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Original poster

The 11+ / private schools application experience in North London

53 replies

Lindalove · 16/02/2026 11:39

I don’t post often, but I wanted to share our experience of supporting our son, who goes to a state primary, through the independent / 11+ grammar route in North London over the last year, in case it’s helpful to other families considering this path. I would have appreciated this post two years ago anyway?!

It’s obviously a privileged position to even be able to explore private schools. We have one child, which makes it just about manageable for us. But what surprised me most, and isn’t discussed as often, is how demanding, expensive and emotionally intense the process can be well before any offer is made! For context, our son attends a relatively gentrified, Ofsted Outstanding state primary in North London. In Years 5–6 he has been consistently assessed as “above expectations” across subjects. He’s bright and curious, though not a standout academic.

He used Atom Learning for nearly two years and had two tutors (maths and English) who came weekly in Year 5. Both tutors felt he was a reasonable candidate for the schools below; Latymer was mainly for experience/practice. In the run-up to exams, he generally scored Strong or Master on Atom islands and achieved around 105–110 on Atom SAS mocks (slightly above average — noting that Atom’s average reflects the cohort using the platform rather than all children nationally).

Costs (before fees)

  • Atom Learning: ~£60–£70 per month plus extras like puzzles and creative comprehension downloads
  • Tutors: £55–£65 per hour (per subject)
  • Additional books
  • Application fees: ~£180–£200 per school or for in-school mocks

This did affect how we spent elsewhere, though that was our choice, just laying out the costs.

So the grammar/ indie schools we applied to were as follows and our final outcomes:

Latymer Grammar School A very popular option locally, with a MASSIVE number of applicants for relatively few places. The assessments include written maths, English and VR, with a strong emphasis on speed, particularly in VR. We found that Atom alone was not sufficient preparation, and that the overall level required is extremely high. Our son’s mock results were around 60% in maths and 75% in English.
Assessment day (my son’s score): minus 4/10 Son intensely disliked this. Large numbers of children in big halls, which he found quite intimidating. Communication felt limited, and the experience was stressful for him. This may suit children who are very VERY academically strong and comfortable in highly pressured environments. For others, it’s worth thinking carefully about whether it’s the right fit. Our son didn’t get to the second stage.

Highgate School: Also highly competitive and very popular, with many applicants from paid primary prep schools drilled for entrance exams unlike state school kids. The assessment included written maths, English (comprehension and creative writing) and NVR, followed by interviews for shortlisted candidates.
Assessment day rating: 8/10. Well organised, with friendly staff and smaller groups, which felt more supportive.* *Challenging, but felt fair and well run. A positive experience overall, worth it as a 'stretch' option for my son. He was then asked back for an interview and activity day at second stage, which was also well run - he had fun soldering and doing team games. He wasn’t offered a final place however (I think 700 kids went for 80 places).

Forest School: A lengthy assessment day (around four hours) covering a wide range of skills: maths, comprehension, VR, NVR, written English, a collaborative task and an individual interview. Assessment day rating: 9/10 Long but warm and well structured. Breaks and group activities helped children manage the day. Overall this was* *academic, but with a clear emphasis on balance and rounded development. They do the interview on the day which suggests they are at least interested in the child, not just their results. He also applied for a drama scholarship and found both the initial assessment and the second stage assessment fun and engaging. In the end he didn’t get a drama scholarship but DID get offered a place which he is taking up! YAY!! About 400-500 kids went for I think around 120-140 places.

North Bridge House (Canonbury): A smaller intake and a noticeably calmer atmosphere. Says it's non selective, but assessment included Maths, English and NVR Quest exams plus a small group interview. Assessment day rating: 9/10. Friendly and reassuring, with a strong focus on pastoral care. A follow-up taster day helped our son feel comfortable in the environment. He was later invited back for a drama scholarship day. Overall, this felt like a good fit for a bright, motivated child who might benefit from a smaller, less pressurised setting. My son also applied for a drama scholarship and found the drama assessment fun. He didn’t get a drama scholarship but was offered a place but in the end we went for Forest.

So - would we do this differently? I asked my son if he would do it again BEFORE he got any offers and he said yes as he thought it had helped him overall as a person. We agreed however that we'd have skipped the grammar and probably have asked my son to apply to another indie however. North London indies are competitive but the Latymer/ grammar experience is off the scale and not in a good way.

However - both the 11+ and independent entrance routes increasingly seem designed for children who have been intensively prepared from a very young age. That isn’t the reality for many state-school families, even those in strong schools. I’ve also noticed that platforms like Atom are now suggesting short, regular practice from as early as Year 3 in preparation for 11+, which can start to feel like an arms race rather than a measured approach to learning. Latymer’s position is particularly complex. As a grammar school, its purpose is to offer academic opportunities regardless of background. While huge congratulations to the children who secure places — they’ve clearly worked very hard — it’s difficult not to question how accessible the process truly is for families without the means to invest heavily in preparation.

Lastly, as this was our first rodeo, we also didn't realise how hard as a family we would find it to set him doing a load of extra study - not just to always arrange and support it (weekends get restricted, fast), but the worry in case he'd done all this extra study and didn't get any indie or grammar offers, and whether this would affect his view on the benefits of working extra hard. The emotional toll is not small on anyone!! In the end his hard work paid off, but I didn’t sleep that well for about 6 months…

Hope this might be helpful to people about to plan for next year! :) Please share your experiences if any of this chimes...

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CruCru · 14/10/2026 09:30

This is an interesting thread. My son has been at his school for a couple of years now (he joined at 13+) and I remember saying to someone that the admissions process for these schools reminded me of getting a graduate job out of university - only done by 10/11 year old boys.

One thing to say about the DAO etc exams - they are really early in the school year so quite a few parents use that as a practice for the later independent school exams. If the children get in then that would be great but it is not necessarily expected.

The process for girls was a lot more civilised. My daughter did five Consortium schools plus one other so the main exam was a computer based set of tests that she did in school. She then just went to the interviews at all the different schools.

Original poster
Lindalove · 09/10/2026 07:07

Jumpingthroughhulas · 08/10/2026 12:54

As someone who also went through the 11+ in North London, I agree with OP that it was extremely stressful. The sheer volume of applicants, the intensity of the prep, the chatter in the playground, the comparisons when some children got through and others didn't. Yes, it is a uniquely personal experience and I admire and respect the families and children who manage to not get caught up in the noise. I really do wish that I had been able to do that! But I am yet to find a parent in my neck of the woods who didn't find it challenging. I am also yet to find one who didn't use at least one tutor. Of course, these families exist but in our area I do believe they are the exception, not the norm.

We had a weekly tutor and did practice papers. Other parents at the school told me I wasn't doing nearly enough. They were probably right because DD1 didn't get through! But at least we tried and she is in no way traumatised by it. She is now thriving in Year 8 of her secondary school and it's all a distant memory.

On another note, @Lindalove I hope your DS is settling well into Forest. DD2 is going to sit the 10+ advance entry in a couple of months, which I am hoping will avoid any 11+ all together! Keeping all the things crossed it goes well.

Good luck with your 10 plus!!!

OP posts:
Minorie · 09/10/2026 05:45

Lindalove · 07/10/2026 07:45

@Minorie thanks for this and good luck. My son just started Year 7 at an independent school (Forest) and I can't see how you would fit tutoring into the school day with travel, homework, any after school interests or clubs, and just life/ relaxation/ seeing friends. It is full on especially for the first few weeks. I can only pity poor kids who have an early lifetime of tutoring; there is more to being a functional and happy adult than results, and am shocked that indies are saying this! Surely they should warn that the kids need to either find their way or go elsewhere, as also you end up paying double for private school and also tutoring on top.

@Lindalove best of luck at Forest School, the head is great and ive heard its excellent.

I think these super selectives are being honest, they are seeing kids really struggle once they get there so they want you to keep tutoring. They know that telling people not to apply will make no difference. We are trying one of these schools and although we really liked it, the competition is so fierce that I dont think we can do it. But I won't be doing a manic tutoring thing with DD either. She will try her best and that's all we can do.

Breeze67 · 08/10/2026 13:41

Lindalove · 08/10/2026 12:10

I totally understand, the thread is meant to be a personal experience for others to reflect on and/or add to if they like, so it it doesn't resonate that's fine of course, and it great you are sharing your experience too.

The same goes for using tools like Atom, which we both did find useful, and many do, although they create their own stresses like worrying about whether you are at 130 for everything as exams draw close.

Regarding your point that one day is not a reflection of a school, that's absolutely correct, but through a child's eyes, one bad experience can be enough. These were my son's ratings, they are what they are, and he is allowed to judge the school like that based on how he felt and experienced it on the day - harsh perhaps, but afterall, this is an admissions process he was experiencing, not me. He did very much enjoy other days; Latymer is merely a comparator. I have no doubt is a great school, managing insane numbers of applicants, especially now VAT has affected independent schools.

I also framed the process as a challenge to him, but I did need to be realistic - few children find multiple exam days fun, more a chance to develop resilience, which is how my son saw it and why he says he would do it again. I personally think, which others may not, that we don't always consider our child in the moment versus our hoped for future child, and weigh up the impact in the short term for the hoped for long term gain. I felt absolute guilt sometimes in this process, wondering if it was worth it and whether I might kill the joy of learning. For us, it was, for the work we did versus where he is now, but he overall felt the work was manageable, became only mildly stressed at times, and was proud of himself afterwards.

Show quote history

I personally think, which others may not, that we don't always consider our child in the moment versus our hoped for future child, and weigh up the impact in the short term for the hoped for long term gain. I felt absolute guilt sometimes in this process, wondering if it was worth it and whether I might kill the joy of learning.

I completely agree with this and totally get where it’s coming from. In principle, experiencing a bit of pressure or mild stress in moderation is just a normal part of growing up. Given how relaxed UK primary school life is generally (I often joke with my DD that she’s played all day at school, so now it’s time to actually do some work!), introducing a bit of challenge through the 11+ feels like a really healthy balance.
However, location plays a crucial role in shaping that experience. I realize we are in a very lucky position in terms of education: as a girl in SW London with a wide selection of both grammar and independent schools, her situation is worlds apart from a boy in North London facing far fewer options. It is astonishing how severe the inequality of educational resources is across such short distances, and it often has little to do with wealth distribution—it's just a bizarrely uneven distribution of schools.

Jumpingthroughhulas · 08/10/2026 12:54

As someone who also went through the 11+ in North London, I agree with OP that it was extremely stressful. The sheer volume of applicants, the intensity of the prep, the chatter in the playground, the comparisons when some children got through and others didn't. Yes, it is a uniquely personal experience and I admire and respect the families and children who manage to not get caught up in the noise. I really do wish that I had been able to do that! But I am yet to find a parent in my neck of the woods who didn't find it challenging. I am also yet to find one who didn't use at least one tutor. Of course, these families exist but in our area I do believe they are the exception, not the norm.

We had a weekly tutor and did practice papers. Other parents at the school told me I wasn't doing nearly enough. They were probably right because DD1 didn't get through! But at least we tried and she is in no way traumatised by it. She is now thriving in Year 8 of her secondary school and it's all a distant memory.

On another note, @Lindalove I hope your DS is settling well into Forest. DD2 is going to sit the 10+ advance entry in a couple of months, which I am hoping will avoid any 11+ all together! Keeping all the things crossed it goes well.

Original poster
Lindalove · 08/10/2026 12:10

Breeze67 · 08/10/2026 11:30

Fair enough, though I don’t think it’s entirely off-topic. You opened the thread by saying “what surprised me most, and isn’t discussed as often, is how demanding, expensive and emotionally intense", but I just wanted to point out that this is a very, very personal experience. So far, we’ve found the whole process quite enjoyable—admittedly, our environment is not exactly the same as yours, as we are based in SW London and still in the middle of the 11+.
None of the extra resources or tutoring setups you listed are universally necessary—personally, I think platforms like Atom are a waste of time and money, and hiring two tutors for a single year feels quite excessive. I also don’t see much point in rating the exam day experience; after all, it’s just a one-off event. Rating Latymer ridiculously low simply because of "Large numbers of children in big halls, which he found quite intimidating" feels a bit harsh on the school. I often see parents confuse good pastoral care with overprotection. Experiencing a large-scale setup that mimics real-world scenarios isn't necessarily a bad thing for a child if it can be framed positively. I always encourage my DD to see grammar school entrance exams as fun challenges, and she genuinely feels that way too.
At the end of the day, so much of the 11+ experience comes down to perspective, and because every child and family setup is so different, one person's experience is rarely a template for another.

Show quote history

I totally understand, the thread is meant to be a personal experience for others to reflect on and/or add to if they like, so it it doesn't resonate that's fine of course, and it great you are sharing your experience too.

The same goes for using tools like Atom, which we both did find useful, and many do, although they create their own stresses like worrying about whether you are at 130 for everything as exams draw close.

Regarding your point that one day is not a reflection of a school, that's absolutely correct, but through a child's eyes, one bad experience can be enough. These were my son's ratings, they are what they are, and he is allowed to judge the school like that based on how he felt and experienced it on the day - harsh perhaps, but afterall, this is an admissions process he was experiencing, not me. He did very much enjoy other days; Latymer is merely a comparator. I have no doubt is a great school, managing insane numbers of applicants, especially now VAT has affected independent schools.

I also framed the process as a challenge to him, but I did need to be realistic - few children find multiple exam days fun, more a chance to develop resilience, which is how my son saw it and why he says he would do it again. I personally think, which others may not, that we don't always consider our child in the moment versus our hoped for future child, and weigh up the impact in the short term for the hoped for long term gain. I felt absolute guilt sometimes in this process, wondering if it was worth it and whether I might kill the joy of learning. For us, it was, for the work we did versus where he is now, but he overall felt the work was manageable, became only mildly stressed at times, and was proud of himself afterwards.

OP posts:
Breeze67 · 08/10/2026 11:30

Lindalove · 07/10/2026 18:05

Perhaps, but let’s not derail the thread

Fair enough, though I don’t think it’s entirely off-topic. You opened the thread by saying “what surprised me most, and isn’t discussed as often, is how demanding, expensive and emotionally intense", but I just wanted to point out that this is a very, very personal experience. So far, we’ve found the whole process quite enjoyable—admittedly, our environment is not exactly the same as yours, as we are based in SW London and still in the middle of the 11+.
None of the extra resources or tutoring setups you listed are universally necessary—personally, I think platforms like Atom are a waste of time and money, and hiring two tutors for a single year feels quite excessive. I also don’t see much point in rating the exam day experience; after all, it’s just a one-off event. Rating Latymer ridiculously low simply because of "Large numbers of children in big halls, which he found quite intimidating" feels a bit harsh on the school. I often see parents confuse good pastoral care with overprotection. Experiencing a large-scale setup that mimics real-world scenarios isn't necessarily a bad thing for a child if it can be framed positively. I always encourage my DD to see grammar school entrance exams as fun challenges, and she genuinely feels that way too.
At the end of the day, so much of the 11+ experience comes down to perspective, and because every child and family setup is so different, one person's experience is rarely a template for another.

Original poster
Lindalove · 07/10/2026 18:05

Perhaps, but let’s not derail the thread

OP posts:
Breeze67 · 07/10/2026 16:10

Lindalove · 07/10/2026 07:45

@Minorie thanks for this and good luck. My son just started Year 7 at an independent school (Forest) and I can't see how you would fit tutoring into the school day with travel, homework, any after school interests or clubs, and just life/ relaxation/ seeing friends. It is full on especially for the first few weeks. I can only pity poor kids who have an early lifetime of tutoring; there is more to being a functional and happy adult than results, and am shocked that indies are saying this! Surely they should warn that the kids need to either find their way or go elsewhere, as also you end up paying double for private school and also tutoring on top.

I can only pity poor kids who have an early lifetime of tutoring;

Although I’m not a fan of tutoring—and have never hired a tutor for my DD, choosing to teach her myself—I see no reason to feel sorry for tutored kids. Their parents are simply doing what they believe is best for them. Expressing pity toward these children feels condescending to parents who invest in giving them a leg up. If anything, shouldn't our sympathy lie with those whose parents can’t afford extra support, or who underperform due to lack of parental engagement? At the end of the day, it just comes down to different life choices right from the start, no different from any choices we make down the line.

Original poster
Lindalove · 07/10/2026 08:35

@Stowickthevast I'm sure it wasn't meant that way, and yes I know the school has a great co-curricular approach as we know the odd family who has a child there. I would say though that your experience seems at odds with most, Latymer is known for being incredibly hard to get into, and only the very brightest get in, who are also very fast at answering questions (speed is essential). It's why children are sometimes tutored from Years 2/3 to get into it - but not always obviously! https://www.the-londoner.co.uk/london-elite-grammar-schools-qeb-henrietta-barnett/

OP posts:
Stowickthevast · 07/10/2026 08:16

You don't "need" to do any of it! You can just stay in the state system.

As a Latymer parent, I disagree with @Georgiepud statement above. "We want our children to have a soul as well as a brain".

In my experience, Latymer kids have both with great music, drama and art departments. it's your choice how heavily you tutor. As I mentioned up thread, dc1 got in with a few months of an hour a week tutoring+ practice papers starting in May of Y5.

Original poster
Lindalove · 07/10/2026 07:45

@Minorie thanks for this and good luck. My son just started Year 7 at an independent school (Forest) and I can't see how you would fit tutoring into the school day with travel, homework, any after school interests or clubs, and just life/ relaxation/ seeing friends. It is full on especially for the first few weeks. I can only pity poor kids who have an early lifetime of tutoring; there is more to being a functional and happy adult than results, and am shocked that indies are saying this! Surely they should warn that the kids need to either find their way or go elsewhere, as also you end up paying double for private school and also tutoring on top.

OP posts:
Minorie · 07/10/2026 04:37

We are now mid way through this process having done the grammar exam for Henrietta Barnett and not passed. For us it was a good experience because we saw it as practice as opposed to having a realistic chance. There were easily over a thousand children there and although my DD felt confident, I think the grammar school competition is a different beast altogether. Children had travelled miles to be there.

We haven't tutored, just opting to use books and atom since January. Currently in an all through independent where they naturally dont prep anyone to leave at the 11 plus stage. I didnt want heavy loads of pressure so have done little but regularly since the start of year 5. My children would probably still grumble at doing anything extra over and above school homework but they do enjoy being top of the class now due to the extra work we have done for the exams. Im no genius but I do have the time to support. I recognise not everyone has the time or inclination to do this! Atom wise, its all over the place, sometimes 100, sometimes 130. I would say if we solidly did atom throughout, we would be consistently at that high level now but 2nd stages at the likes of SPGS and NLCS are all paper based and need a lot more prep than just atom.

Everyone we know applying is being tutored heavily, with one actually missing school to prep at home. Either these are through recommendations or places like Explore Learning. Having spoken to admissions in some of the super selectives, their feedback has been they are seeing kids struggling after being tutored/stopping once they get in. They advised me that if I were to tutor, then this should continue if my DD got in anywhere.

I believe that we will end up where we are meant to be, and overall has been a good experience for us.

Original poster
Lindalove · 05/10/2026 07:36

Ayaboo · 06/08/2026 16:49

Latymer upper or latymer grammar

this is north London, so I am talking about the Edmonton grammar

OP posts:
Original poster
Lindalove · 05/10/2026 07:35

Minorie · 05/08/2026 06:00

Would you all have attempted more schools in hindsight? We are trying for just two indies plus one grammar due to the cost of entry/not being that impressed with the others. Only one of the indies is the dream. But im aware we are taking a big risk with such few choices.

Every time you apply for a school, that's an exam to prep for (they are not all the same) plus an application fee of £180-200 or so, so you need to decide for yourself. Our tutor recommended our son apply for three minimum, one which was very certain, one which was more of a stretch, and one which was an even bigger stretch, than also the grammar.

OP posts:
Minorie · 07/08/2026 06:59

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@BeSereneRubyShark thank you, I think our only backups would be the likes of Francis Holland and Channing, neither of which we thought was the best fit. I havent seen Queens myself.

Twilightstarbright · 06/08/2026 17:42

How do you find your tutors? All the parents I know are tight lipped and what makes it harder is we are moving area so the tutors locally aren’t familiar with the particular grammar school we want to apply for.

Ayaboo · 06/08/2026 16:49

Latymer upper or latymer grammar

Stowickthevast · 06/08/2026 15:44

You obviously need tutoring for grammar but my DD got in to Latymer from an average state school with only a few months of tuition (started Easter of Y5). We didn't apply any where else and she would have gone to the local comp had she not got in. So for the right candidate, it doesn't need to be that stressful.
She's bright but is in the middle of her cohort at Latymer, so isn't a particular genius or anything!

BeSereneRubyShark · 05/08/2026 22:35

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Minorie · 05/08/2026 06:32

Thanks @Solasum , really helpful to hear this. Its just dawning on us that only the one is potentially feasible but the other is super selective indie, and a super selective grammar. So we are thinking whether we should have put another indie so that our eggs aren't in the one basket. The cost is high when you arent that keen.

cantsleepneedsleep · 05/08/2026 06:18

I live in SW London & the grammar competition is insane, some have hours of tuition every week for years. I decided not to try for it (dc was exceeding but still would have required tuition etc) due to the impact on family life. Lots of dcs friends who didn’t get a grammar place still got private places some with bursaries & scholarships. The ones who did get Tiffin & Wilsons were very motivated to do the extra work/very bright.

Solasum · 05/08/2026 06:18

@Minorie, so much is luck of the draw. It doesn’t take much to throw a 10 year old off balance, not having slept well, unfriendly seeming staff on arrival etc. in one of the assessments DC’s group had major tech problems with an online test and found it very hard to get back in the groove.

We did one grammar exam at the start of the exam process to get used to being part of a crowd of strangers and to see how the time pressure went. DC was unphased by the exam experience, but did not get everything done.
We applied to 4 independent day schools, 3 of which were broadly on a level, and got an offer from one.

I think the absolutely crucial thing is not to let your DC set their heart on a particular school. By all means visit with them and ask their opinion, but always make it clear that there are SO many people applying a lot of it comes down to luck. Then if you end up with multiple offers you can discuss preferences in more detail.

Minorie · 05/08/2026 06:00

Would you all have attempted more schools in hindsight? We are trying for just two indies plus one grammar due to the cost of entry/not being that impressed with the others. Only one of the indies is the dream. But im aware we are taking a big risk with such few choices.

Babydoc5 · 01/03/2026 23:09

I think this is a really useful thread @Lindalove

Just to add our experience, having got both of our daughters into one of the super-selective private schools from their local state primary:

  • We started preparing from the start of Year 5 for both of them with 1/week online tutor
  • Workbooks for English/Maths/VR/NVR to start with but we felt that most of these were below the levels of the real exams
  • We started doing Atom from Easter in Year 5 and moved onto the practice exams for the last couple of months
  • Scores on Atom started out around 100 and ended up ~120 fairly consistently by the end
  • Scores in practice exams harder to judge but we were aiming for 70-80% in Maths
  • We also applied for the Grammar schools but, as the exams are earlier, did not feel that either of them were very well prepared for them. Both got through to 2nd rounds but did not do particularly well in the written exams.

I would echo thoughts that the Grammar exam experience is much worse and feels more random - I think it feels as if their exams do a less good job of really separating the children by ability, probably due to the resources available to set the exam and the sheer number of candidates.

They are however a good practice experience if you are thinking of sitting private school exams.

We didn't expect their (outstanding) state school to prepare them at all for the 11+ and they did not. Teachers were supportive of our application, but the material covered in class did not go fast enough or into enough depth.

I think it was very good for both girls, even if they had not got in, I hope it would have been building a valuable foundation for their studies and teaching them how to work hard. Not to say that it was easy nor without sacrifice, but they both coped with it surprisingly well and I don't think in the end that they missed out on very much at all - we manage to continue with play dates and other activities up until the end of the summer holidays more or less...

Best of luck to all those starting their journey!

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