Y11 2025/26 The Final Stretch

My DD hasn't eaten any of her packed lunches or had dinners at school because she's too nervous to eat, so I've also bought lots of snacks and hoped for the best. I let her pick dinner the night before the exams so at least she's had a substantial dinner.

I've discovered today when going to top up DS's dinner money account that he didn't have lunch on Friday which was the day of his first exam in the afternoon. He says he was revising for the exam so didn't go to lunch. He has dismissed all my concerns and offers of packed lunches etc and says it's fine because he had snacks 🙈 so much for my excellent exam nutrition prep! Guess I need to get in some good snacks.

I feel this is the last "long stretch" of revising. DD did a bit of biology and drama this morning. We have just been out to collect her prom dress, which is over a foot too long so I need to book alterations. She's over the moon with it, so a little bit of positive in her day, that's always good. Her plan is a couple of papers this afternoon, likely biology and history. She got her last assembly yesterday and got the award for dance and history. I'm super proud of her, she worked so hard at history and I'm just glad the teacher noticed the effort she has been putting in.

still bogged down by history / poems. Son hasn’t done much at all today. I’m hoping he’ll crack on

Just checking in - DS is pretty relaxed at the moment, but I’m aware he might get stressed once the actual exams begin.

I feel like a lot is expected from them at a young age. And what seems like an already high number of GCSEs and then Further Maths on top feels like even more.

@3GoldenLamps your poor DS. Would have thought both students and teachers would be more sensitive about this kind of thing.

DD scared herself last night by starting a very tricky biology paper and then realising she'd downloaded an A level paper by mistake!

She's got German and Drama this week, last day is Wednesday but only for a couple of hours. Then they're all planning on going somewhere to play rounders, rather than revising, but as it's the last day they'll all be together, I don't think I can say no.

Week after looks pretty heavy (for everyone?) with English lit, biology, history and maths.

My dd is doing 3-4 hours a day at the weekend, 1.5-2.5h mon-thurs including after school sessions at school. Nothing on Fridays. So a fair bit but not the maximum possible. She would burn out if she did (adhd and just her personality!). She’s aiming for 7+ in stronger subjects and 5+ in weaker. So not going for the top grades but wants to do her best while maintaining wellbeing. I am happy with that.

Latin here on Friday too! First proper exam (after Art ones this week)..

DD enjoyed her last morning in school yesterday, seems relaxed and the subshine is definitely a plus. I gave her room a deep clean and sort out. Went to get her prom dress shortened in the afternoon (£40 ouch!). Had activities in the evening and today so I don't think much revision as yet.

First exams are Latin and Drama next Friday.

@3GoldenLamps sending love and positive thoughts to you both too. It's so hard sometimes/

Related to this my DD came home yesterday with her shirt signed. She wouldn't let me read the messages (standard!) but she did tell me about a signature / message from Molly. Molly had apparently written my DD a message on her shirt saying thankyou for being kind and speaking to her when she was new to the school (Y9 starter) and knew no one, it made her feel much happier. DD has no memory of it at all, and her and Molly aren't in the same friend groups now at all. DD was surprised when she asked to sign her shirt. But it just shows the effect we can have on others. I told DD I was so proud of her for that.

So GoldenLamps I hope your DS finds his tribe soon - I know he will and some other kind souls and him will make friends x

Just a quick post to send love to @3GoldenLamps and her lovely DS….oh goodness your posts really got me too. As I’ve written on previous posts I have an older DS with asd/adhd who has struggled in the past and I know will continue to struggle. I hear you wholeheartedly on the ‘micro griefs’. Also sending you both a hug and lots of positive vibes for DS for sixth form and beyond 💐

My DD has a virus, sore throat, runny nose - thankfully not this time next week! I'm letting her sleep it off this morning and hope she is up for some revision later. What level of work is everyone doing at this point? I figure it is too late for the topics she struggles with and just concentrate on what will get her marks. Also past papers for mainly maths and science.

She is struggling with the volume of history and lit which is understandable, and I am struggling to help her to make all of that manageable a week out!

Edited to add @3GoldenLamps I have an autistic DS who has found his people at college. He is still happiest in his room gaming but his social skills have improved so much. Secondary is so hard for some kids but they can be themselves so much more the older they get. Lots of love and support to you both.

@3GoldenLamps I’m so sorry. It’s understandable that you and your DS feel distressed. What shines through is your powerful love and care for him. He has that strong foundation, the best love there is. But it doesn’t make the current situation easier for you 💐

Yesterday / today our son has started feeling very anxious. I really feel for him. He’s predicted good grades and he’s putting a lot of pressure on himself. His computer has a problem and he’s completely fixated on that but I think that’s a symptom and the underlying cause is worry about his exams. I’m pleased he’s talking to us but I’m not sure how best to help him. He just wants to feel better.

@3GoldenLamps your post made me so sad. At 15/16, children should know better and be inclusive.i hope today is a better day for him. Id be tempted to speak to school, not so that they fix it, but so that they understand that send children can be isolated even in the most innocent of situation...

I was mostly still working on site (I work in food) but negotiated one day from home a week. I loved those Fridays. I'd have loads of calls but we'd pause and do Joe Wick's workout together. Or rather I'd do it, my DS would do a tiny bit then flop on the sofa. 🤣

I do think there were learnings from it for him though. His school didn't really have lessons but set the work ahead of time. So he sat down, about 6:30am normally and did it all in about 2 hours. Then joined the "start of the day" teams call with his class and was done. There was a self motivation and efficiency to it I couldn't fault to be fair.

Yes! I remember when the DCs were little someone commented to me once that the days are long but the years are short. That is so so true.

The whole lockdown era seems like surreal now.

Isn't it odd to think Covid and the lockdowns were when our kids were in primary school and now they've nearly finished secondary? Seems like 5 minutes ago.

No, they didn't say no- they just didn't do it. I suspect knowing him, he sort of hung around on the edges and waited to be noticed. Which is how he rolls generally.

He's not sure what he wants to study really. He is veering towards the humanities options but is doing really well with STEM and maths.

Oh heck @3GoldenLamps sounds like a right emotional rollercoaster. But remember 9 people DID sign his shirt and that's still cool.

My DS is a funny old bean. He reminds me of myself at his age. Quite quiet. Except he seems far less anxious than I ever was. I'm just worried that it's just not on the outside and going on inside.

Right now I've stopped nudging him "so what's on the plan for revision today?" I think it's getting a little on the late side. I might a couple more times but it feels like wellbeing is more important from here on in.

School have still not bothered to reply on whether they're going to have study leave. So glad when he'll leave that school. We had originally intended to send him to another but especially when covid hit, it seemed sensible to keep him with friends at the time. But generally it's been pretty crap. Went from "good" to "requires improvement" in his time there and communication particularly has been appalling. The only parents evenings we've ever had have been online. Short meetings of 5 minutes which are automatically cut off when the time elapses. One teacher in particular would almost never join citing being off ill or technical problems. I dread to think how parents who had serious concerns have coped.

He's applied to a 6th form college nearby which is state but pretty selective in a way (demands 7s minimum in A level subjects and quite high GCSE marks overall). It has been his choice but the one I would have chosen. In fact, stubborn as he is (can't think who he gets it from lol) when I suggested it, he was adamant he didn't want to go. So we looked at three options. I backed off entirely and he chose that one. I think it's going to be a shock to the system though, providing he gets in, being in classes with other bright kids and higher expectations.

So that's his motivation, he needs the grades for that college but I don't want to labour it.

Even though my GCSEs were over 30 years ago, it does feel like yesterday going through all this. I can't remember doing that much revision though, at least not till I got to A levels. And of course, four of my 11 GCSEs were 100% coursework so I'm not sure the exam period felt so intense. It was mostly science, languages and map reading lol... Like finding your way to a YHA using a physical map and coordinates is a useful skill nowadays. 😆

It isn't usual for teachers to sign shirts. Perhaps the teachers didn't realise he wanted them to sign his shirt?

I very much doubt they were signing other pupils shirts and he asked to have his shirt signed and the teachers said no.

OP I hope your son feels better soon.

I’ve told dd the weekend long lie ins are now a thing of the past! We’ve agreed 8.30 I’ll wake her and on study leave days she’ll be at least awake before I leave for work. I’m toying with sending her to my parents though so I know she’ll be fed and taken for walks!

That’s great. Hopefully he feels comfortable enough with the teachers that he’ll know for alevel. What does he want to study? He sounds absolutely delightful.

@3GoldenLamps I'm so sorry your son had to go through that and you as well, as parents we feel it all just as much (sometimes more) than they do.

I'm more angry about the teachers now you've said it's a small independent school. They should have had an awareness and been able to quietly step in.