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Original poster

Sending a child to the best secondary Vs the nearest school

31 replies

Losoph · 14/09/2025 15:11

Having a bit of a dilemma and wonder how many people here put the quality of education first before any other consideration.

I have an opportunity to send my DD to the best school in town - not catchment but I teach there. It is a very strict free school (silent corridors, dedicated reading time, calm atmosphere, disruption dealt with super efficiently). I strongly believe the school is great and serves it's purpose of educating kids well, particularly from a very deprived area (inner city).
My DD would receive great education in a disruption free environment. There are some negatives however

  • school day ends late-4pm for all students and I would not let her come back on her own in the first two years. We walk/cycle through a rather rough patch of the city and my DD is tiny. This means she would have to wait for me often till punishing 5pm.
  • sports facilities are awful, only a tiny courtyard to use. No real pitches, etc and my DD loves football and other sports
  • when she makes new friends, they will all live far- I will end up driving her around
  • very academic, so only traditional subjects to choose for GCSE
-i may end up tied to the school for longer than wish for Our catchment school is a large comprehensive, 'good' according to Ofsted but the behaviour is just as in many schools (a lot of isolations, exclusions, etc). The results are fine, not as good as in my school but fine. A part of me really wants to provide my child with a normal teen experiences that I had as a child
  • she can walk to and from the school with her friends, half of the estate end up in that school.
-She will make friends who will most likely live locally so they can see each other after school- she is big on being outside.
  • they have tones of after school activities and sports to choose from.
  • wider GCSE subject choices
In general, my DD and then my son who will go to a secondary a year later are pretty good kids who are obedient, well mannered and do their homework without nagging. I wonder if they really need all these routines that are designed to support the children from unprivileged backgrounds. I hope they can do well anywhere. But some part of me worry that I may make a wrong decision which will impact their life😏
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Thepeopleversuswork · 25/09/2025 21:00

I would go for the academic school because the environment sounds much more conducive to learning. The only caveat would be if the curriculum is too rigid to allow any strictly non traditional courses at all. Do you mean that they don’t offer art, for example? Or just that they don’t do things like digital media?

But for me education is too important to risk not getting the best school you can. Yes, the social aspect will need more thought but they will find a way around it.

I am in a minority though clearly.

Persephoneofhell · 25/09/2025 14:44

In this situation local.
It sounds like your local is fine and your children would have local friends.
Obviously your school is strict to deal with the local demographic from what you describe.
So how do you really feel about your child being mixed socially with that demographic? How much do you really know about the local community?
I ask because we have one school near us that is very strict for that reason ( also gets great results). But socially issues have existed outside school and I certainly know of some very upset middle class parents when their child started smoking cannabis around the local rough estate.
You are no doubt able to support education at home. So go local and if needed tutor. But do a tour and see what is in place and also if it even needs to be as strict.

Original poster
Losoph · 17/09/2025 23:09

Loads of very useful comments, interesting that the overwhelming majority would go for the local school. Though I do appreciate the merits of my school...I am curious of what my daughter says when we visit both schools.

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PrincessOfPreschool · 17/09/2025 20:06

DeafLeppard · 17/09/2025 09:32

That's not how it works.

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OK. That's what I understood from MN. How does it work?

FleurDeFleur · 17/09/2025 09:42

Go for your school.
She can always do football and other hobbies at a club. It's far better to have an education which isn't constantly interrupted and dominated by a negative few.

redskydelight · 17/09/2025 09:36

Local school unless it is awful, which it sounds like it isn't.

Another point to consider is what happens if you change schools. Sounds like it will become a logistical nightmare.

DeafLeppard · 17/09/2025 09:32

PrincessOfPreschool · 17/09/2025 07:59

You also get the benefit at a less academic school of universities taking that into account. If they see your school has a 4.7 average at GCSE and you managed to get so much higher, it will work in your favour. Even if you do sixth form elsewhere.

That's not how it works.

DeafLeppard · 17/09/2025 09:32

In this scenario we went for the better school. Transport is a PITA and we do a fair amount of faciliating friends by driving, but DD is now nailing public transport and that alone has given her life skills she wouldn't have gotten locally. We both work close to school so can help if worst comes to worst.

She loves her school and it was absolutely the right decision. Local comp is awful - inadequate, high staff turnover, no maths teachers etc. It's definitely turning itself around but I wasn't going to sacrifice 3 years of secondary education whilst it got its act together.

sashh · 17/09/2025 09:21

Losoph · 14/09/2025 16:00

Thank you! I am really considering it! I want them to be happy as much as I want them to do well..

And that is something parents often forget. The happiness of the child. You only get one childhood.

Also she will never bee in a class you are teaching.

Clearinguptheclutter · 17/09/2025 08:04

Local school, unless you have serious concerns about it which it sounds like you don’t

PrincessOfPreschool · 17/09/2025 07:59

You also get the benefit at a less academic school of universities taking that into account. If they see your school has a 4.7 average at GCSE and you managed to get so much higher, it will work in your favour. Even if you do sixth form elsewhere.

Hazlenuts2016 · 16/09/2025 20:44

Local school, definitely. Never underestimate the amount of stress getting to and from school can cause if you are not nearby. Plus the social aspect!

Original poster
Losoph · 16/09/2025 20:34

Very interesting views, and I am slightly torn. Planning on not only doing open evenings, but will book the tour of the local school to see how they manage behaviour, etc
Our progress 8 was excellent last year, no progress 8 this year (COVID kids) though results overall were poorer this year for various reasons.
The other school had lower progress 8 score but still positive.
My kids are bright and well- behaved (though I cannot rule out it may change under peer influence at either school)
From a mother perspective, I absolutely love watching them spending all afternoons playing outside with their mates from the estate and would like this to continue when they are in secondary ...it will be cut short if they end up at my school and have to wait for me😏

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purpleme12 · 16/09/2025 20:08

Well if it was me, and going by your post, I think the nearer school sounds better

Realsanter · 16/09/2025 09:02

I would go for the inner city school. But I would have been fine moving to the city so it would allow easy walking distance too - I don't think a village is great for raising teens in anyway and curbs their independence.

CosyMintFish · 15/09/2025 22:02

I would go for your school. In a heartbeat.

they only get one shot at education. Many schools are plagued by disruptive behaviour, and children aren’t able to access the teaching because other pupils are sucking away the airtime.

Look at the progress 8 scores. This is the really important thing, not the headline GCSE scores, which often reflect the level of disadvantage in the local area and the performance of primary schools. If your school is a point or more ahead of the local one at GCSE in progress 8 I don’t know why you’d even look at the local one!

PrincessOfPreschool · 15/09/2025 21:56

I would go local. My DC have just finished GCSEs at local 'dodgy' school 10 mins walk. The GCSE grade average is 4.7 and loads of exclusions, plus swapping difficult children with the other local comp. My DS got 6 grade 9s and 3 grade 7s, my DD got 7 grade 8s and 2 grade 7s. My point being, if your DC work and are quite bright, they can succeed even in schools which aren't overall great in their grades.

I think the wide subject choices are important as well as the sports and social aspect - an education that is more than just training them to get good grades in Maths, English and sciences. I would definitely go for overall experience and if things are going really badly then maybe you could move them later.

JumpingThroughGaps · 15/09/2025 21:38

Id go for your school. You know it’s an excellent school with very effective behaviour management, the other one is a gamble as it’s clearly not got the same approach to behaviour management.

Original poster
Losoph · 14/09/2025 19:58

@RandomUsernameHere won't move closer as we live on the outskirts, village location. My school is in the town centre, run down and rough. We are massively oversubscribed - catchment covers around 800metres.
We are happy where we are.

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RandomUsernameHere · 14/09/2025 17:38

Could you move closer to the better school? It would make sense if both your children can go there and you work there.

ErrolTheDragon · 14/09/2025 17:29

HawaiiWake · 14/09/2025 17:14

Go to Open day with your daughter and see her reactions. Peer group is important and you would let her walk on her own into house or social with pals as you come home later. Or she can use the 1 hour to do homework and relax at home. Depends on DC preference?

Yes - at this stage, if you’ve got a sensible child and 2 alternatives which you’re happy with, then let the child have a say.
fwiw we had 3 options we were happy with; dd opted for the grammar school in the next town requiring being out of the house at 7:30 and similarly home significantly later than if she’d gone to the local school (good ‘leafy comp’). Because it was her choice she adapted to this well and it absolutely suited her.

The question of whether you’d be tied to the school longer than you might otherwise have been is for you to decide first.

AudiobookListener · 14/09/2025 17:26

Unless your kids can get to the free school independently and stay there if you leave, then it'd be a no from me, simply because you will be stuck there and if you are are ever long-term ill it will be doubly stressful for everyone in the family.

HawaiiWake · 14/09/2025 17:14

Go to Open day with your daughter and see her reactions. Peer group is important and you would let her walk on her own into house or social with pals as you come home later. Or she can use the 1 hour to do homework and relax at home. Depends on DC preference?

clary · 14/09/2025 17:08

When you say only traditional subjects for GCSE – what do you mean? Does this exclude drama, music and DT and PE? Or do you just mean there is no creative media or animal care Btec?

If it's the creative GCSEs, I do think a creative outlet is a good idea – all my 3 took at least one from my first list.

I agree being close to friends is keen for a teen. Also it's better if they can go home independently at year 7 tbh.

No sports facilities for a DC who loves sports is another big negative.

Original poster
Losoph · 14/09/2025 16:30

Agree with you all. The local comprehensive seems absolutely fine. I will go to the open evening and perhaps book a tour around the school to get the feel for their behaviour management and how the curriculum is delivered. But it really does sound like the teens social life is important and I have to consider it when making the choice! Thank you all

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