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Original poster

Child care for 12 yr old?

33 replies

schroeder · 15/05/2010 09:28

My manager asked me recently if I would be interested in a post that includes a finish time of 7pm. If I did this what could I do with ds(12) after school?
What do other people do?

OP posts:
cory · 15/05/2010 10:20

Dd (13) does this when I work late and was when she was 12: in fact, Social Services (involved re health problems) looked very when she told them she still goes to a childminder twice a week; they seemed to think I was babying her (really only for practical reasons involving disabled transport) and that she needed to be more independent.

I would trust my nearly 10yo with heating himself some food in the microwave. He did try to boil milk in the kettle the other day (my fault for note explaining properly) and reacted very sensibly, switching it off and unplugging it when it started smelling. Imo it's not so much about whether they could get something wrong (kettle mistake was one I could have made when I moved to this country as a 29yo) but whether they will react sensibly when things do go wrong. So I found ds's kettle disaster very reassuring.

purepurple · 15/05/2010 10:18

Both of mine have come home to an empty house when they started high school.
DD is 13 and is more than capable of coming home and cooking her tea.
The only incidents i have had are a really big phone bill from her phoning all her friends mobiles.
We made her pay it all back and have noe bought her a mobile from Tesco on contract for £10 a month that includes free minutes and texts
The other problem was friends coming back and having free rein of the house.
I have banned certain friends from the house.
Only you will know if your DS can cope with being on his own.
If you do it, set some ground rules first.

Original poster
schroeder · 15/05/2010 10:17

He will be 12 in September.

OP posts:
PuppyMonkey · 15/05/2010 10:13

Your 12 yo is at primary school???

We've been letting our dd stay at home alone since last year (she's 13 now) and so far she hasn't burnt house down or anything. She sometimes pops to neighbours instead if she's feeling lonely, they are cool with that. She makes herself what she calls a picnic tea, with sandwiches and fruit and stuff, as she has school dinners anyway so not ravenously hungry. Otherwise, she does what any normal teen does and goes straight on MSN/Facebook until we get home.

There is also the key worry.... can you trust him with it?

Original poster
schroeder · 15/05/2010 10:02

We live in a nice town, ds would come home on the bus. He isn't very mature really, but he currently walks himself to primary school each day and he goes by himself to the shops and out on his bike.
The thing that worries me is 3hrs at home alone and of course he would need to eat. He can of course make something for himself, but I think he would panic if he burnt the toast or whatever.
I would be really interested to know what other parents do with their 12 yr olds re childcare please.

OP posts:
TanteRose · 15/05/2010 09:42

agree with the others - probably would be OK on his own, IF he was OK with it.

The worst thing would be if he was not confident, as that is when accidents happen/things go awry.

overmydeadbody · 15/05/2010 09:33

Depending on your child, how far you live from hschoo, and what area you live in I'd suggest a 12 yr old is old enough to look after themselves for a few hours a day.

mumblechum · 15/05/2010 09:31

Few questions before I can advise:

  1. What sort of place do you live in, ie rural/suburban with nice neighbours & willing teenagers/urban with high crime?
  1. How mature is your ds and how would he feel about being alone for 3 hours?
  1. How will he get home, esp if doing after school activities?