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MNHQ

UPDATE FROM MNHQ - new Hidden Gratitude feature

245 replies

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet · 04/09/2023 10:31

Today we’re launching a new feature called Hidden Gratitude. We’ve had many requests over the years for a like button on Mumsnet but shared concerns that some have expressed about it being a bit reductive and possibly turning discussions into a popularity contest.

Nonetheless, we think it would be nice to be able to thank posters for a particularly helpful or generous post. Hidden Gratitude is an easy way to show appreciation but as the name suggests, there will be no publicly visible 'like' count, only the user who has been given thanks can see it.

All you need to do is hit the “thanks” icon on the post you want to appreciate. The poster will receive a notification which will let them know who has “thanked” them. That’s it!

And, before you ask - at the time of writing we have no plans to introduce a hidden ingratitude button…

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MyColdDeadHeart · 04/09/2023 13:58

That's meant to say FWR

MyColdDeadHeart · 04/09/2023 13:58

@YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet ok then can we have a "fuck off" button but only in FAR as we get a load of flack over there ?

For Me Please GIF by CSDRMS
Ciarianna · 04/09/2023 13:52

whats the difference between BOOKMARK and SAVE

SoupDragon · 04/09/2023 13:51

I wish it wasn't right next to the "add message" link.

in fact, the order of all those links is wrong IMO. Especially with "quote" mossed off in favour of "save" which I bet is used far less.

Random789 · 04/09/2023 13:45

WhatapityWapiti · 04/09/2023 13:33

You know what? I sent you a “Thanks” for this then decided it was worth an additional “Well said” post 😀.

Show quote history

Ditto.Grin
I've both smiled and said 'good morning.'

KevinAndHerKits · 04/09/2023 13:37

JaneJeffer · 04/09/2023 13:05

So if you name change for a certain thread but were logged in as a different name you could out yourself by thanking someone then?

Not normally - for all the recipient of thanks knows the poster who thanked her could just be a random lurker. There's nothing to connect the thanks with the poster on the thread. But it's worth understanding how it works.

michalwave · 04/09/2023 13:34

Random789 · 04/09/2023 13:28

Which you can already easily do by typing on the thread.

True, but you could equally say "Why smile at a stranger when you could equally say 'Good morning'?" It's nice to have the choice. The more tools we have for being good to one another the better. Having seen the sheer power of social media functionality to shape our mental habits towards hostility I'm grateful for any little tweak that rebalances towards compassion

Well said.

JaneJeffer · 04/09/2023 13:34

I'm not a morning person

WhatapityWapiti · 04/09/2023 13:33

Random789 · 04/09/2023 13:28

Which you can already easily do by typing on the thread.

True, but you could equally say "Why smile at a stranger when you could equally say 'Good morning'?" It's nice to have the choice. The more tools we have for being good to one another the better. Having seen the sheer power of social media functionality to shape our mental habits towards hostility I'm grateful for any little tweak that rebalances towards compassion

You know what? I sent you a “Thanks” for this then decided it was worth an additional “Well said” post 😀.

Random789 · 04/09/2023 13:28

Which you can already easily do by typing on the thread.

True, but you could equally say "Why smile at a stranger when you could equally say 'Good morning'?" It's nice to have the choice. The more tools we have for being good to one another the better. Having seen the sheer power of social media functionality to shape our mental habits towards hostility I'm grateful for any little tweak that rebalances towards compassion

Cowlover89 · 04/09/2023 13:26

Good to know but i use the app

LylaLee · 04/09/2023 13:20

CoteDOpale · 04/09/2023 13:16

An upvote/downvote feature like Reddit’s would be more helpful.

It's nice that each post is 'stand alone'.

Frequent/Popular users would get sycophants blindly liking everything. And once a post gets lots of likes, sheep would mindlessly add to the likes.

People would be influenced to 'dislike' a downvoted post rather than actually considering the words.

Ciarianna · 04/09/2023 13:20

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet · 04/09/2023 12:18

You can only thank once, even if you change your username and it will show as the username at the point of giving thanks.

Show quote history

which user name? first one or second one

and why doesnt the box with 'quote' (from the 3 dots) go away when you click on quote????

Elmerchecks · 04/09/2023 13:19

Thank you

JaneJeffer · 04/09/2023 13:17

to acknowledge the thoughtfulness and helpfulness that you see so often in MN posts
Which you can already easily do by typing on the thread.

CoteDOpale · 04/09/2023 13:16

An upvote/downvote feature like Reddit’s would be more helpful.

Random789 · 04/09/2023 13:13

It's amazing how much difference the name of the button makes. Calling it a 'like' button would just encourage Twitter-like pile-ins of mass endorsement that are associated with the tribal partisanship of so much online discussion. It would be horrible and make MN worse.
But 'thanks' is personal and kind. I wouldn't use it just to express agreement, but to acknowledge the thoughtfulness and helpfulness that you see so often in MN posts.

YellowDots · 04/09/2023 13:13

So you can turn off the notifications so you don’t get an email if someone likes your post but can you turn off the likes altogether?

WhateverMate · 04/09/2023 13:11

michalwave · 04/09/2023 12:24

I hope not. I've been here for many years but I don't think I'd stay at a site that promotes a popularity contest.

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Plenty people will stay though because it's not a big deal to many, it's such a common function on so many forums.

Thelonelygiraffe · 04/09/2023 13:10

MyColdDeadHeart · 04/09/2023 10:35

Can we have a "fuck off" button please ?

👍🏼😂

AutumnCrow · 04/09/2023 13:09

michalwave · 04/09/2023 11:52

It works immediately!

I can picture a not too distant thread where a poster will post an unpopular view and then screenshot all the people who thanked them as proof that they are not alone in their thinking.

Show quote history

I know. It's going to be nauseating.

And as anyone can claim they've 'had lots of thanks already for my post', it sets the scene for rollings of eyes, 'I don't believe yous', and victimhood claims on some of the more volatile and immature threads/boards.

I suppose it might settle down. Personally, I agree that subversion is the way to go. Just keep thinking of it as a sarcastic handclap.

JaneJeffer · 04/09/2023 13:05

So if you name change for a certain thread but were logged in as a different name you could out yourself by thanking someone then?

Random789 · 04/09/2023 13:04

A hidden gratitude button is a lovely idea (nice name for it too). I'm sure I will find it really beneficial to have this easy opportunity to express positive thought/emotion. I had to leave Twitter because it is soooo easy to use it to express negative thought and emotion, which entrenches a kind of embittered righteous hostility. Returning to MN, as a Twitter substitute, I have found myself quite prone to dashing off mildly hostile/critical Tweet-like replies which leave me feeling riled up. I've also seen how many other posters reply in the same reflexively negative way, surely influenced by trends across social media.

Now it will be possible for me and other MNers to do more to nurture our nicer selves, and make ourselves happier in the process.

I haven't read the whole thread, but I'm another person who would prefer it if my 'hidden gratitude' didn't spark a notification email. I'd worry that it would be a hassle for the recipient and would prefer it if she could just see the gratitude-count piling up on her post.

MonumentalLentil · 04/09/2023 13:03

Yarnysaurus · 04/09/2023 11:20

Fair point!

Maybe quote could replace the reply button then?

Show quote history

Why not put the thanks button where they quote one has been hidden?
Or in place of share which I have never used and never will?
Or just stop messing about with it all and adding stuff we don't need because other sites have it. It's not FaceArse after all?

KevinAndHerKits · 04/09/2023 13:00

Sock puppetting to back yourself up is very bad form indeed and potentially a banning offence.

Changing names because something on the thread gives you a brilliant idea for a new name change and you then want to come back and show it off is absolutely fine. Ditto if you wanted to check how something worked on a Site Stuff thread.

Changing names because half way through a thread you suddenly realise that you have something really useful to add, but saying it under your normal name would out you as being a chartered accountant/ from Stoke Newington so you do a quick change for anonymity purposes is a grey area.