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Original poster

I'm not actually Jeffrey because

592 replies

HoneyDragon · 19/08/2015 23:23

In the interests of putting rest the suspicion and paranoia amongst us.
Especially as many of us will be newbies again I feel we should all (including MNHQ) prove we're not Jeffrey. By posting something our Jeffrey just wouldn't do, but a Mnetter would.

It won't take long and it's for the greater good.

I shall begin

I'm not actually Jeffrey because I steal toilet brushes from Centerparcs.

Right, who's up next?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
microferret · 20/08/2015 13:00

Whoops, I've just realised that my post wasn't actually referencing anything I've seen on here, it was just something which I felt a lot of women (okay, a few) might relate to. I haven't been here long enough to have got it to be fluent in MNspeak.
Nevertheless, I'm not Jeffrey.

microferret · 20/08/2015 12:57

I'm not Jeffrey because my nipples squirt milk when I see a nice piece of furniture that I covet or hear a ferry sounding its foghorn.

Tiggeryoubastard · 20/08/2015 12:57

Je Suis Jeff oh bugger I missed the brief;
I'm not Jeffrey because
I AM SPARTACUS

BlackeyedSusan · 20/08/2015 12:54

never mind blue, my dd turned herself red, yellow and green as well as blue...

[honey is a lightweight] emotion. never immaced them though

PeanutsOnTheFloor · 20/08/2015 12:46

Sorry to go OT, but can anyone recommend a stylish, waterproof, warm winter coat that will cover my bottom?

Grin
ToastedStoat · 20/08/2015 12:40

I'm not Jeffrey because I want to know what was in the locked garage. And I've seen a weebling pillowcase!

BrianCoxReborn · 20/08/2015 12:23

Which is not Jeffery

BrianCoxReborn · 20/08/2015 12:22

I'm not Jeffrey because I've decided to dereg my old account and rereg using a homage to an old NN I had. Which is Jeffrey.

Also, I'm not a massive woman-hating cockwomble.

MrSlant · 20/08/2015 12:20

I am not Jeffrey because I eat red Lego.

For Science.

FarelyKnuts · 20/08/2015 12:19

Is anyone else reading all these and going "fuck I know every one of these references, I spend waaaay to much time in here?" Shock

IPokeBadgers · 20/08/2015 12:19

Apologies, I have not RTFT but I am not Jeffrey cos I am Angela Hernandez Grin

Also, i love a tiny wanker!

SaskiaRembrandtWasFramed · 20/08/2015 12:10

Also, I know that the Great Orange One RRRLHK.

flanjabelle · 20/08/2015 12:08

I'm not Jeffrey because I have the urge to smash cakes in Tesco.

StrumpersPlunkett · 20/08/2015 11:50

I'm not Jeffrey cos I won't have twigs and pebbly shit in my house!

EeyoresTail · 20/08/2015 11:48

I'm not Jeffrey because I ate an artisan scotch egg Shock Grin

SaskiaRembrandtWasFramed · 20/08/2015 11:46

I'm not Jeffrey, I'm Gabby Loggon.

Teladi · 20/08/2015 11:44

I'm not Jeffrey because Jeffrey, for example, is a twat.

LimitedSedition · 20/08/2015 11:41

I'm not Jeffrey because I once got told off by Val for carrying a kitten under my arm. Like a handbag.

Haffdonga · 20/08/2015 11:38

Mooncup.

JeffreysMummyisCross · 20/08/2015 11:35

I'm not Jeffrey because Jeffrey is my MIL. I married her little boy and then posted on AIBU about her dramatics. And now she is getting her revenge on all of you for helping me deal with her narc behaviour.

MrsFrancisUnderwear · 20/08/2015 11:30

I might be Jeffrey because I have a brown leather settee.

CatthiefKeith · 20/08/2015 11:25

I'm no Jeffrey because I have a Mumsnet Labrador (But I have never rimmed her!) Grin

Trebushay · 20/08/2015 11:23

I am not Jeffery as I love lemon drizzle cake and once had an affair with a policeman in Switzerland

LittleBearPad · 20/08/2015 11:19

I'm not Jeffrey because I don't have a fucking clue what my password is anymore.

Cockbollocks · 20/08/2015 11:15

I am not Jeffrey because i know the name of 'she who must not be named'

&

The difference between the Klaxons