Has Mumsnet dumbed down over the past couple of years IYO? Or, if you're new, what's your impression?

'Just hope you all remember all this when your daughters don't want to know you in future years. Grow up.'

'Some of your children may not forgive you in the future for being prevented from having a relationship with their grandparents.'

Both by Cam. First was abrasive and unsupportive, second was just horrible when Pages was tormented by her relationship with her mother. She had already said IIRC that she wasn't intending to stop her mother seeing her dd.

I've never told anyone, ever, to "get a life"

Not my style.

And, if I prove WWW's point, I must have dumbed the site down 4 years ago, not recently. However, dumb is not a word I would use about myself thanks.

For Goodness' sake - 'bullying'. You called me rude, I called you rude. End of story. 'You still talking, I'm not listening' is rude.

I seem to recall that you told Pages to 'get a life' when she was distraught over her mother. That seems like bullying behaviour to me.

Listen. I think we are never going to see eye to eye. I tried to be polite/fair to you on Pages' thread because I remembered you had been on MN for quite a while and that I had never been offended by any of your posts before. You were abrasive. I take objection to being told I am a bully. Rude, maybe but not a bully.

I think we just rub each other up the wrong way and I am sorry for that as I hate having spats on here. Can we just agree to ignore each other?

oy, you squabblers (is that a word?)

I don't remember the self help book - I do remember the mother thread. Didn't think CAM's first post was that bad (was her opinion after all) - it just all snowballed after her post.

Proves www's point

Now leave me alone and stop bullying me

No, you're not rude at all...

I get fed up with all the 'lets congratulate eachother on how educated, witty and charming we are' that goes on. Its the constant backslapping of others which i think can mke MN very difficult for newbies. That said i agree with Jools in that manners are sometimes in short supply, often uneccesarily so and this I would say does contribute to the 'dumbing down'.
In all though i hate the 'oh it used to be so middle class on here darling' attitudes and think MN is better off with more variety, itmakes for better insight and debate.

Oh are you still talking?

Sorry I've stopped listening.

And that is my opinion. You are, of course entitled to think me rude too.

Sorry, but I thought you were incredibly rude to the person who posted about the self-help book. Obviously you didn't, but I wasn't the only one who thought so. I only posted the comment on this thread because I thought you were trying to make a point. If you weren't, I apologise. If you were, I stand by what I said. Sorry, but I (and others) thought you were unsupportive.

How appallingly rude of you, Dior.

I completely disagree that I was unsupportive, abrasive and confrontational.

I stand by my right to disagree with any post and not be told to "disappear" as you so charmingly put it.

No, but Cam, you were very offensive on one thread (Pages - my mother) and that is why you were told to disappear. You were unsupportive, abrasive and confrontational. In theory, I do agree with you though.

I have found it very varied and useful..however..when you post a messagethat seems to require a little more political knowledge for example, i have found people have ignored these messages and responded to less challenging ones...eg on a thread about Jack Straw..my message was ignored ..admittedly..it di go on a little about the history of some politacal moves ...but still!

The only thing I find offensive on m/net is when someone disagrees with an op and a gang tell the disagreer not to post on the thread.

Basically the same thing that www finds offensive.

There is no such thing as "my" thread.

MI, I remember that well, particularly as I don't think I've ever seen you post anything in pissed off mode (well not due to MN anyway).

I said earlier on that there does seem to be a bit of 'attitude' around lately. I'll even go as far to say a bit of intellectual bullying/showing off, ott PC views combined with a bit of cliqueyness.

And that applies to old and new members alike imo. Lone voices/dissenters seem an unsual feature of MN these days.

(I think I've managed to criticise everyone on MN with the above!)

Zippi has an interesting point about the "nastiness" often coming from older posters/well known posters. Are they themselves both the problem and ironically the same ones feeling that there is a problem? dunno personally but interesting idea.

I hate text speak too. It reads so badly and being a judgemental cynical soul, it always sounds like a 14 yr old boy trolling

I agree about the judgemental aspect but last time I posted to that effect I was Severely Told Off.

actually i think a lot of the unpleasant wrangling is among people who have been here for ages

I think it has got dumber - I joined in about 2002, and the average length of each post seemed a lot longer, and more structured somehow. I think the size of the site has contributed to this, and the chat topic did change it a lot.

That's not necessarily bad - I don't always discuss topics earnestly with my friends - we have a laugh, chat about men etc - but I do think it's different to how it was!

think I've been here about 2 years and personally I think it goes through phases where it gets a bit mad-eyed and shouty and people just leap to judge. And then it gets nice and friendly again. There's a bit of a nasty new vs. old thing at the moment prob cos all the nobody publicity created a big rise in users. I hope it'll settle.

tbh tho we're the only ones who can change it. Maybe a MN pact to ignore the judgemental leaps and bounds?

I've been on here 2 years and I think the bright, funny people do still stick out. I wouldn't agree with the dumbing down, but I do think there is a vein of judgementalness that wasn't so pronounced before and that certainly could be perceived as rather offputting. As far as the subjects that come round again and again go, it's in the nature of a site like this. I lurk on another forum in which the general rule is to respond to any newbie with a question with a (rather rudely expressed) request to go and exhaust the search function before coming back. It would be a shame if MN ended up like this. One of the things that impresses me most about MN - and that I don't think has changed really - is the sheer amount of time and energy people who know a lot about a particular area put into answering queries (Thomcat, tiktok and Jimjams spring to mind, but there are plenty of others). I've unfortunately become a bit of an expert on miscarriage, so I aklways keep an eye out for threads in that topic I can help on.

yes it does scare people off. as a new poster i know it often takes a lot of courage to post and even more to start a thread. often i get ignored, but i'm used to it. i guess it takes a while before people think you're worth talking to.

I totally agree re the complete over-playing of a point sometimes. I remember the thread where somebody posted a lovely picture of their daughter but unfortunately used the word 'sexy' in the title. The poor woman!! Gawd, it went on for hours. It scares pple off.......I do really dislike that sometimes, but maybe its just the 'herd' attitude as some have said and everyone wants to make a point, regardless of whether its been said before. Very rude tho really.

jolly good diseb