trolls, attention seekers and other wierdos.

out of curiosity, what is the mn name of foxy?

i was a newbie to mn when dottymums situation was being played out and i was in tears that someone was in the situation she was in. wwjd has come for a lot of slack for this thread and i for one am glad that things have been cleared up.

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Kezza - your post yesterday that dottymummy and fox/MR were 2 different people totally confused me as I had been told they were the same person. I tried searching for messages from Dottymummy but couldn't find anything.

It all begins to come clear now.

Thanks you for a very dignified post trying to clarify matters.

WWJD - I know you were very instrumental in trying to help this person and were trying to let MN know that things are not always what they seem - sorry you have been "got at".

WWJD is not trying to say that everyone who post on MN with problems/depression etc is "attention seeking". From one incident where she believed what she read/was told and acted accordingly - she then found out that things were not as they seemed and some things were not true.

We know there are trolls - we do need to beaware of this fact. However we don't need to assume every newbie is a troll.

We know there are people who we could call "attention seekers" - there always will be in every walk of life.

But - there are lots of people with genuine issues that they need support/advice or just to be able to vent/use MN as a sounding board. We need to be careful not to assume that every person with a problem/issue is either attention seeking or a troll and we also need to be careful about assuming everything we read on here is true.

Obviously Fox/MR/Dottymummy does need help - just possibly not the help that she led Kezza/WWJD/NurseyJo to believe she needed- but they couldn't know that at the time.

Again this showed the generosity of Mumsnetters lots of whom were willing to offer whatever help they could. It is a shame it has turned to be like this but I do still think that no-one should regret the help offered.

Sorry if i have waffled on!

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Thanks Mellowma, I am just so shocked that someone could be so plausible. Her dc's were lovely and I spent so much time and effort worrying about her.

I hope this doesnt stop genuine posters being belived but I am glad it is all out in the open now.

dotty has my address......mmmmm that wasnt a good idea was it!?

trolls are sweet little hairy creatures with big eyes leave them alone!

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Not aimed at you mellowma

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Bloody ridiculous and ott.Why can't we make our own minds up without this policing of the site .We are all gullible at times that is how we learn Chill!

There is no other update. This owman has serious issues. Yes she was not with her dh when I met her, but that is the only similarity.

I was going to pick her up from the airport, offered her a place to stay while she got her refuge place sorted as she had no money, and now she is back in the UK under her own steam and I have not heard from her.

I dont understand why she posted as someone else knowing I might see it, while at the same time getting help from me and spinning me other stories.

Someone else has managed to contact her family and I hope they can help her.

Can you all please stop getting at Jesus.

She has spent time, money and lots and lots of emotion on a situation that you know nothing about.

A situation that had people planning to break certain laws to help someone in a desperate situation.

A situation that had several MNers contacting the British Embassy (sorry I can't even spell it) the passport office, the police etc etc Not to mention the tears that were shed when e-mails/posts came through describing mortal danger, rape of said poster and the possible abandonment of tiny children.

WWJD is a very very genuine and lovely poster who I have spoken to personally, I am not suprised that she has posted this.

You have my number Jesus ring me if you want, sorry if I have spoken out of turn I just will not sit by and let people jump on you for NO reason.

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mellowma, can you forward the update to me?

jabberwocky dot 2006 at hotmail dot com

thanks!

I posted on here a year or so ago under a pseudoname with a VERY unusual but hideously upsetting situation - I had no-one else to turn to. I was accused of being a troll and it was very upsetting but there were some posters who offered a sympathetic ear. I wish I had been trolling and that it hadnt really happened.

I have deliberated over whether to post this, but seeing as WWJD is still getting a negative response to her post I have decided to go ahead.

Since my lst post yesterday where I defended dottymum I have spoken to some of those involved in the fox issue and it is the same person.

I have been conducting one "relationship" with dottymum under a completely different set of circumstances to the one being played out by fox or whatever she is now.

I know her as a different name with a slightly changed history, but everything else is the same - dc's names, dh's name, surname, country of dh etc. It is definately the same person.

I am not sure what is true and what isnt, but she has categorically told me that there is no dv happening, she is leaving her husband amicably, she asked me to helop with arrangements etc. I held her baby while she made flight arragements and I helped her pack her cases. She was totally plausible and I was well and truely had. Loads of other stuff about where she lived, how long she had been out of the marital home etc etc were different to the other story she told.

I can see now that WWJD was trying to warn everyone that this was a drama being played out by someone who has an attention seeking disorder, and although this deserves help in its own right, it is not the life or death situation we were all led to believe.

I do not want to be cryptic anymore as there isnt a need to be, and by giving veiled warnings it has just upset those who are genuine.

Dotty/MR/fox/katy whoever you are, I know you are back in the UK and I really hope you get help from your family. I feel proud of myself that I helped what I thought was a genuine person, and would do it again.

I am not even going to reread this or I will change my mind and not post. I just wanted to day do not judge WWJD on this, and if you do offer help or shelter to this person please bear in mind she has made up many stories and they are not true.

I guess I will find out soon enough if posting this has been a good idea or not.

I have a rather dramatic sounding story, I was also called a troll when i first joined MN.

At the end of the day if someone is in a tricky situation that they feel they cannot find help via "normal" means they will spend hours searching the net trying to find some nugget of great advice, so in that respect i can fully understand posters who post on MN (particularly after all our recent publicity) about something in their life as their first post.

ALl this TROLL schouting will soon make MN a place where youhave to pass a memntal health test prior to your first post.

I agree that there are some posters who have duped people for a long time and have left a rather bad taste in people's mouths but the vast majority are harmless and all that it costs is a few moments of typed advice that, if they don't help that person will almost certainly be of help to someone else in that situation too afraid to post about it.

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i don't get the irony? sorry qp