Mumsnet needs your best parenting tips!

all this talk of vomit and no one has mentioned that the most effective way of getting rid of vomit smell is to use a solution of soda bicarb! (or a paste that can be vacuumed up when it is dried)

Take the keys out of every door in your house.

A friend's two year old has recently locked himself in the bathroom, and had to be rescued by the firebrigade. (He enjoyed it, the parent's didn't...200 Euros for the fire brigade, and another 400 Euros to get a new door fitted!)

When weaning a child with reflux, avoid avocado at all costs (unless you are an 'Exorcist' fan)

Dress out of sight of your child unless you are comfortable with 'Daddy bits in purple knickers' and 'Mummy wobbly tits in bra' announced in a booming 2 year old voice in the middle of a crowded restaurant.

When out of the house, most eventualities can be catered for by carrying: four baby wipes in a nappy bag, a folded up stand-up nappy, a small packet of coloured pencils, a blank notebook and a small packet of smarties.

Tell your child that the proper name for dried fruit is 'sweeties'.

Children need boundries and you need child free time. Establish a bedtime and stick to it (within reason). You will ALL benefit.

To add to twigletts comment- baby wipes are excellent on leather sofas as well- never mind the expensive leather cleaner- there's nothing like babywipes for getting milk and sick etc off a leather suite

when babies cry they're tired, if they've just woken up and cry they're hungry, if they've just fed and cry they're bored, if they've just played and cry they're tired .. .and round and round and round it goes

Wish someone had told me that pureed carrots stain

If you learn to think how much fun it could be, stuff like your child splashing in puddles and making mud pies when you've just got them dressed to see their MIL can be funny

Baby wipes are not just for babies, they also work on stains on the couch, polishing wood, cleaning shoes .. you name it baby wipes work and are the single greatest invention known to man

Other people find it weird that your child loves broccoli but won't eat a sandwich

Other people also think you're mean when you give your DS a piece of bread with nothing on it .. you'd be surprised at how a 3 year old can freak when you mess up his bread with stuff like butter or cheese

Rediscover nursery rhymes- I can keep my dd occupied for ages anywhere by singing to her.

Don't buy a yellow potty.

my mum gave me a poster that says

mothers of little boys are busy from son up to son down (I think it should be before and after personally !).

Serious tip - young babies get tired very quickly - and overtired baby is a nightmare.

You can never have too many pairs of wellies .

Cleaning the house while the kids are still growing
is like shovelling snow when it's still snowing
I love that and look and it when I am feeling stressed when the kids have made yet another tip

As soon as you have sat yourself down in quiet cafe for well-earned coffee and newspaper break (oh OK I admit it, Heat mag), your baby will wake from his nap, never to slumber again until you are too far from coffee shop to get there before he wakes up.

"Keep the house clean enough to be healthy and dirty enough to be happy".
Since DS was born we are so terribly happy that our hous is openly testifying it

if your baby shits up to its armpits, throw away the vest (you'll have plenty) or else spend 40 mins scrubbing it, and the stains still wont come out in the wash.

Just accept beforehand that you are about to enter a new phase in life where you will feel guilty for everything you ever do(or don't do!!).

Cleaning and cooking can wait 'till tomorrow, For babies grow up, as we've learned to our sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep,
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.

Good house rule if you can't be bothered to clean!!!

Going with the banana thing.... poo after their first banana has black bits in it and you'll think something is seriously wrong and mashed carrot and courgette comes out the other end looking exactly like it did when you put it in the top end.

Haven't read all this, but has anyone said - join mumsnet - now that is a top parenting tip!!

If you've got upset by a parenting book, go and look at the shelves full of them in your nearest book shop. If any book had all the answers, there'd only be one.

If the book or article you are reading contains the words 'the baby will do X' or 'you will feel Y', chuck it. Or go through it with a biro replacing 'will' with 'might'.

Labour is different for everybody. So is parenthood.

Giving birth does not necessarily have any great meaning. I feel I bonded with my ds when I was 7 weeks pregnant and the birth was an upsetting but temporary interruption to our relationship.

Never wake a sleeping baby... unless it's got jaundice.

If your baby is crying, feed them. Even if they're not really interested, it allows you to think clearly about what else could be wrong.

Banana stains brown and comes out the other end of a baby looking like spinach.

hear hear! TRUST YOURSELF! YOU KNOW BEST!

Similar to Newton's 3rd Law, for everything in parenthood there is an opposite opinion - trust yourself - not your mother-in-law!