AIBU to think teacher should have consulted about this?

@Hobsbawm agree with everything you say 100%
@seaweedandmarchingbands - aggressive much 😮

Rinoachicken

Although my comment wasn’t directed at you specifically, your laughing faces when someone suggested the teacher might actually have taken some time to understand your son’s educational needs - you know, as a teaching professional who is now responsible for your child’s education - weren’t very polite, were they? The teacher may not be an expert in ASD but she is now the person leading on your child’s education. She needs to take his ASD into account, along with many other factors, and make the decisions she thinks will best support his learning.

Then to be honest, I would not be happy with that, if there was no discussion with your DS about what he felt would be best for him. I don't think it would hurt for you to catch up with the teacher to talk through how things are going in his new class and understand their reasoning behind moving your DS..

I have a desk that I offer to pupils if I see they are struggling to focus, and they can also ask me to sit there if they wish if they feel they need to, but it's not someone's permanent workspace. Sitting someone on their own feels like exclusion IMO, and if I felt the need to do that, then that would warrant a phone call or chat at hometime to discuss.

sauvignonblancplz
SisterSistineThat’s a blatant exaggeration.... really is and very unhelpful.

It really isn't in my experience, unfortunately.

It would be a huge waste of time to phone every parent for every change to the seating plan. That precious time is spent planning for those individual needs. Nobody is saying you need to phone every parent when you change the seating plan.

No, classroom teachers aren’t “experts” in ASD. 🙄 They are still the professional in their classroom and, provided they have a sensible rationale for a decision regarding a seating plan, it’s their decision to make. If you are going to send your child to be educated by an adult, you need to respect that adult’s qualifications and boundaries as a professional, not regard them as some idiot who happens to be babysitting your child while you are at work.

It is a constant battle to ensure that ds's needs are met at school. There have been individuals who have been fantastic, there have been some instances of really poor practice.

Making the assumption that these are the experts who all know what they are doing, and should be trusted with knowing what is best for your child at all times, would be very naive.

Very often the difficulties with ds could have been averted with communication ....something which ds's school has really struggled with...and one of the reasons why a good, open partnership with parents is important.

Actually, I'm quite cross that a teacher could possibly think they are a specialist or expert in ASD - no wonder it is so hard to get the right support sometimes.
Never mind the those who train, research, and work in the field for years - we don't need them. The average school teacher is an expert. 😡

Is the new setup your son's choice @Rinoachicken ? Was it discussed with your son?

I work in Year 5 (and in Year 6 too) and we would usually have a discussion direct with the child with a view to supporting them in their work or wellbeing (re change of seating). We would not usually discuss it with the parent beforehand. If a child had been moved because they were disrupting themselves or others, then we would discuss it with the parent.

Anyone who thinks anyone genuinely really know each and every individual child out of 300 is, well,...

And the idea that implementing a specific support strategy for a child with ASD is the same as a general change to a seating plan... That kind of proves the point that (sadly) many teachers know very little about ASD, ADHD, etc.

@sauvignonblancplz which bit is an exaggeration? I can honestly back up every bit.

OP your questions and concerns are completely valid, don't worry. Write down your concerns and arrange to chat to the teacher-they will understand you're a worried mum. He's happy in class which is a great start! Perhaps between you and the teacher you can agree steps (once the term is settled) to then help him socially. It might be that there are lunchtime clubs he could attend? Our lad who, as I said, is very popular wasn't always! What really helped him socially was in year five he was made a prefect and was given a year two 'buddy' to help out when they joined school. Supporting the younger boy with settling in etc. (he was new to school) seemed to help my son develop his social skills somehow. Talk to the teacher and see what can be done-no child should be 'lonely' at play time. Alone by choice, yes, (I feel that shit in my soul!!) but lonely needs some support.

You're clearly a lovely mum, OP. He's lucky to have you in his corner

It’s not aggressive at all, you’ve asked aibu, you’ve got answers you don’t like and you’re being defensive is actually more accurate .

Go to the teacher with your concerns & review again at half term. Sorted. I’m sure all will be fine and your son will thrive under a teacher who has clearly taken some time to understand your sons needs.

And it really isn’t just about being happy. My son is happy when he gets to hide out in the Head’s office doing the odd worksheet and playing with Lego. But is that a good idea? Is it helpful? Not really.

There is nothing wrong with checking that all aspects of a child’s needs and development are being met. A workstation can be a great thing. But it can also be detrimental if it’s just used to exclude a child from the rest of the class. However “happy” that child might seem.

@Rinoachicken even! I wish there was an edit function 😂

@rhinochicken - have a quick chat with the school to get a bit more information.

And perhaps next time post a question like this on one of the SEN boards...

They are not experts or specialists. They do need to get to know the individual child.

Speak for yourself. I teach 300 kids a week and I try to know all their individual needs. A teacher of 30 will eventually know them very well indeed.

It would be a huge waste of time to phone every parent for every change to the seating plan. That precious time is spent planning for those individual needs.

@SisterSistine That’s a blatant exaggeration.... really is and very unhelpful.

Just a thought but if he’s happy at his new desk, perhaps it might give him the space he needs to then spend his energy on socialising skills during lunch and break.

Perhaps this desk might allow him to use his reserves of energy at the best times, rather than him having to be socially ‘on’ all the time.

It must be exhausting for him and this might just be the happy medium he needs to allow his socialising skills to blossom when they are needed.

Just a possibility of course.