I’m sorry this may be rather long, but I’d be very grateful for some views on whether there is something other than lack of effort going on here.
DS is 14 and in year 9. He genuinely seems to be very smart - in the top set for everything at secondary, came top in his primary school on SATS (maths and English), and reads multiple books a week plus has his own subscription to an (adult) news magazine as he’s so interested in current affairs. He can have detailed conversations about world politics and history that are at least as knowledgeable as my undergrads (I’m a university lecturer). His reports have always been great, both for effort and achievement, and said that he’s a pleasure to teach.
Since year 7-8 I have been slightly concerned as to his progress. He doesn’t seem to be able to communicate much at all in the languages he’s learning at school - in fact in one he can’t even count to 10 or write “my name is…”. I saw a draft humanities essay and it was badly written, structured and punctuated. In English he didn’t seem to put capital letters in. His grades still seemed OK, though, so I assumed my standards were too high.
This week everything has changed and he’s had a terrible report. Across almost all subjects his grades are slipping badly and his teachers say he isn’t making enough effort/isn’t achieving anywhere near what he’s capable of. He failed a science exam because he forgot to turn over the question paper to do the second half (!). He has been forgetting to do homework; forgetting to log homework he’s done; and finishing class assessments early after writing only the bare minimum. His teachers all say he’s great orally in class and a lovely lad, but his written work is at a much lower standard (which fits what I’ve seen) and he needs to make much more effort.
At first I was cross with him. But he seems genuinely baffled and upset. He says he’s making just as much effort as always. He says he finishes class assessments early because he has written as much as he can. He also says he hates writing and finds it hard to convert his thoughts to text (which baffles me as he reads all the time). At home, I’ve noticed he avoids picking up a pen ever, even to do maths workings or write shopping lists.
On reflection I don’t think he’s slacking off. He just seems to have no clue his written work is not meeting the right standard. I asked him to write me a 2-paragraph essay about a novel he’s recently read, which he cheerfully did (he’s unusually easygoing for a teen!) and it was dreadful - short, terrible SPAG and no structure. Yet verbally he could describe complex themes and how and why the writer had created them, discuss historical parallels, and even quote parts of the book.
Can it be just that he isn’t as bright as we thought, and his teachers are interpreting it as laziness? Or could there be something else going on, like a neurodiversity that he was able to compensate for by smartness until now? Socially he has no problems. At home he seems mostly content. He has always required a lot of attention and input though - he can’t be on his own in a room without coming to see where I am and if I’ll entertain him/feed him/chat. His much younger siblings are far more self-sufficient.
Thanks so much for any thoughts for anyone who’s got this far. Right now I don’t know whether he needs a bollocking, some skills training or an Ed Psych assessment!