Your kid is leaving school, what are you buying their head of year?

A child I don't teach but who adopted me as a safe adult made me an artwork. It's beautiful.

I never normally would have but my sons head of year has been outstanding in supporting him to travel for international duty, written glowing reports every six weeks to the club (who check in grades, attitude and attendance), come to a game and write a full analysis of our son for his scholarship. This is above and beyond and deserves a big thank you gift.

We didn’t. I think the head was actually leaving so gave £20 though kinda resented it as my DD had only been there for sixth form, but I think for longer term students their parents have considerably more (private school). But I didn’t give anything except to my son’s form tutor when he left school after GCSEs. He’d been there since Y4, but when I told them he was not returning, emailed to his year head, head of the secondary school and finance department I got not one acknowledgment, not one ‘best wishes for the future’ for my son, nothing. After eight years of fees I thought that was pretty poor.

We did something similar to this and DD wrote cards.

I always figured once they got to the stage of education where they were seeing multiple teachers, the gifts ended except where a teacher had gone above and beyond or if the child themselves wants to get one. I would say alcohol is definitely a no unless you are 100% sure what the teacher's relationship with alcohol is like.

My daughter sent cards to all her subject teachers and a for a few she brought a small gift. Nothing for HOY though as she had no direct contact with them. She did buy her a tutor a gift as they stay with them from yr 7-11.

My ds is finishing a'levels. I will buy his dt teacher a bottle of champagne. I've known her since he was 11 and I know she has gone over and above to support & encourage him with his NEA.
His physics and maths teachers will get bottles of red wine. He's on track for AAA thanks to their hard work.

We used to bring in bottles of wine and chocolate etc for form tutors at Xmas and end of year

Yr11s giving teachers gifts themselves is not unusual

I can assure you they were. I’m a primary teacher and an end of year note from a pupil or parent saying how much they’ve enjoyed being in my class is the best present a teacher can get (although a nice bottle of wine is a close second).

DD wrote the teachers she especially liked and who had gone above and beyond a thank you card. Other than that, nothing.

It doesn't need to be a gift. That's part of what makes it a gift after all, the choice to give it. Some people choose to do this. It's not a new edict.

DS is just finishing Y13, he's written thank you cards for each teacher, important ones got a poem(!)

Guidance teacher will get restaurant vouchers. Poor bloke has gone absolutely above and beyond though, so I don’t feel anything could express how grateful we are to him!

Why does it need to be via a gift instead of, ya know, saying thanks?

At the end of year 11 bought DS's form tutor a Costa voucher. She'd been his form tutor for 5 years and also taught him for one of his GCSE subjects, and was very supportive. No plans to buy anything for 6th form tutor.

People showing gratitude? Yes it's a thing but it's nothing new.

My DH is a secondary school teacher and gets a wide range of presents from kids. We have only ever bought one secondary teacher a bottle of wine as he went above and beyond. My DH has had personalised mugs, socks, chocolates, meal vouchers, wine, beer, funny soap bars, collage of photographs, and more I can’t remember . A mixture of silly stuff from the kids themselves and more expensive stuff from parents. Whilst my DH is not always easy to live with or popular with management the kids in school love him!

When my dcs were at secondary school, they had the same form tutor from year 7 until year 11. Over the years we had got to know him quite well so I made sure to buy a gift we knew he would appreciate. We got him a rose bush and a bottle of his favourite wine.
DC is now a secondary teacher and their favourite end of year gift was last year when the students baked a chocolate fudge cake for him - they are it during form time on the last day.

Dd is a secondary school teacher. See yes some lovely cards with messages of thanks from students and sometimes things like bars of chocolate or biscuits, but they are always bought by the students and never the parents.

Decent wine at the end of year 13, nothing the other years. Did the SEN department nice chocolates as they were amazing.

Absolutely nothing seen as he saw fit to let my DS leave school alone with no call home after he had disclosed to a teacher at school that he was suicidal. Then when we queried this said "well I didn't think he meant it".

Nothing.

I sent his guidance teacher a nice email though.

Is this a fucking thing now, too?!

Id struggle to tell you the name of my child's head of year.
So, nothing.