Oh! Oh! My firstborn starts secondary school in September. Surely that warrants a support thread?

My dd knows how to
cross roads, she does cross them on her own but mainly when I'm there. When she goes to the local shop, she has to cross 2 side streets. It doesn't stop ne from worrying though.

I need to pick what I consider to be the safest route and stick to it. Best get started with teaching her the route today, less than a week to go!

ds2 just rolls his eyes now when I talk about being organised. I think he'll be OK though - I was more worried about ds1 (space cadet), and he was 100% fine.

My boys have always had quite a lot of freedom and are well used to finding their way around independently. ds2 has been walking (0.6 m) to school alone since he was 7 or 8 (including crossing roads).

I'm a bit about children who've not had the opportunity to develop road sense and so on by this age.

For ds1 the change to subject specialist teachers had a dramatic effect on his learning and - along with setting for academic subjects - is definitely worth the challenges of a large (7-form entry) school.

DD2 definitely wants to get started, she's ready for the challenge academically but having seen how different DD1 has become since starting secondary, she is a bit scared of the emotional side/peer pressure/fitting in, particularly as only one of her friends is going to the same school.

I agree. Ds can't wait for the academic side of things to get going (he has a lab coat which he thinks bodes well), but travel is something else. He uses public transport regularly but always with me or dh. He has a London train ride and then a walk. I am sure it will be fine once he's actually doing it - as Roisin says, loads of kids going the same way in the same kit.

My dd was in tears last night saying she just wanted to go back to primary school. I said every single kid going up to year 7 will have said that some time these holidays. She cheered up a bit then.

Travel's a worry though.

Yes the travel worries are temporary, just until they get the hang of it, but the organisational stuff, oh dear. DD2 has always been totally chaotic. DD1 spent a whole day in her room with her last week, sorting things out and tidying up. She told her "you'll never manage if you don't keep your things tidy" at which DD2 looked horrified.

Kid -definitely make time to do the journey a few times. Starting secondary school can be difficult enough, but if there is the fear of getting lost/being late.....
Ds has a 15 minute bus journey, and has done it about 10 times, simply enjoying hopping on and off the bus. Simple pleasures!
He has gone into town today to get dad's birthday present....and probably sneak a milk shake in too.
I love the fact that they have freedom with their bus passes - dd will happily spend all day going round the area on the bus, and has an indepth knowledge of SW London bus routes now.

Miso and Oncemai, of course, you're both right. Kids develop different things at different speeds - physically, intellectually and emotionally. They learn different things at different ages too; a little boy (aged 7 I believe) got an A* at GCSE maths the other day. The whole concept of school as a sort of age-related sausage machine is really no way to run a system of education. We need to ask, first of all, 'what is education for?' (not 'what are schools for?'). Then we can design a system that caters for the individual needs and stage of deveopment that suits every unique child.

I'm suffering no angst bar the realisation that the chubby little baby i brought home from hospital, the cute little reception boy whose cheeks I want to squeeze has grown up enough to go to secondary school. where he will have a fabulous time and about which I am actually very excited.

however, I am not excited about the amount of label sewing I have had to do :o Or the fact that I have lost his 11-15 Oyster card by putting it in A Safe Place.

Why all the angst. Our daughter starts secondary school on 6th September. She is more than ready to move on and more than capable of travelling three stops on the tube to get there. Roll on specialist subject teaching and raising the bar. It's time to grow up. Both her great grandfathers started work on their 14th birthdays!!

Grandpa, I guess it depends on the child - DD was at a one form entry primary school & found the last year or so pretty stifling (more socially than academically)- she can't wait to move up to big school!

Having said that, I grew up with infants / middle school / upper school which I feel is a much more natural progression, & would probably have suited DD better too.

Mind you, 2 rounds of admissions instead of one would just about do me in, I think.

Kid, I understand your apprehension! If she is little it makes it so much worse (for you, that is ).

As you say, the only thing to do is to do the journey with her several times so she is more confident.

Ds has now announced that he wants to go to school on the bus and has asked me to show him how (even bigger ). This journey will involve a walk to the bus stop, getting on any bus, and getting off after 2 stops. By the way the buses have automatic announcements and at the stop where he needs to get off it actually says the name of the school. Not exactly complicated......
Why won't he just walk?

Good thinking about the school bus, SoupDragon.

With all this angst about moving from primary to secondary school for both mums and children, have we ever stopped to ask why children are obliged to leave a small friendly school where the kids all know each other and the teachers know all the kids (and most of their parents), to a large, impersonal, scary place full of much larger kids they don't know - and often a long way from home; and all this just as their brains are going through an enormous development?

I got round the whole travel to school worry by booking DS onto the school bus :)

Getting to school is a scary business (for parents, anyway)

kid - is there anyone she could travel with? Anyone else local going to the same school?

DD2 has to take two buses, involving a change at the big changeover stop in the city centre. DD1 does the same journey (the 2 schools are in the same street, coincidentally) but they won't necessarily start at the same time and they definitely don't finish at the same time so she will be on her own mostly. She says she is more nervous about the buses than she is about school!

there aren't any buses that go that way. There are a few routes she could take but I haven't worked out which is the safest option. She will have to walk close to or pass another secondary school to get to her one.

She is so tiny, she doesn't even go out without us. She plays out with friends and goes to the local shop on her own (its very local!) but thats it.

I think we will have to do lots of walking to and from the schoo between now and the 5th sept. I'll let her lead the way and just keep right back.

She is sensible so I shouldn't worry really, but I just know I will. There are a few roads she will have to cross with no zebra crossing or traffic lights, those are the ones I will worry about.
Arghh, why can't she just go back to reception again until I am ready to let her go big school?

Does she have a very long way to go kid?
dh took ds2 on the bus for his first induction day, but for the second he went on his own and was fine.

There are always other children heading in the same direction in the same uniform, so it's not like they'll get lost.

And anyway finding a parent's car in the melee at the end of school can be far harder than finding the bus stop or finding the route home!

My PFB is starting secondary school in 8 days. I haven't even got all of her uniform yet let alone started labelling anything.

She is meant to be practising the route to and from school during the holiday so she is confident with it. But so far, we haven't done it at all. God, what am I going to do when she has to go all be herself
I'll be at work so can't really take her. Could drop her at someones house that lives closer, or drop her near the school so she is early but not too early. My way of dealing with it was not to think about it. But time is running out and now I will have to think about it and actually arrange something.

Her first day is sorted, DH has the day off and will take her and collect her.

:) I'm hoping DS gets covered in mud so that no one can see his name tapes. particularly the ones I have to sew visibly on his sodding socks as I fear they aren't going to go well.

"You have to buy special woven nametape which then must be sewn on kit as per the bl**dy diagram provided.

And the special name tapes have to be on the outside so everyone can see what sewing skills your mother (or other relative/paid help) has."

PMSL at this! Ha ha ha!

ds1 (13 now) was terrified of rugby too. After his first real match at school I asked how it had gone and commented on how clean his kit was. He said "it was OK actually. I managed to stay out of the way of the ball the whole time!"

My sewing skills will be tested to their limit tonight - I have to sew ribbons and elastic onto DD's first pair of pointe shoes for ballet. DD is nervous

Oooh, and Citrus too I see

dinosaur, you are not alone, DS can't tie his either. We've managed to find everyday shoes with velcro straps (after watching him grapple with laces for half of the last school year, then slip his shoes on for the rest), but god only knows how long it'll take him to get his football boots on.

Poor boy, he really does try, he's a good lad.

He's terrified of the rugby too.