What are the Killer Questions to ask at Open Evenings to break through the guff?

Yes. Might do that with a namechange when been to Open days etc...

How to unpick teaching for different abilities? Obv my son is a GENIUS and we have options of a decent comp, some less decent but possibly 'happier' comps and out of county grammar (vv selective and vv long way away).

Really though, he is higher ability in maths and science in particular and is already doing lots of Y7 & 8 extension maths. How do I ask about this kind of stuff without sounding like a fecking nightmare parent?

Could always post on here too specifically about the school, to get parental, or even teacher, opinions.

Look for kids who are really engaged with Open Evening, too. Six of my year 10s did a 'Who is to blame for the death of Romeo & Juliet?' debate in character.

They were very good & super-enthusiastic, & the fact that they'd given up an evening to do it hopefully tells prospective parents that we have something worthwhile going on.

(Even if I did bribe them with Haribo & the promise of a corking Speaking & Listening Coursework grade!)

Brilliant questions, thanks. Especially good to hear from teachers who inevitably know how things really are.

Pump the child who takes you round for info

Find out/Ask staff if they would send their child there - as in definitely to mine, no way in hell to dh's.

And go round in the day when the students are in lessons.

Oh & go & find a teacher of a subject you loathed at school.

Say: 'I hated English/Maths/Geography! How do you teach it, because I'd like my dc to appreciate it more than I did?'

I always like those parents...gives you, as a teacher, a proper opportunity to 'sell' your subject.

& if they can't come up with any answers that make you wish they had taught the hated subject when you were at school - that's a worry.

"How do you get a balance between getting children to do their best and putting undue pressure on them?"

Produces some interesting answers, IME, both at primary and secondary.

"Are pupils allowed off the school site at lunchtime?" Whether the answer is Yes or No, "What is the rationale for that?"

Tbh I think Open Days/Evenings give you a surprisingly good insight into the vibe at the school, although I know some people are v. cynical. Check out the relationship between pupils and teachers in particular. Formality/informality is less important than warmth and respect.

"How do you choose students to show prospective parents round the school?" Some handpick the class swots, some let all Y9s loose on the job.

Look past the polish and feel the vibe. We felt that a hugely desirable school was actually oppressive and over-controlled, whereas a much rougher comp with disaffected kids hanging round the local tube station had quite a funky creative atmosphere inside.

"What would the school do if my 14/15yo started becoming disaffected with school and refused to work or co-operate with discipline?" might give you some insight into the school's pastoral and academic mentoring structure.

I suspect that if you asked those kind of questions on open evening, you wouldn't get the kind of answer you wanted - simply because open evenings tend to be all singin' all dancin' affairs which have been prepared for by all and are, hopefully, attended by many. If you want to grill the head, make an appointment, and go armed with a list of astute questions. That way, he or she will be able to give you their full attention. Ask about how bullying is dealt with, ask about staff turnover (will give you an indication of how happy the staff are, and how stable the school environment is for kids). Ask about university entrants from sixth form (if relevent) and about any specific extra-curricular activities your DC might be interested in. Ak about how the school fits into the community, and get specific examples - if the school and its students are involved with the local community in a positive and active way, it says alot about the school itself.

I just don't think open evening is the best time - the head won't have enough time to devote to you, and this kind of discussion would be better in his/her office with a cup of coffee.

I would ask:

'How will I be contacted if there is a problem with my child's progress, or behaviour?'

(Obviously they'll ring you if he breaks an arm trampolining or sets fire to the Portakabins. What if he's being an almighty pain in lessons or 3 grades below his target GCSE result?)

& 'How will our child be deciding her options? Will she be able to choose from a wide array of GCSEs, BTECs & other pathways, & what will happen if we disagree with the options school thinks are appropriate for her?'

&, as you suggest, but maybe less specific so more productive: 'What sort of bullying goes on at your school, & how do you combat it?'

(& of course if they say 'Bullying? At St. Cuthbert's? We don't have bullying!' then you walk away & don't look back).

It's weird, isn't it?

What's weirder, is that i so nearly didn't write that because I do, genuinely, have friends who would be v. offended by the fact I crossed a school off a list for that reason!!

Hey, mumsnet's anonymous!

anyway, you need some teachers on here, really.

If I did talk to staff, I engaged them in long chats to try and draw out how they taught subjects I had a vague knowledge of. Obviously, it's horses for courses, but i was looking for innovative, exciting teaching and ideally with a vague idea of the way the discipline was being taught in higher education.

I also looked out for indications that the management of the school was all it should be. Though I never, really. got to the bottom of how to spot that one. for that, I;m afraid I relied on hearsay. You'll really need a teacher for that one!

Hello Vulpus.

I think you're more on the case than me - I'd never have thought of asking a member of staff that!

when we were shown around by children, I made a point of asking them, in child-friendly ways, about how friendly the school was. The schools I liked were clearly very good on pastoral and friendly stuff. If the children talked about the good relationships between older and younger students, i was very happy.

The school we chose had a strong record of the kids getting involved in pastoral and community work, in order to foster an ethos of care. I thought that augured well.

I also did something weird, and went to visit schools, as in hanging about outside, at chucking-out time, just to listen in to kids chatting and watch what happened as they left.

That's weird, isn't it!! I only did it a few times. 'Twas interesting. We're in London. If there were a lot of police vans at lunch time - off my list it went. Which makes me a bit picky, I know. But each to their own.