11+ so confused!!! Help!!

it’s also beneficial for future reference, prestige, and applications for post-16 education and university. Am I wrong to think that way?

Yes, you are. Top universities just want the best student for the course, regardless of where they went to school. Oxbridge are very keen on widening participation and this is why they have contextual offers.

Your DD will do well where she is happy. If you rip her away from her friends and familiar surroundings she may struggle to start with.

Deadline for St Pauls registration is Friday.

If she’s in y6 you may too late for registration for next year anyway. Where do you live and where is she at school now?

But if the school doesn’t offer things like LAMDA, instrument lessons, DofE, ski trips, or opportunities to prepare for and enter competitions, that child might not be fully discovered and might not discover themselves either

I bet her current top 100 school offers most if not all of these, and more.

No. SATS are not considered ast this is the exam native to state schools. The 11+ are different. In my opinion SATs are easier. At 11+ you may have non verbal reasoning that is not at SATS but also even verbal reasoning is different than English at Sats

Those a great scores, I would say typical of other serious candidates for those schools. If she’s done practice papers, you should get her to take the tests, as I mentioned for the option to say no if you decide not to take it.

cat scores are not really taken into account as the schools rely heavily on their own testing.

make sure you get the applications in before the deadline next week I think

But what is best @wat2dodontkno because at the moment you are looking at what YOU objectively feel is best based on results. And that isn’t that the only criteria because a HUGE one is where your daughter is happy and she is happy where she is

DD went to a selective grammar and the number of parents who force their likes and expectations onto their daughters and the impact of that was horrifying

talk to her and listen to her is my advice

Hi, I hear where you are coming from. Her current school is probably very good, but St Paul’s westminster, city are amongst the best in the country, and are excellent places for bright minds to develop.
I would say they are not easy to get into, especially as it seems you have not done any tailored preparation for them, which others will have done for 1.5-2 years.
You could sit the exams and if you get offers you don’t need to accept them - you would not be disadvantaged, you are perfectly entitled to explore your options.
What we tried to do in the 11 plus was to make sure we had no regrets by not doing so and so.
I think the time to register is coming up very soon so make sure you apply to any before the deadlines. Best of luck!!

Am I wrong to think that way?

Tbh, yes. You have a DD who is happy and doing well where she is, and you want to make her move, just because she ' could' get a place at a school that is further up the league tables? Yes.

If Year 6, you may have missed the deadline for Open days, applications and references from current school. If you register for the schools already, let her sit the exams but decisions would be hers to accept or refuse.

Duplicate post deleted.

This is all pretty entry level stuff, most of these are offered by decent state schools never mind private schools. You are right that if the current school doesn't offer these, then it is very limited, although I doubt this is the case.
Do remember that lamda and music lessons tend to take the child away from their standard lessons so it isn't always a good thing to do them in school anyway.
Another thing to consider is making sure that your dd can shine at a school. She might be in the top 3 chess players in her current school. If she moved to a school "strong in chess", she might be outside of the top 10 players at the new school. Therefore she might not be selected for tournaments that she could have been involved in as a star player in her old school.

Her current school will need to know as they all ask for academic references. It won’t put her at a disadvantage and I’m certain that many girls in y6 at her current school will be doing exams for other schools. As others have said it may make them offer a scholarship as a way of keeping her.

But, has your school done any prep for the exams? Although bright and top of class if going for super academic schools a lot of bright and top of class kids will be also applying and have at least a years worth of prep and more importantly practice in exam techniques so while kids apparently do pass without any prep, a lot have a little so they know how to time exams etc. application windows are rapidly closing and exams are looming so you need to apply, get her on board and then do a little bit of exam technique practice if she’s not already doing it at her current school.

As pp have said difference between top 50 and 100 is no different for a bright child but chosing to move schools for better enrichment / co curricular activities is a reason to move so do understand why it maybe appealing.

I do think it does make a difference for uni but not in the way you feel. Going to a school full of bright academic girls aiming for oxbridge and the like is going to put your daughter at a disadvantage if that’s her aim as she will be judged against her peers especially if they have similar course aspirations as her. If that is where is wants to be she possibly is better as a top performer at her current school.

tbh it’s all a moot point if she really doesn’t want to move schools. There is always the option occasional places or 16+ too so it’s not all now or never.

it’s also beneficial for future reference, prestige, and applications for post-16 education and university. Am I wrong to think that way?

Dear OP do you seriously believe that? Do you realise that at Oxbridge it does not matter and they recruite basing on achievement rather than the prestige of the school? If anything they are more pressed for accepting kids from state schools. Hence e.g. Brompton Manor case.

Let her focus on the education, and bless the fact that you have a happy child. A change of school could destroy it by making ill founded decisions.

Would you like her to swim the English Channel and for that you would change school? 🤨🧐

Actually lots of state schools offer ski trips and DoE – inc my DCs' and others I know. My DCs' school offered plenty of chance to enter competitions (like maths Olympiad and CS comps among others) and also offered music lessons. I don't think any of those things are very unusual.

But like I say, you don’t need to defend your decision to get your daughter to take the exams to get into these other schools on here – you do need to get your DD on board tho.

OK so not just grades, the opportunities are better - you need to sell that to her then.

Bc after all a) (as a PP said) she needs to do well to pass the exam so she needs to be on board) and b) the school needs to be the one to make her happy.

Personally (and I speak as a swimmer) I have zero desire to swim the Channel but I assume there are other great opps, Tho it sounds as tho she has good opportunities where she is now.

I did say earlier I would not be thinking about a move if I were you; but you are not me and it sounds as though you are keen on these schools. Make sure you are clear as to why and discuss it with her. Go and look at the schools with her. See what she thinks.

If I’m going to pay for an independent school, I’d rather pay for the best one — it’s also beneficial for future reference, prestige, and applications for post-16 education and university. Am I wrong to think that way?

I would say yes you are wrong.

The best school is the one your DD will thrive in. That doesn’t necessarily mean the most prestigious school.

Have you looked round these schools or are you going only on rankings? Westminster has been a boys’ school - it is only recently coed below 6th form and not yet fully coed all the way through - wouldn’t be my pick for a girl. St Pauls is quite a particular style of school - which won’t suit everyone.

What would your DD’s commute be like if she went to these schools? Would she have school friends living nearby or not - this can make a huge difference to a teen.

Having St Pauls or Westminster on a CV doesn’t make a difference for jobs or university places. If anything, top universities are cautious about taking too many kids from the same few schools (looks bad), so could potentially harm her chances. Post-16 education offers will be based on her GCSE mocks and reports rather than what school she has been at.

it’s also beneficial for future reference, prestige, and applications for post-16 education and university. Am I wrong to think that way?

Let's hope you are. So you think the prestige of a specific private school will benefit a student in terms of university applications?

Sure, if the teaching and general atmosphere are conducive to higher A level grades (which are massively the main decider); if the HE advice is more targeted; if there is support to apply to Oxford that might be lacking in other schools – but (and if this is not what you mean I apologise – but it's what you say) the prestige of the school having an impact, so saying "I go to XXX top school therefore I should get a place at YYY top university" well I really hope we have moved away from that.

As I said, and while I agree it's important to support a child to do well, in fact do the best they can, I would be loath to move a happy child, other things being equal (ie paying fees in this case, journey to school, quality of current school overall, friends).

Is she in year 5 @wat2dodontkno? I assume so - in which case grade 4 and 6 on her instrument is fantastic. She is doing really well. What are the actual benefits of the possible alternative schools? If she is on target for top grades, which it sounds as tho she is, then another school is not going to help her to get anything higher.

It’s possible that part of the reason she’s doing so well is because she’s happy and motivated at her current school. If she’s forced into a move she doesn’t want and away from her friends then that is a risk.

She sounds like a wonderful kid.

Sometimes you just have to step in as parent and make the final decision.

At age 10 or 11 she does not have the life experience to judge what another school can offer her. She’s still a little girl. Lots of kids have nerves around secondary school - if there’s a safe known option then of course that’s going to seem highly attractive. It is a brilliant thing for your child’s self-esteem to move school and discover they can succeed in a new environment.

In your shoes, I’d definitely be finding the levers (and bribes!) to encourage her to attempt the 11+ and move to a better school - if St Paul’s is an option why wouldn’t you try for it?

I would however NOT prep her for the 11+. She has a busy life already if she’s working on grade 5 and grade 7 music and grade 6 Lamda. And she sounds “ready” academically.

I would certainly be cultivating a “gotta be in it, to win it” attitude with your dd. I always talk to my kids about seeing the opportunities in life as opening doors - you want to open as many doors as you can, whether that’s making friends or passing exams - the more open doors, the more choice you have.