Civility - what we should and shouldn't allow

Throughly agree smiley, holysmoke deeming something pathetic is pathetic. Will defend the cunting sainsburys thread all the way.

MTP great post (I think )

I really don't think anythiong should be banned, but fail to see why we can't take it upon ourselves to try (just in the titles after all) to try to be mindful of others personal feelings.

how hard would it have been (accepting this one was alcohol related and dont we all have our moments...) to have said:

@I really think Gordon Brown is a.... ? Or Gordon Brown is a $%^& and I need a rant about him?

Surely respecting others is part of being a thread for intelligent woman?

Peachy - sorry if I made it sound like you should clear off if you don't like swearing. I personally don't swear on threads (exception below - it felt very strange typing it!) but it would not stop me from reading a thread with swearing - in the same way that a drama on TV might use words that I don't like/use. I don't like unimaginative use of swear words when you can't think of anything else to say, but I don't think you can ban people from using them, all you can do is ask for consideration when posting a thread title (though most people would probably not read/consider a reminder anyway unless it was flashing in big 6 foot green letters)

Pathetic? How?

i really wanted to contribute to this but my tiny mind is unable to sort itself out!!

i object to the idea that you cannot freely express your opinion. however, i also think that opinion on a topic should not lead to a personal attack. but is that a contradiction? isn't freedom of opinion also the freedom to have and to express the opinion that someone is a %#$$~£$>; ?? then i also think that people are entitled to be heard and to have their viewpoint respected by others, even if you don't agree with it, and it's good to debate, but not to slag each other off. understand and respect the difference between the opinion and the person - but is there really a difference? you opinions are who you are, so if i think your opinion is wrong or daft??? .... and i go round in circles!

i do think we should all show each other more respect and courtesy. stop using the pc as a shield and, basically, if you wouldn't say it to my face, don't say it to my screen!! it being 'liberating to be able to be so honest' is just saying it's great to be able to be rude to people without the risk of them punching me!

perhaps if we all started seeing it differently and classed rudeness up there with sausage rolls, fruit shoots and burberry??

Personal attacks a differnt matter. I think NQC point earlier about comments about poeple who are not here to defend themselves should maybe be considered differently.

I personally have no objections to individual personal comments about celebs, but when it becomes a reoccuring running joke with the 'crowd' involved, it does feel more insidious and harmful.

Not sure how you'd ploice that though.

I see what you mean SP but if that's the case, it's a little bit pathetic at the same time.

Hmm tricky. Don't like to see personal attacks in thread title whoever they are aimed at, but then again, quite capable of just not reading them if I don't want to. However, I really, really don't like to see that level of profanities in a thread title. Apart from thinking it just isn't necessary, as someone who has mumsnet on in the background and flits in and out, my children are frequently in the room (I am a Mum after all ), if they come to talk to me I have to remember its in active convos and quickly move off the screen.

I quite like all the swaering.

I very rarely swear in RL, as usually kids about, or at work (apparently it's not professional)or something. On here there's a feeling of mums leeting loose a bit, loosing the respectable mummy persona foe a while.

That's why 'cunting sainburys' was so funny.

I'd never say that in RL, but might well feel that sentimemnt.

The swearing is getting tedious and so is the 'don't be prudish/don't be prissy' response to those who object to it.

Externally imposed censorship is a different issue, though, and not something I'd favour.

But why should I not be able to use Mn, given I have been on here since 2001 (ish) in one guise or another, because I don't like swearing in thread titles?

Surely people would prefer to restrict their language in thread titles? After all, this site is supposed to be diverse and open to a variety of opinions isn't it? isn't that half the point of it- people from all walks of life?

Why is it better to tell people to go away than to just modify a word very occasionally?

Housemum - I like what you are saying.

Enid - who is a fucking bitch?

Personal attacks is tricky - we should be open to say what we like, so long as it's clear it's your opinion. MN already has disclaimers to say that the opinions are that of its members.
The particular thread title did come across as an attack - if she had said, "I'm pissed but I think GB is a cocksucking twat, so who will lead the country" it would be in some ways less offensive as it's quite clear it's her opinion (though just as offensive if you don't like swearing, but if you don't want to see swearing, don't come on a chat site)

personally I didnt much like the title when I saw it, its easy to kkip thredds / withdraw if you dont like whats in them, but a bit too much swearing on the tile for this one I thought.

It doesnt happen often though, surely Mn could just put a note asking people to 'consider their thread titles when creating new threads' (much like the SWMNBN message) and that would do it? maybe not for posts from drunken women (as this one was)but I think it would cover the main.

It might also help cull a few of the more personal ones too.

LL, I read one of your examples as a teenager being set to fail wanking and I did wonder.

I don't have a view on the rest, really. Up to MN Towers, innit?

Tiscali chat have such filters

god she is isnt she (a fucking bitch)

glitterfairy is onto something here - that would be fine as long as you have to option to do it or not (would hate to not read 'cunting') but still not address the personal attacks thing. Is there a legal reson for persuing this?

disagree eemie - we will get all fluffybunkins if we go that route. Advise -okay but policing it - no way.

Perhaps what we actually need is a ban on stupid people?? (heehee, just stirring it...)

Cunting comes out as cing yes it does work. It can be annoying though as some pretty ridiculous things like pissed up a tree become ped up a tree but then some people are **al about these things!

Threads needn't be censored, but there has definitely been an increase in offensive titles recently. On many days a quick scan of active conversations is distinctly off-putting. I resented being faced with the 'pikey chavs' title every time I looked for a while. The swearing and personal attacks are starting to get me down. I come here looking for articulacy and wit. I'm not squeamish but have recently reported offensive posts for the first time in five years on MN.

So Justine, I applaud your decision and would welcome a stricter policy on thread titles.

ah, go on, who were you emkancin?
Thought you were a bit eloquent and witty for a newbie

It's completely bizarre. Last week i changed my name becuase i was called many names by many very regular posters for exactly this kind of thing. Now, like children who have found that saying swearwords offends ( Yawn, you are so slow) there is 'shit' in every title "look at me Justine, i just swearded, whatcha gonna do ner ner"