I think that new members should be prevented from posting on the forums for 7 days

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Colditz would agree the oldies are the biggest offenders

MellowMa see my profile now if you like...

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We could always ask the trolls to play in Troll land

seamonster, really don't worry about it. The regulars here commit far more crimes than anyone who gives the slightest though to what they are saying - certainly I have never seen you being at all 'rude'!

The BBC archers foruem (yes i know) won't post messages from new members straight away until they have been vetted, once you have posted a few times then your message automatically gets put up, however this leads to very disjointed threads. I lurked for a while befoe posting

Nooo nonono

better a thousand trolls than one mother despairing because she is lonely.

I must admit I have been on a swear thread when its dark outside! Its just for going on and swearing, sometimes you need to let it all out.
I do it when most folk are asleep and little eyes can't see my monitor by accident!

swearing on its own I do, and often

but never at people

so I might say I hate fuckwits who, or ive ahd a crap day

its just the short blunt attacks I don't like, whether they contain swearing or not

Son if someone types fyoure a fuckwit because you think that (for example) breast is the only option- that can be challenged

its just the (open post) you're a fuckwit (end of post) type things I dislike

Doesn't MN have a guideline against personal attacks anyway? Surely thats what these things are?

awen - swearing open for discussion. IMO, people swear in their everyday conversation, so shouldn't be censored unless they swear at someone else as a way of insulting them.

I wouldn't censor swearing unless it was a personal insult. But, that's just me...others (and HQ) might think differently.

Is there somewhere that new people can read about these things? People keep saying things like hijacking someone's thread, or trolling etc and I don't know what these all mean. I would hate to think that I might have said or done something (unwittingly) that may have been one of these things. That said I have avoided reading and/or joining in with things that I think aren't strictly necessary or may be a bit 'off' which goes to show that even someone as slow as me can make decisions as to whether I join in being nasty or not. In the end just as in life we all have to make the decision as to what we read and how we reply to each other.

Earlybird - do you mean that for swearing then? I swear sometimes.. like shite, feck etc. I Hope it isnt as it would be a bit restricting. Obv understand if you get little trolls on here inciting racial hatred etc but the thought of not being able to swear doesnt seem reasonable.

Maybe Mumsnet HQ should think about some sort of 'virtual ASBO' warnings or even bans for posters who repeatedly incite, insult, bait etc to the real detriment of the forum.

I agree that we shouldn't stifle debate, and that in real life vitriol exists (almost wrote 'bitchriol' ), but there should be standards of what is unacceptable - especially if it threatens to discourage valued well intentioned members from reading/posting/participating/supporting.

Should there be some sort of '3 strikes and you're out' warning system from Mumsnet HQ so that the basic integrity of the forum is maintained? Why should the majority have things spoilt because we're so determined to be 'fair' to a few unreasonable posters?

yes noddy its nice to see them, mad or not.

Oh no I like the mad new people

Madamez, if it makes you feel better, swear and insult away. It obviously serves a purpose in your life. Perhaps you should channel all that agression into something a bit more positive.

But equally as you claim a right to be as insulting as you like, I claim a right to tell you that I think it is aggressive, un-constructive and doesn't really serve any purpose other than to antognise. But, that is just my opinon and I am as equally entitled to it as you are.

Uurgh it sounds to me that you want to create an overcontrolled hierarchical chat site. In life, there are always going to be those who insult/swear/jeer no matter what the forum are there not? Surely we're all old enough and big enough just to ignore it.

I found MN amazingly helpful and soothing when asking for advice when my babe was littler but quit writing on it later on as found it full of santimonious, I'm wittier than you are type people - very dull. By putting in place all these rules and embargos you coudl be putting someone off who is in need of urgent help just so the "regulars" feel they, as the top dogs, get the best use of the site....

Despite all this wailing about nasty sweary people who argue, what is not coming across is any suggestion that people who join and post because they are anxious, desparing or afraid are getting sworn at overmuch_ all the trolling, malice and mischeif doesn't exactly seem to be showing up in, for instance, the bereavement/MC topics.
SO, once again, some of you might not like insulting posts, but plenty of peole don't give a fuck one way or another, and no one is acutally going to die from the odd insult, so why make such a fuss?

thedogsbollox - that is a good idea.

oo I do like the dogsbollox suggestion regarding name changing rights too.

I agree with those who say that it is a bad idea. You often stumble on here because you have a problem you need help with. And I am sorry but I just don't think people do really search the archives and you want your particular question answered.

And peachy, I completely agree with you. I think people's argument carries loads more weight if they don't resort to abuse. I am much more likely to change my mind on something if it put across in a reasoned manner rather than being screamed at in a banshee like manner. How on earth do they think that is constructive?

Like Seamonster, I joined because of a specific concern (the fear I might have to strangle teenage DD ), and then stayed around - at the time I was pretty desperate for advice and really didn't know where to turn. I had no idea about MN etiquette and realised subsequently that I'd completely hijacked someone else's thread - they took it very well, thankfully. So no to the 7 day's rule - a lot of "this is my 1st post"-type posts are people wanting advice, rather than a chat, and they want advice NOW, not in a week.

I disagree with the OP. THe reason being is that when i found mumsnet I was in need of support and was going through a difficult time. Mumsnet allowed me to talk about these confidentialy. If I had to wait 7 days I probably wouldnt have posted on this site. Mumsnet is there as a support for mums and dads and that is what makes it special. All sites get trolls etc, part of internet i guess. We have a choice as to wether to ignore threads and not respond to posters. If you really think someone has signed up to cause trouble, avoid them.

Also the point of the advice being needed being urgent therefore requiring professional advice doesnt work when it is late at night and the person cant sleep and is really upset and troubled and just need to let it out.