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Missing sixth form for 2 days

63 replies

Urbangiraffe74 · 01/10/2025 08:09

Hi. Tricky topic. We pretty much never take our kids out of school, so they have always had very high attendance rates. However an opportunity came up that I found I couldn't say no to.

My 16 year old has loved a particular US pop star for several years. I tried to get him tickets for his last tour 2 years ago but missed out as they sold out so fast. This autumn he is touring again, playing the UK for just 4 dates. I managed to get 2 tickets for my son and I and gave them to him on his GCSE results day. He is so excited.

The concert is unfortunately mid week - there were no UK gig dates at the weekend. It's also several hours away from us as he's only playing 2 venues.

I thought that would mean one day out of school and that 6th form would be more relaxed on attendance, being more centred on self directed study.

In practice however, once I worked out the travel arrangements, I have realised it means 2 days out of 6th form.

He can of course study on the journey to and from London.

I'm wondering how to play it with the school. It's clearly leisure so won't fall within the 'exceptional circumstances' category. Do I fill in an application form anyway, knowing they will say no and disapprove and we, or he, may get in trouble? Or do we call him in sick those two days?

We have never done this before.

OP posts:
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Homeycombed · 02/10/2025 21:37

Harveere · 01/10/2025 11:59

if schools weren't so controlling it wouldn't happen. OP should be allowed to take this decision for her kid if on balance she thinks it's right (life is important too) but with plenty of schools that just lands a lot of shit on your plate. That's what's unbelievable.

Edited

This.

RealPinkFish · 02/10/2025 20:48

Urbangiraffe74 · 01/10/2025 08:09

Hi. Tricky topic. We pretty much never take our kids out of school, so they have always had very high attendance rates. However an opportunity came up that I found I couldn't say no to.

My 16 year old has loved a particular US pop star for several years. I tried to get him tickets for his last tour 2 years ago but missed out as they sold out so fast. This autumn he is touring again, playing the UK for just 4 dates. I managed to get 2 tickets for my son and I and gave them to him on his GCSE results day. He is so excited.

The concert is unfortunately mid week - there were no UK gig dates at the weekend. It's also several hours away from us as he's only playing 2 venues.

I thought that would mean one day out of school and that 6th form would be more relaxed on attendance, being more centred on self directed study.

In practice however, once I worked out the travel arrangements, I have realised it means 2 days out of 6th form.

He can of course study on the journey to and from London.

I'm wondering how to play it with the school. It's clearly leisure so won't fall within the 'exceptional circumstances' category. Do I fill in an application form anyway, knowing they will say no and disapprove and we, or he, may get in trouble? Or do we call him in sick those two days?

We have never done this before.

As someone who deals with all Sixth Form Attendance. Be honest. Nothing will happen. No fines. It will go own as unauthorised, but nothing will come from this.

HardworkSendHelp · 01/10/2025 23:08

As per my usual rants on these subjects while kissing the ground that I don’t have kids in crap prison schools in England🎉 Fill out no form! phone him in sick, go and enjoy the concert.

Doone22 · 01/10/2025 20:23

He no longer has a legal requirement for attendance any more surely?
Just tell the school he'll be out for 2 days and leave it at that.

Nomorechipsforme · 01/10/2025 20:07

Call in sick but make sure there isn't one of those cameras 🤔🤣😅🤣😅😅🤣x let's face it some opportunities are to good to miss and if you don't do it regularly then I don't see the issue. I hope he has which I am sure he will a fantastic life experience xxx

tennissquare · 01/10/2025 19:59

Coffeeismyfriend1 · 01/10/2025 18:54

Ask for two days of holiday, they may put it down as unauthorised but I think you only get
a fine for 10 or more registrations and he’ll only miss 4 in two days. Say it was a reward for good GCSE results and it was the only available dates.

Lying and saying they are ill will backfire as their mates will say ‘no he’s not, he’s gone to London to see e.g. Bryan Adam’s’ (or more relevant to young people artist 🤣) Trust me, I teach sixth form and they alway rat each other out.

Last week when I was setting a date for their presentation to the class one of mine said I’m not here on Monday and another said ‘yeah, he’s going to be ill’. He was going to a family
wedding at the weekend and wasn’t flying back until Sunday.

I remember saying to one of my form 10 year ago, ‘it’s odd how you always have a dentist appt on a Tuesday afternoon when Man City have a weeknight home game’ (I knew him and his dad had season tickets). When he left the school 5 year later and we were reminiscing on his time in my tutor group, he told me when he left ‘Miss, I had to tell my Dad, we can’t do it anymore Mrs X has rumbled us’ 🤣

There are no fines in sixth form. Sixth form attendance is not reported to the DfE in the way school attendance is - Reception to year 11.

Ceceprincess80 · 01/10/2025 19:30

Urbangiraffe74 · 01/10/2025 08:09

Hi. Tricky topic. We pretty much never take our kids out of school, so they have always had very high attendance rates. However an opportunity came up that I found I couldn't say no to.

My 16 year old has loved a particular US pop star for several years. I tried to get him tickets for his last tour 2 years ago but missed out as they sold out so fast. This autumn he is touring again, playing the UK for just 4 dates. I managed to get 2 tickets for my son and I and gave them to him on his GCSE results day. He is so excited.

The concert is unfortunately mid week - there were no UK gig dates at the weekend. It's also several hours away from us as he's only playing 2 venues.

I thought that would mean one day out of school and that 6th form would be more relaxed on attendance, being more centred on self directed study.

In practice however, once I worked out the travel arrangements, I have realised it means 2 days out of 6th form.

He can of course study on the journey to and from London.

I'm wondering how to play it with the school. It's clearly leisure so won't fall within the 'exceptional circumstances' category. Do I fill in an application form anyway, knowing they will say no and disapprove and we, or he, may get in trouble? Or do we call him in sick those two days?

We have never done this before.

He is poorly then

Coffeeismyfriend1 · 01/10/2025 18:54

Ask for two days of holiday, they may put it down as unauthorised but I think you only get
a fine for 10 or more registrations and he’ll only miss 4 in two days. Say it was a reward for good GCSE results and it was the only available dates.

Lying and saying they are ill will backfire as their mates will say ‘no he’s not, he’s gone to London to see e.g. Bryan Adam’s’ (or more relevant to young people artist 🤣) Trust me, I teach sixth form and they alway rat each other out.

Last week when I was setting a date for their presentation to the class one of mine said I’m not here on Monday and another said ‘yeah, he’s going to be ill’. He was going to a family
wedding at the weekend and wasn’t flying back until Sunday.

I remember saying to one of my form 10 year ago, ‘it’s odd how you always have a dentist appt on a Tuesday afternoon when Man City have a weeknight home game’ (I knew him and his dad had season tickets). When he left the school 5 year later and we were reminiscing on his time in my tutor group, he told me when he left ‘Miss, I had to tell my Dad, we can’t do it anymore Mrs X has rumbled us’ 🤣

DublinLaLaLa · 01/10/2025 18:01

I work in a school with a 6th form. Just tell the truth. We don’t care if attendance is usually good. If he told me, I’d email him the PowerPoints I’d used in any lessons over those two days. If he missed a timed essay (or similar) I’d expect him to catch up in his frees. Enjoy the gig!

Justletmemoveon · 01/10/2025 18:00

I took my kids out of school to see Taylor Swift and just emailed the absence addresses and said that’s why they weren’t in. Nobody contacted us about it.. it was only one day, although they also went in late next morning as we had to travel. It was fine.

Thulpelly · 01/10/2025 17:56

Call in sick. 100%.

He will get in trouble and will be treated as a truancy if you are honest.

ColesCorner7814 · 01/10/2025 17:41

My DD is at sixth form. Massive F1 fan and we went to Silverstone for weekend as a birthday treat for my DH. It meant having Friday and Monday off. I just told them it was a really important trip. They can’t fine you. They’ll get over it and you’ll have had a great time!

Jonnybigwallet · 01/10/2025 17:09

Tell them he's sick!

MrsAvocet · 01/10/2025 15:49

It won't be authorised but there are no fines in 6th form (and even lower down the school it's very unlikely that 2 days unauthorised absence would be subject to a fine unless it's a recurrent issue). What's the worse that will happen? The boy will have 4 sessions recorded as unauthorised absence. If he is a good student with an otherwise excellent attendance record a one off absence is hardly likely to attract major sanctions. There'll be a bit of catching up to do but presumably he can get notes off his classmates and complete any homework that's been set once he gets home.
If you are happy that this trip is in your son's best interests, just do it OP. But have the courage of your convictions and be up front about it.

tennissquare · 01/10/2025 15:12

Sixth form attendance isn’t reported to the DfE and there are no fines so it’s far more relaxed although they wont agree to it as authorised.

dottiehens · 01/10/2025 13:40

Visiting universities abroad?

TheJessops · 01/10/2025 13:04

Harveere · 01/10/2025 11:59

if schools weren't so controlling it wouldn't happen. OP should be allowed to take this decision for her kid if on balance she thinks it's right (life is important too) but with plenty of schools that just lands a lot of shit on your plate. That's what's unbelievable.

Edited

If she thinks it's right then she shouldn't lie. However she is still breaking the rules (although is she in sixth form?) so if the school gets cross they have a right to be cross. Education is exceptionally important, one of the most important things in life, and the amount of time people take off for silly things (I don't think OP's thing is silly) is astonishing, on top of the lying too!

There are girls and women literally dying to be educated in some countries, we should be falling over ourselves to get our kids to what is largely free and good education for all.

Suffolker · 01/10/2025 12:20

We did this earlier this year. In our case, the concert had originally been booked for a weekend date over a year earlier, but was then postponed to a Tuesday. Highly inconvenient but DD was not going to give up the tickets. We haven’t once taken any time off for holidays or time off during term, and her attendance is excellent. But I still phoned her in sick (it went against the grain but I viewed it very much as a one off, which she totally understood).

Moveoverdarlin · 01/10/2025 12:16

I’m really anti taking kids out of school, but in these circumstances I would just call in sick. It won’t put him in an awkward position if he’s in sixth form. He’s not like a six year old who will get in a pickle with lying.

PastaAllaNorma · 01/10/2025 12:10

In my experience they won't care. I've taken all 3 out of sixth form for different reasons.

I booked Hamilton far enough in advance that they hadn't released the half term dates yet. I guessed wrong. I told 6th Form and their response was "lucky things, have a great time!"

Same when it was Harry Styles and being invited to a recording session at Radio 4 (doing Media A-level)

LikeStrawberriesAndCream · 01/10/2025 12:10

I'd just call in sick tbh.

REP22 · 01/10/2025 12:08

Go, but don't lie. It was all hushed up by the media of course😉 , but I understand two notable liars upstanding pillars of the US corporate community were recently caught on camera in the audience at a Coldplay concert, which may not have gone terribly well for them.

Cynic17 · 01/10/2025 12:06

Well, obviously, he doesn't go! Sixth Form is short enough as it is, and A levels are hugely important. And it won't be many years before he's in work, so he needs to understand that you can't just bunk off whenever you feel like it.

Stoneblock · 01/10/2025 12:03

The school will follow their process and it will likely be unauthorised, but no individual will really care. Don't lie, it will take the edge off his trip if he has to try and keep it secret.