The lady whose waters broke at 18 weeks ...

Oh Royal It's terrible isn't it :( I'm sorry about your Daughter. It's clear from the way you talk about her that you loved her very much and I'm sure every decision you made was born of that.

There really is no place in medicine for people who lack hope, or kindness.

methe we too had awful negTivity with our DD. Her original Dr would say to us she is doing as well as expect ex for her gestation, which was reassuring. She was in a "normal" condition. He went on a rotation after 3 days and we got Dr doom and gloom as a replacement. She had nothing good to say. All day the nurses would tell us her blood gases were good and she just had to grow. We kept hearing conflicting results and didn't know what to think. If felt like they just wanted rid of her. Dr said she was the sickest baby in the unit of 150 beds. The day she died, she had a collapsed lung which managed to reinflate. Her Dr still had nothing but bAd news for us and we were wavering on the decision to stop her care. We ended up doing that and her Dr said she would only last a couple of minutes as she was so small and poorly. Our poor DD lasted 40mins breathing on her own. She was so strong and her dr was wrong. I beat myself up that if we had her original Dr still on the cAse we would have had support and felt more confident to give her more time

It's a decision that will haunt me for the rest of my life.

Wow I'm I never thought troll for 1 second. Has this definitely been confirmed ???

I did say IME and everyone is different. It makes perfect sense to me. Very few of the HCPs I dealt with had an iota of hope for my sons prognoses. One vile midwife, who should have been in a differently job entirely, asked while administering my second steroid shot " you do know this babies likely to die, don't you?". Bitch.

I'd rather be looked after by a person who could at the very least be pragmatic as opposed to the absolute negativity we experienced.

As I said, I've been though this 3 times. I am entitled to my own opinions without being told they "don't make sense"

I think it's awful that someone can carry that story on for so long and doing it for attention!

Slightly off topic but is nobblys banned now then? Otherwise she could just name change and be writing on this thread! Or any other thread....

I've re-read that and realise it might be a bit upsetting. I'm sorry if it is :(

When I said my 3 pproms - 2 survived and 1 didn't. We didn't do anything differently. It really is just luck.

I just wanted to out out there that nobblys story, while unlikely, was possible.

It is certainly possible to stay pregnant for a long time post pprom and have a good outcome at the end of it. I know people who have ppromed at 16 weeks and have surviving children

My own 22wk pprom was born after an abruption at 27+5, a good weight, a nice colour and with apgar scores of 8,9 and 9. Prior to his birth we were told he was almost certain to die as my AFI had been 0 since the initial pprom and his lungs couldn't develop (pulmonary hypoplasia). When he was born he didn't even require ventilation (7 weeks of cpap and a couple more with supplementary oxygen). He was 6 yesterday.

HCPs are the worst people to speak to about it Ime. They see far more bad outcomes that good and are trained to be naturally pessimistic. Also I found that during my 3rd pprom pregnancy I knew more about the situation than they did - much to their displeasure.

I just thought I'd post again as all the too good to be true posts are a little unfair and will be horrible to read for anyone going though it.

Survival with early pproms isn't common, sadly most very early pprom babies will die but it is certainly possible. It's down to luck.

Premature babies are always vulnerable but they are quite often born looking remarkably robust and healthy too. I don't think it's possible to tell anything from a photo.

Theyvall, having been through this myself I thought it was plausible, hence my post (or two, I can't remember). I don't even know what hypoplasia is to be honest so unless it was something that was explained to me in layman terms instead I am not sure I came across it.

Thing is that I don't often post about really personal things so posting my story on here was a big deal for me and I only did it because I thought a positive story would have helped me during what were very dark days.

Certainly makes me less inclined to share although I still doubt that I will ever notice a troll.

to those who lost babies to pPROM, or are questioning themselves, their treatment or approach.

So sorry that this thread is making people question their choices, that is absolutely horrid and if the troll happens to read this I hope that he/she is utterly ashamed.

I had pprom, incompetent cervix and a blood disorder at 19 weeks, hence the reason I tried to offer Nobbly some support on her thread.

Not in England though at the time, admitted into hospital on upside down bed rest for the first 20 days and then bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy. I made it to 29 weeks. Lots of drugs which made me so poorly I didn't make it to the NICU for three days during which point we were told that our baby might not make it. She did.

We were very very fortunate, my consultant used the word miracle, but the journey, six months away from home, the years it took my child to get over her early birth (still has a serious health issue) was no picnic (Nobbly).

to all.

Works am sorry you felt you couldn't get support on mumsnet. So sorry for your loss.
And Royal so sorry for your loss also.

Oh, Royal, my heart goes out to you. I understand how you feel completely. If you want to talk about it at all, do PM me.

Like you, I read the thread and wondered why my experience seemed so different from the op's experience.

That thread made me wonder whether my attitude to what was happening was wrong and misguided. We were told, in pretty stark terms, that the prognosis in our case was very poor, and I have since learnt that this approach is in the official NHS guidelines for pprom at a pre-viability gestational age.

But the op on that thread seemed so upbeat in a way, and it confused me -- I was just living in a kind of blank state of shock in between trying (and failing) to do research on the topic (I since found out that I would have been more successful had I used different search terms). I also couldn't understand why she wasn't concerned about severe hypoplasia.

You know what the ultimate joke is though? I didn't post a thread about my pprom on mumsnet because I thought it might look as though I was a troll or trying to piggyback on her thread -- and I didn't want to upset anyone.

works I'm so sorry you've suffered the same as well.

Like you mine went about 20wks and I only lasted another 3 weeks. I was getting upset to think someone went 10wks with this wondering what I did wrong. But my consultant said at the appointment when I found out that it was t the end and some can go a long time with this problem. I guess for me I had the placenta problem as well and DD had to be born when she was as she was in distress.

Awful that is has affected and hurt so many people.

Beyond frightening to think that someone doing it could actually be a parent.

It makes me so suspicious and dubious about posting on such serious threads.

I feel sickened about this. I read that thread so many times as it was active while I was in hospital after a pprom at 20 weeks (I did not post about it).

I am also very hurt because the thread made me doubt whether whether my OH and I were not receiving the right kind of care or advice from the consultants, or that we were making the wrong decisions, or that we were not being demanding enough about what could be done.

It was also so confusing because we were being told that there was very little chance our baby could possibly survive after a pprom at 20 weeks, and this was backed up by stories on the inkan site and the latest medical research statistics. But here was this thread about a pprom at 18 weeks and the baby was seemingly surviving to the point of prem viability.

Why would anyone make something like that up? They cannot possibly have any idea what it is like to be in such a situation.

Looking back at what I remember from the thread, in hindsight, knowing what I now know from my own pprom experience, what the op said now seems a little peculiar. It all seemed a little too dramatic.

I am on the one hand relieved on another annoyed. I followed the post and thought after the birth the lack of updates meant a sad conclusion.

The bit that angers me most though is that was a picture of someones baby who was poorly

Absolutely shocked and disgusted. I was following that post and hoping so much that baby was ok.

Why would you do that??

I posted on that thread too in the run up to the birth ... then wondered why a baby who had such low fluid for 10 weeks was actually such a great size and colour ... The baby in the picture was definitely older than 28 weeks gestation and nearer term!

My career is in Behaviour analysis. I really want to know what motivates people to do these things, especially those who go through various extremes in their lies. Attention? Money? What was the point of the lady who faked a stillbirth and asked people to donate to SANDS? She wasn't benefiting, or was she??

Sorry to hear about your DD Royal.

There's lots of reasons people troll but it's never harmless imo.

royal so fucking sad for you. You're such a wonderful person.