What's your experience of same-sex education please?

how about same sex lessons and mixing sexes in playgrounds?

Is that called the diamond system, or something? Anyone have actual experience of it?

Actually saw a more sensible compromise ages ago...

A school where many of the lessons were single sex... a few mixed, but the teengers could mix socially and as got older date.

Thus less pressure or distractions in lessons but enabling development of relationship skills and rookie relationships.

Kinda made sense best of both worlds and also gives a mix of mised time and single sex time for girlie, blokie talk

I went to a single sex girls' grammar many moons ago, and, as an only child, I had a great difficulty mixing with boys in my mid teens.

Because of this, I was a little bit reluctant to send my ds to a single sex school, although, come year 7, I had no choice, as all local selective schools are single sex (and it is within 500m of our house).

However, life is different for young people these days. They are far more likely to network, and to use MSN / facebook to expand their local friendship groups. Ds also started rowing (through lottery initiative), and joined the rowing club in Year 8. This enabled him to meet loads of girls and boys from totally different schools (private, state, singlesex, mixed...). The friendships have continued even though most of them have left the club, and a number of his close group of friends are 'networked' from rowers.

Not sure about girls'/boys' subjects: I did 3 sciences, and ds is doing art and graphics!!

I went to an army co-ed comp, followed by a similar international school. Then at the beginning of the 5th year (half way through the O level syllabus) I moved to an English girls boarding school (it is now a very good one, but was going through a bad patch mid-70s when I was there).

I, too, hated the bitchiness of all-girls schooling - despite being one of 3 sisters, it took me completely by surprise. More importantly, as a scientist, I found the chemistry teaching poor and the physics appalling. I also really missed the academic competition I had been used to from the brightest boys at large mixed co-ed schools.

I went to both all girls and a co ed at secondary school level! Loved both. I have no hang ups about either. Neither did anything better or worse than the other that really stands out.

If I had to say anything I would say all girls was a laugh! No pressure to be anything other than just me with my friends. No boyfriend pressure or to look cool infront of the boys kind of pressure not that there was much at the co ed, but it was ever so slightly there!

In the process of choosing senior schools for my eldest. Am considering both which puzzles alot of peeps as they seem to think you need to be "For" or "Against" one or the other. I think the final decision will come down to the SCHOOL and what it can offer my daughter as a whole and not whether its single sex or co ed.

GrimmaTheNome - just to add. We send our DSs (age 9 and 7) to an 'girls scool'. They have been in that environment for their whole school life. There are 96% girls and 4% boys in the school.

Not sure what that does to boys but the experiment seems to be going well so far.

Oh, sorry. I also had a long (30 min) bus ride to school. Most people did as well, because of where it was located. I don't see this as a drawback. The journey, in itself was pretty enjoyable - meeting up with friends on the bus.

I suppose it meant that we didn't "hang out" on week nights in the way I imagine my DCs would if they go to our local Comp.,but my 2 best friends were nearby and we'd see each other at weekends. I'd see other, local friends who I'd been at primary school with, at dancing lessons, and actually it's quite nice to have friends from outside your own school.

Reading this back makes me see how positive I found school. I consider myself to be pretty socially well-adjusted (despite being up at 3 am on MN !)

I went to a girls grammar school in the 80s and loved school and thrived academically.

I did not find my school bitchy or appearance-conscious, but often find this is an assumption made by others about girls' schools

Unfortunately the equivalent boys school was miles away so we didn't share any lessons or out-of-school activities with them, unlike other grammar schools in the area.

I would consider sending my DCs to a single sex school, but would be reassured if some mixing with other schools was happening.

I have a brother, so I didn't feel at sea with boys. I did find though, that I missed out on early teenage friendships and dating with boys, so that when I went to University I was more motivated to make friends with boys than girls (not in a sexual way !!). Other friends of mine didn't feel this, because they did tennis lessons, or drama, alongside boys, so I'd bear that in mind, too.

On the fourth alternative my cousin went to a school paired like this and it did seem to work quite well on the socialising front (joint choirs etc). Certainly she seemed to have more friends who just happened to be boys than the girls from my school who saw boys as entirely people to get off with (pretty much regardless of whether they were actually nice people). However her younger brothers and sisters went to a differet mixed school and they had even more normal relationships with boys. At my school over 50% of the girls left at sixth form for mixed colleges and boys schools with girls in the sixth form, and the predominant reason was that there were boys there. Our headteacher found it very annoying (very few girls schools have boys in the sixth form). When I did the same and went to a boys school with girls n the sixth form I was appauled at how badly the boys behaved there, so I don't think all boys schools are a good idea either.

The other issue at all-girls schools is that they can be terribly bitchy and appearance conscious (this might be so at all schools of course, but I know of a couple of girls schools where this has been the culture).

Re. travel I do think that can be a disadvantage, and the local comp would probably have the smallest catchment (private schools tend to have larger catchment areas, and grammar can have children with very long commutes). If you want your dd to have an independant social life then it is certainly a consideration. It is a bit crap if all your firends live a long way a away (even more crap if they live relatively close to each other and a long way away from you).

I went to a single sex school in the 80's. Academically it was the best school in town and was very strict compared to the mixed school. TBH I think I only progressed as far as I did academically, (I went onto sixth form and then uni), because the school was so strict and I was disciplined. I have always been very average and extremely lazy and left more to my own devices I would have arsed about more and failed most of my GCSE's.

Mine are at the end of long bus routes (though i car them part way in the morning as i go that way to work) and really don't seem to suffer. Their school does late buses though so they can do all the after school activities they want to (or sometimes i can pick up after work) I think it's really important they don't miss out on that score. The social thing is more of a pain, but only because unsurprisingly there are pupils who travel in just as far but from the opposite direction ..... hmmm cue lots of parental taxi service. However since it is so much better than our local comp (think 3 heads in 4 years, no head atm, no governing body atm and kids leaving in droves to go anywhere else) am basically happy.

Totally agree abetadad. A couple of dd's friends are at the ends of long bus routes & it's a pita. Not only can they not do after school stuff at school or they miss the bus, but once they get home there's no time for much except homework. They lose touch with local friends & all their school friends live miles away so they can't do so much socialising there either. I spent over 4 hours one weekend driving dd to/from a sleepover a few weeks ago - it's not something she or I have the time for often.

I went to two single-sex prep schools and a single-sex grammar before moving abroad, aged 12, and spending the rest of my schooling in a mixed international secondary school.

I really don't think I would EVER choose a single-sex school for my children. For me, mixed was just so much better in every way.

My dd is at an all-girls school at the moment - but I will consider moving her if necessary for A-Levels, depending on what subjects she wants to do. Her school gets good results but a lot of girls tend to do A-Levels in what used to be called "soft" subjects when I was at school.

I went to an all-girls school and loved it. I didn't think boys were an alien species as there were plenty around from other schools and outside school social groups were mixed (although my best friends were girls).

It's hard to compare really as I never went to secondary school with boys. I would prefer to educate my children in single sex schools though, based on my experience.

dh and I both went to single sex schools. Our children won't. I think they are divisive and I'd like our children to attend the same school in any case.

snorkle - journey tme is really important.

My DW had a long journey to school.Parents had not got enough money to go private so she went to the local girls grammar but an hour each way. She had to drop all sport and after school activity to get back home to do homework.

She also hated the general bitchiness and the oppressive religiosity of a convent school. Not at all boy mad though.

I agree girls schools do struggle sometimes to get good science teachers because fewer girls choose science and have less good facilites so the best science teachers go elsewhere.

Some girls schools do struggle to attract good Physics teachers I'm told (actually I think most schools do), so you might want to make some discrete enquiries if your dd is likely to go that route.

I definitely think single sex suits some personality types better than others. I went to a girls secondary school & rather wish I hadn't (did well enough & didn't not enjoy it, but always wished I'd been at a mixed school), some of my peers definitely fell into the boy obsessed camp, but perhaps that's true of any group of teenage girls .

The main reason I'd be hesitant in your case though is the journey times involved. How long actually are they in hours per day? It can make such an impact on quality of life. If it's too long would moving be a possibility (not necessarily straight away, but after she's got a place & you are sure she's settled)?

I swore after my own experience at an all girls convent I would never inflict selective single-sex education on my kids. I did and regret it. DD1 at a grammar, thriving academically but suffering socially, not least because of a very long journey. Will be leaving at the end of year 10 to go to mixed college for A levels - I don't know who's most relieved, me or her!

DD2 at local comp (ok but she's being allowed to coast) and is extremely happy. Much more comfortable with boys than big sister and has many friends.

i went to an all girls comp in the 80s. I found it fine, although all girls together can get very bitchy.

i think, and this is only from personal experience, that i was able to do better at science and maths as there was no assumption that they were 'boys' subjects, as there were no boys there.

went to a girls' grammar in the 80s. It was ideal for me as it was socially very relaxed - no pressure at all, no bitchiness to speak of and those who remained children until quite late in adolescence were not disadvantaged. It was academically good though not pressured. Huge sixth form with majority doing sciences i think. Music was great. Sports, art and creative subjects were weak, and the physical environment was crumbling with no money for repairs, so chunks of the school were roped off - the funds were kept for books. That was the 80s for you! Allegedly there was a linked boys' school but we did very little with them.

My sister was at the same school and had a fairly horrible time with some bullying, so explore the peer group as much as you can.

grimma- just be careful pickig a girls single sex school if your DD is good at science. Frankly, some single sex girls schools are notoriously weak at science and have poor science facilities relative to boys schools. Not all of course - but some do because it is not seen as a 'girls' subject.

I dont thik sciences are seen as boys subjects to girls in single sex schools anyway, because they havnt got the boys telling them otherwise.

DD has done science as a whole subject up to now. I think that will change in year 9 ready for GCSE choices so it will be interesting to see how the sciences will devide then.

Although she is more creative and will probably pick chemistry or modular I think over physics or biology