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Original poster

Withdrawing from PE lessons

91 replies

Geordie2Mam · 27/11/2025 13:07

Its a long-winded post, so thanks in advance of you manage to stick with it.
My 14 year old, is struggling with PE. It has been an ongoing issue for over 1 year.
She does not get along with several of the PE teachers & the ones she does get on with, teach a higher level, so aren't available to her.
She has not done a full lesson in at least 6months due to ongoing issues.
The latest episode included a teacher saying that if she had forgotten her kit, then she would have to do participate with the boys PE lesson, to "make her feel as uncomfortable as possible".
We have emailed the school & are awaiting a reply. In the mean time we have said that we are not happy for her to participate in these lessons, until this is sorted out.
Our concern is that, these issues have been rumbling on for months now. Things improve for a short while & then we are back in the same situation. She is excelling in all other areas of her education.
Can we request that she is permanently removed from PE lessons? We're aware that it is a compulsory lesson, however at what point does her emotional wellbeing take precident? What happens for other pupils that just refuse to participate in certain lessons?

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 27/11/2025 13:55

I would certainly question the school about the “make her as uncomfortable as possible” line.

Checknotmymate · 27/11/2025 13:55

No idea what to do with school but consider getting her involved with active stuff outside of school (swimming, climbing, roller hockey) whatever works to get her active. I was put off all exercise and sport due to shitty pe teachers and wished i had more encouragement to see exercise not just as an embarrassing torture where you'd get berated every time.

RexBabetteTim · 27/11/2025 13:52

It really depends what the ongoing issues are.

If your DD is making something of nothing and basically just doesn’t like PE then you will meet resistance from the school, and rightly so.

If there is some underlying issue and she needs support then you can pursue this.

We had DS permanently removed from PE for the entire duration of secondary school, and he then withdrew from biology and chemistry for y11. There were specific problems which we worked with the SENCO on and by then he was a school refuser so it was part of a managed strategy to get him into school as much as possible.

Pixiedust49 · 27/11/2025 13:51

I hated PE at school. Absolutely detested it and dreaded every lesson. Never occurred to me ( or my parents) that it was optional. I just endured it. Surely most kids have a certain lesson/ teacher/ subject they really don’t like. I thought that was normal.

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:45

Andonthatbombshell · 27/11/2025 13:40

She won't have a choice if her child starts falling apart because of PE 🙄.

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She doesn’t want to do it. Why assume having to will result in her falling apart, ffs?!

TwinkleTwinkleLittleBatgirl · 27/11/2025 13:40

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:38

Op needs not to give her the option of “not going into school full stop” 🙄

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This. @Geordie2Mam so the teacher has stated that they said that? The latest episode included a teacher saying that if she had forgotten her kit, then she would have to do participate with the boys PE lesson, to "make her feel as uncomfortable as possible".

ItsStillWork · 27/11/2025 13:40

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:39

Why do they allow him to treat these things as optional?

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He has SEN and those things cause a lot of anxiety which I have to deal with at home

Andonthatbombshell · 27/11/2025 13:40

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:38

Op needs not to give her the option of “not going into school full stop” 🙄

Show quote history

She won't have a choice if her child starts falling apart because of PE 🙄.

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:39

ItsStillWork · 27/11/2025 13:38

I was able to drop French lessons years ago as I was really struggling with it.

im not sure if you can just opt out of lessons.

my son who’s in primary school opts out of all plays, performances and assembly’s.

Why do they allow him to treat these things as optional?

ItsStillWork · 27/11/2025 13:38

I was able to drop French lessons years ago as I was really struggling with it.

im not sure if you can just opt out of lessons.

my son who’s in primary school opts out of all plays, performances and assembly’s.

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:38

Andonthatbombshell · 27/11/2025 13:36

If there's a chance it will prevent her going into school full stop then they need to let her miss it.

Missing exercise is bad. Failing GCSE's because she won't go to school because of PE would be worse. Almost been there and nearly did that with one DC.

Op needs not to give her the option of “not going into school full stop” 🙄

Andonthatbombshell · 27/11/2025 13:36

If there's a chance it will prevent her going into school full stop then they need to let her miss it.

Missing exercise is bad. Failing GCSE's because she won't go to school because of PE would be worse. Almost been there and nearly did that with one DC.

Pricelessadvice · 27/11/2025 13:34

Lots of kids don’t necessarily ‘get on’ with every teacher, but they just have to put up with it. It’s an hour or so a week, it’s not exactly a hardship is it?

KilkennyCats · 27/11/2025 13:31

She doesn’t have to “get on with” any teachers, she just needs to follow the lesson like everyone else.

Orangepate · 27/11/2025 13:13

She probably needs the exercise and she probably needs to learn that sometimes you just have to put up with stuff you don’t like.. and remember your kit.
Honestly, you’re doing her no favours in the long run .

Octavia64 · 27/11/2025 13:09

No.

The only subject that parental request can remove children from is RE.

What are the actual issues? At secondary most students are able to tolerate teachers they do not like.

if she has physical or other disabilities then it may be a different story.

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