Ageism should be against Talk Guidelines

I totally agree @DogGawn and I apologise if I have somewhat derailed the thread by being drawn into discussions about clothing.

Ageism is absolutely rife on this site.

Lots of people dress in a uniform way. We live near a secondary school with a strict uniform policy.
on non uniform days, the students still dress in a uniform way- jeans, hoodies, trainers and backpacks.
They are stereotyping themselves in order to belong to and conform to a group.
It occurs in every demographic and is not insulting in any way, so do not command me not to do something as you did.
How prickly your responses are @SomeGarlic maybe the heat is getting to you, I suggest you go and have a lie down with a fan on. Meanwhile I shall go and sort out my wardrobe and throw out my crimplene pull ons and tartan slippers.

I've never seen anyone in them! I'm an elderly person surrounded by elderly people, and my extremely elderly mum died this year in a nursing home full of equally old people.

Thinking about it, I'll grant you trainers with side zips. I bought a pair when I injured an ankle, and have held on to them 'just in case' 👀 But nobody wears the beige polyester bags and Velcro slippers you're imagining! You're so far off the mark with the slippers, it wouldn't be surprising if they make their way back as ironically cool yoof footwear before long.

It still comes back to this: 'dressing like an old lady' implies that older women wear some kind of uniform, and that it's ugly. This is stereotyping. It's insulting. Don't do it.

I didn’t say that at all.
People can wear joggers, sliders etc at all ages. I’ve never seen anyone other than elderly people in tartan slippers with Velcro fastenings though.

some clothes are designed for older people who might have difficulty dressing

So what you're really saying is that you don't want to dress like a person with disabilities? It's nonsense that young people prefer uncomfortable clothes, so we're left with 'declining mobility'.

It's also a nonsense idea that there's some sort of uniform for people with reduced mobility, of course.19-year-olds and 69-year-olds have access to the same clothing as everyone else, and they'll both choose looser options if their bodies won't let them move so much.

So, yes, you might choose never to wear joggers, pull-on skirts or sliders if you associate them with 'dressing like a disabled person'. You'd be a bit bonkers, though, and I wouldn't advise saying it out loud in public.

Mind you, if you fancy a laugh at me, pop on over here: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/style_and_beauty/5550987-today-im-dressed-like-an-old-lady

But that's you assuming everyone of 70 dresses the same. I don't think everyone of 20 has the same style.

And presumably when you're 70 you don't know how you'll dress? The same as you do now? Maybe. Or same as when you're 45? Or in a completely different way? Or in a way you perceive all 70 year olds to dress now?! Or maybe you'll just follow fashion like a lot of people do regardless of age?

Yes I do think there is ageism on Mumsnet. If we replaced the word "boomer" with "working class" or "traveller" for example I'm sure there would be much more virtue signalling.

Because they will not be able to access their own pensions until a much older age. I have seen this view on MN, including on this thread, and I do understand where they are coming from. And yes, life was different for women born in the 50s, and I understand that too.

Lure Hsu might wang on about water and sunscreen, but freak genetics are doing the heavy lifting here. Here she is at 41, on the right. The woman on the left is her sister Sharon, 36. In the middle is their mother at 63.

https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/beauty/this-41-year-old-woman-looks-like-a-teenager-and-heres-how/articleshow/59440514.cms
It can happen!

I don’t think it’s ageist to be described as dressing like an old lady. It’s the clothing choice that’s being described, not the person, in the same way as describing dressing like a goth, or punk, or a cyclist, or any other group. All equally valid ways of dressing.
And some clothes are designed for older people who might have difficulty dressing due to declining mobility or for comfort- elasticated waists, slip on shoes etc. No-one ever wants to wear them, but sometimes needs must. A young woman wearing some of these garments would be described as dressing like an old lady.

i do think though that there is a lot of ageism on mumsnet, disrespect and spiteful comments towards older people, this should be addressed

“although my very youthful looking, slight and short auntie was once offered a half fare on the bus she got on with her 20 year old daughter I seem to remember”

That looks a bit worried- what did you mean?

Apologies if Im annoying you.

On the other hand it is absolutely likely that a person in their 60s might express ageist sentiments about the competence of a teenager and not respect their actual level of skill or knowledge in something.

I definitely agree teenagers can suffer from prejudiced ageist opinions about them.

I can understand what you're saying here but it makes no sensevto me at all. Whatever I wear I most definitely wouldn't look like a teenager (although my very youthful looking, slight and short auntie was once offered a half fare on the bus she got on with her 20 year old daughter I seem to remember)

It seems completely imaginary to think any 62 year old person would say the reason they wouldn't wear a particular garment would be because they'd look like a teenager.

I wonder what you mean when you say you are entitled to your opinion. Do you have an open mind?

Do you think 'ageist' is a term that has any meaning? If so what dies it mean to you?

To me it is about prejudice and attracting characteristics to a group that's not in any way fact based like assuming someone with a particular skin colour, place if birth, hair colour, social background inevitably has a particular characteristic. It feels bad when the characteristic is perceived as undesirable but positive seeming prejudiced descriptions can also be a problem.

I'm sure you feel misjudged in some area of life occasionally so can you have any empathy for that experience based on a different 'ism'?

@Shinyhappyapple Why do you think there will be no sympathy for WASPI women from younger women?

I haven’t seen the thread in question but I agree there is a lot of ageism on MN. Mainly along the lines of anything deemed to be ‘old’ is bad. But equally as older MNers we need to be careful not to turn the tables the other way.

Regarding the Waspi thing, whilst I do feel sorry for that group of women, I can totally understand why there will not be sympathy from younger women.

Exactly. Where does it end?!

And - as has been said - if a 62 year old woman says 'I'm not wearing that! I don't want to look like a teenager!' would that be classed as ageist?

Or does it only apply when someone is referring to someone over 50? 🙄

Of course 60 year olds dress differently to 20 year olds. It's farcical to suggest otherwise.

If we ban “like an old lady” do we have to ban “like a baby” too?

I still don't think it is.

I am entitled to my opinion.

A 20 year old is allowed to say she doesn't want to dress like a 60 year old of she wants without being accused of being 'ageist.'

How does a teenager dress? How did you dress as a teenager? Do you dress as a 50 year old now?

The teenagers I'm thinking of have a huge range of styles and preferences. Just like everyone else of other ages.

I'm not trying to be argumentative, awkward or silly. It just makes no sense given the actual people I'm picturing who are a very broad range and the different styles and preferences I've had over the years.

Typo edit