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Original poster

I'm not actually Jeffrey because

592 replies

HoneyDragon · 19/08/2015 23:23

In the interests of putting rest the suspicion and paranoia amongst us.
Especially as many of us will be newbies again I feel we should all (including MNHQ) prove we're not Jeffrey. By posting something our Jeffrey just wouldn't do, but a Mnetter would.

It won't take long and it's for the greater good.

I shall begin

I'm not actually Jeffrey because I steal toilet brushes from Centerparcs.

Right, who's up next?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
OutToGetYou · 20/08/2015 01:10

I'm not Jeffrey cos I buy naice ham and I double-cleanse!

Solo · 20/08/2015 01:08

I am not Jeffrey because I leave used wine glasses on my neighbours draining board when they are out.

HannaCotta · 20/08/2015 01:06

I'm not Jeffrey because I'm far too busy having all of my dreams come true at LIDL.

honeybuffe · 20/08/2015 01:05

AIBU to tell you that I'm not Jeffrey?

TheySayIamparanoid · 20/08/2015 00:52

I'm not Jeffrey because I'm wondering if I should change the sheets every day till my fake footner has finished flaking my feet.

BrideOfWankenstein · 20/08/2015 00:48

I'm not Jeffrey because I know the difference between vulva and vagina, but still call my privates fanjo. Grin

MadHackedOffGnome · 20/08/2015 00:43

I'm not Jeffrey because he wouldn't hand bicycles out to his builders when they were weeping in the bushes.

duckyneedsaclean · 20/08/2015 00:38

I'm not Jeffrey because I think it makes total sense to clean skid marks off with my hands rather than risk keeping an implement for the task in my lovely germ free home.

-conveniently forgets my hands stay in said home-

JeffreySucksZippysBetter · 20/08/2015 00:37

I'm not Jeffrey because I store my bedding in a pillowcase

If I was called Jeffrey, no doubt I'd be having my mum chisel the sheets and wanksocks off the bed, on a bi-annual basis, having discovered my vair erotic crusty Facebook picture of Simon, wedged lovingly between the pages of HackingTwat magazine.

AndNowItsSeven · 20/08/2015 00:36

I am not Jeffrey because I rinse my mince.

sugar21 · 20/08/2015 00:35

I am not Jeffrey because I hate the poo particles a Mnetters OH left on the sofa as he only wore a T shirt after showering.
Jeffrey does not shower he does use the T shirt though Hmm

madwomanbackintheattic · 20/08/2015 00:34

Oh god, is hamwidge in classics? I must go look.
kk

I am not Jeffrey but the large green bird trapped in my kitchen might be.

MyEvenNewerAccount · 20/08/2015 00:33

haha, hamwidge was funny Grin

Bragadocia · 20/08/2015 00:31

I am not Jeffrey because Jeffrey, for example, is a twat.

msgrinch · 20/08/2015 00:30

giddy yes. I have your back.

OneLittleLady · 20/08/2015 00:29

I am definitely not jeffery because I have a blue bumhole and i'm the yoni one for all your beaker needs

BoreOfWhabylon · 20/08/2015 00:28

Hamwidge:

bread

ham

bread

kk

(proof positive that I am not Jeffrey)

SiobhanSharpe · 20/08/2015 00:27

Holy shet, Giddy. Totally.

GooodMythicalMorning · 20/08/2015 00:27

Im not Jeffrey as I know about hedgehog cam and also the cube of poo...

GiddyOnZackHunt · 20/08/2015 00:23

Ooh Dawn I'll pm you tomorrow (today) re hut number!

GiddyOnZackHunt · 20/08/2015 00:21

Siobhan well..like..yah..because it could be like MumsNotJeffrey instead of Mumsnet...like branding..rebranding..Twitter...OK..yah..

BlueNoon100 · 20/08/2015 00:21

*unplugged

Dawndonnaagain · 20/08/2015 00:19

I'm not Jeffrey because I know all about Sharon, wasps and wine.

GiddyOnZackHunt · 20/08/2015 00:18

:) grinchy We can vouch for each other when the Feds come knocking.

SiobhanSharpe · 20/08/2015 00:18

Nope. You've lost me. Dunno what's going on. But I'm pretty sure I'm not Jeffrey because, well just because. Will that do?