NewtoAuDhd · 04/03/2026 10:03

Nothing. Honestly. We had a GP appointment at Christmas because of her biting, the GP did an urgent referral to CAHMS. The GP said the biting isn’t self-harming, that it’s emotional disregulation due to previous trauma.

She’s on her 4th primary school due to significant safeguarding issues at the others.

I didn’t come here for any kind of sick game. MN will confirm I’m an old-timer. I came for advice.

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Nowwarm · 04/03/2026 08:14

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Nowwarm · 04/03/2026 07:15

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