Page 2 | Tiffin girls school

igglepiggleadventures · 2025-04-10T09:28:00+00:00

Changed my username so it's not too outing. Child has a place at Tiffin Girls school that we have not been able to reject yet. She also has an accepted independent school place - not going to say where but really a top 10 school in the UK. Ranking isn't so important to us but we know she needs to be in an academic environment and stretched. DH and I always thought she would be better placed in an independent school, she is quite relaxed and needs to be challenged. She is bright and resilient, but not competitive at all and as a summer born still quite immature and needs a nurturing environment. She needs to be told to get things done. At least as parents that's what we thought and why we accepted the senior school of our choice. She has been going to a private school since reception and we have been very happy with all the school had to offer. However DD is not so excited about the independent school. She wants to go to Tiffin. I think it comes from peer pressure (because everybody thinks it's such a great achievement) and a close friend going too. Also logistically very straightforward to commute, so she doesn't understand why we wouldn't let her go there. I don't think she understands well what differences there could be between a state and an independent school. School fees have always been a stretch but we still can afford it. The current economic climate does worry me because what if one of us loses a job? There is no inheritance or support we could get from grandparents. WWYD? I don't want to lose a term's fee so if we change our mind we need to make it now.

lovekittens · 11/04/2025 10:43

Any post holder events coming up to ask just questions? Or ask for an adhoc tour? The annual tour is in July which is probably too late

Kuretake · 11/04/2025 10:43

JamesWebbSpaceTelescope · 11/04/2025 10:34

I’m always slightly suspicious of stories like this from friends. Did they really ask him to leave in his U6 year solely for low results or was there something else that they don’t want to admit to? I wouldn’t just take the parents word for this, they really want to save face and not admit it was for drugs/ misbehaving.

Even in independent schools there are processes to follow asking someone to leave.

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I know someone who this happened to - no idea how common it is.

labradorservant · 11/04/2025 10:42

Have you looked at the website? Been on an open day? Looked at insta. They will shout about these things in there. Those are all offerings even my local school does. Maybe not as fancy and advanced but they do happen. And as for 6 form they will need to meet certain grade requirements in some subjects (like grade 7 for alevel maths etc). As for the year 12 outreach programmes, being from a state school doesn’t just make the grade anymore, parents need to have not gone to uni, FSM etc!

Tiswa · 11/04/2025 10:36

I would say the main thing is that if she/you don’t like Tiffin given I get the impression it isn’t one of the really competitive independent ones (Putney/Wimbledon) then you should be able to move - perhaps talk to the school I suspect turning down a place for a grammar is a fairly expected and see what the process would be so you have a safety net.

from my grammar (Sutton not tiffin) lots of music opportunities different things and a concert per term. Drama as well lots of co-curricular- it is very important to the parents (live in the heart of Sutton grammar). Not sure on sport DD has never gone near a sports club and only has a vague idea that it exists!

My advice is to give it a go and if it works great if it doesn’t moving to independent won’t be an issue and could even do it at year 9 intake (City of Freemans definitely does a 13+) and then you will know

JamesWebbSpaceTelescope · 11/04/2025 10:34

Mumofteenandtween · 11/04/2025 10:23

This.

I am always very suspicious of private schools with very strong results ever since the son of family friends of ours was asked to leave his “top private school” at the Easter of his Upper Sixth Year. He had to take his A levels as some kind of external candidate at the local college.

On one level - I have some sympathy - he was a total slacker who did no work and ended up with a C and 2 Ds when he had the ability to get so much higher.

On the other hand - he had been at the school and its associated prep since he was 3 years old so maybe the school had a teeny tiny bit of responsibility for his lack of motivation.

School was then in the local papers for their “best ever results”.

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I’m always slightly suspicious of stories like this from friends. Did they really ask him to leave in his U6 year solely for low results or was there something else that they don’t want to admit to? I wouldn’t just take the parents word for this, they really want to save face and not admit it was for drugs/ misbehaving.

Even in independent schools there are processes to follow asking someone to leave.

Original poster

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 10:34

I heard TGS sixth form also asks girls to leave if they don't meet some standards, from local mums with older children. Which was not what I was expecting from a state school, but I don't even know if that's true.

@bettyjane thanks for another excellent point. Also I did notice a LOT of Tiffin girls go to study medicine and good universities. Very impressive destinations overall.

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bettyjane · 11/04/2025 10:30

One thing maybe worth considering for further down the line - lots of university outreach opportunities etc that are offered to year 12s, and can be really useful for boosting knowledge and experience, are limited to state school applicants. So there’s a chunk of super-curricular stuff that would be more accessible if she goes to a state grammar.

phyllidafosset · 11/04/2025 10:25

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 10:20

I'm taking in all the feedback, thank you. Apologies if my comment about focus on academics offended anyone - for me it's one observation from what's been discussed above. Not many really suggested anything extra curricular, but many commenting on rankings or how academic it is or how difficult it is to get into..

So Tiffin is great academically, and it will be much easier to move to an independent school if it doesn't work out (than vice versa). Being local will have a positive impact on friendships. Potential resentment if DD doesn't like the independent school. These are great consideration points for me.

Think I wanted to hear about provisions outside of academics in these great grammar schools.. what can I expect to be offered? Opportunities for sports matches. how good are the school orchestras/ensembles and how often they play together.. how much opportunity for drama and to be on stage (or work behind the stage).. are there team building trips beg of year 7.. do they have an actual MFL speaker who teaches them the language.. do they have sufficient opportunities for lab work in science.. any debating workshops or lessons.. what about textiles.. design.. technology.. or food tech.. just to name a few from my narrow experience. I wanted to get some assurance that Tiffin Girls offer things like that too.. at a decent level at least if not the same as fee-paying schools.

Edited

You have made your decision. My DD’s super selective grammar had all of those things but it is disingenuous to ask if a state school with much less funding will have them to the same level because they clearly won’t. You know that already. But did the girls have the opportunity to take part in those activities to an equally high level? Of course they did, but some of it was outside school - because the parents wanted the best for their kids and worked to give them those opportunities.

You know you want private because you think it is best, so let the Tiffin place go and tell your DD.

Mumofteenandtween · 11/04/2025 10:23

phyllidafosset · 11/04/2025 09:59

It may mean that the parents have less money to pay for additional tutoring.It may also mean they are less able to select out the less able kids. I am not saying that all private school pupils have additional tutoring or that all private schools will select out kids, but you should never rely uniquely on league tables.

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This.

I am always very suspicious of private schools with very strong results ever since the son of family friends of ours was asked to leave his “top private school” at the Easter of his Upper Sixth Year. He had to take his A levels as some kind of external candidate at the local college.

On one level - I have some sympathy - he was a total slacker who did no work and ended up with a C and 2 Ds when he had the ability to get so much higher.

On the other hand - he had been at the school and its associated prep since he was 3 years old so maybe the school had a teeny tiny bit of responsibility for his lack of motivation.

School was then in the local papers for their “best ever results”.

Original poster

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 10:23

And don't get me wrong I really want to switch my mind and choose Tiffin and get it done with, but really struggling to find good reasons to justify that decision. DD wanting to go there is so big I need to persuade myself.

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Original poster

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 10:20

I'm taking in all the feedback, thank you. Apologies if my comment about focus on academics offended anyone - for me it's one observation from what's been discussed above. Not many really suggested anything extra curricular, but many commenting on rankings or how academic it is or how difficult it is to get into..

So Tiffin is great academically, and it will be much easier to move to an independent school if it doesn't work out (than vice versa). Being local will have a positive impact on friendships. Potential resentment if DD doesn't like the independent school. These are great consideration points for me.

Think I wanted to hear about provisions outside of academics in these great grammar schools.. what can I expect to be offered? Opportunities for sports matches. how good are the school orchestras/ensembles and how often they play together.. how much opportunity for drama and to be on stage (or work behind the stage).. are there team building trips beg of year 7.. do they have an actual MFL speaker who teaches them the language.. do they have sufficient opportunities for lab work in science.. any debating workshops or lessons.. what about textiles.. design.. technology.. or food tech.. just to name a few from my narrow experience. I wanted to get some assurance that Tiffin Girls offer things like that too.. at a decent level at least if not the same as fee-paying schools.

OP posts:

phyllidafosset · 11/04/2025 10:18

lovekittens · 11/04/2025 10:12

Agree not to use league tables on its own. It is a factor, along with university destinations, pastoral care, extra curricular exposures etc

If money isn’t an issue, then surely the top 10 independent school is comparable Tiffin. I don’t think it’s an easy decision. It isn’t clear to be that Tiffin is a no browner like others have said

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I think the point is that Tiffin is a no brainer because it is comparable and it is free. And everyone at both schools will be seeking to do their best to create happy, rounded, successful (whatever that means) human beings. And you can never be sure what will suit your child best.

Just to add, if the DD’s preference was the private, and the fees were manageable, and the parents preferred it, I would have suggested that.

lovekittens · 11/04/2025 10:12

Trumpsgoneloco · 11/04/2025 10:04

I am not saying that all private school pupils have additional tutoring or that all private schools will select out kids, but you should never rely uniquely on league tables.

this

Agree not to use league tables on its own. It is a factor, along with university destinations, pastoral care, extra curricular exposures etc

If money isn’t an issue, then surely the top 10 independent school is comparable Tiffin. I don’t think it’s an easy decision. It isn’t clear to be that Tiffin is a no browner like others have said

Araminta1003 · 11/04/2025 10:10

Be careful with the Times list. Only look at GCSE results for Tiffin. A lot of top girls schools lose some of the very best girld in Sixth Form to co-eds. Quite often they are creamed off by boys grammars going coed in Sixth Form.

labradorservant · 11/04/2025 10:05

I do think there is a worry about it being a state school (despite it being the Harrods of state schools). I think by paying the fees OP can feel like she has done her best and the school has some accountability. I sent my children from a fee paying primary to the local non grammar state schools (we do have a grammar). They are very well adjusted kids. They have a wide circle of friends as their primary cohort go to all sorts of schools. They’ve had great trips. My DS has offers from great unis, the only Oxbridge offer people he knows this year went to his state school. Another friend’s child went to a school his parents chose. It didn’t end well, and is now at the local school (child’s preferred choice).

Trumpsgoneloco · 11/04/2025 10:04

I am not saying that all private school pupils have additional tutoring or that all private schools will select out kids, but you should never rely uniquely on league tables.

this

phyllidafosset · 11/04/2025 09:59

lovekittens · 11/04/2025 09:55

But is it that good .. if they get the brightest girls in year 7 (more than any other school) but then isn’t in the top 40 academically in the times list? As the poster says … is the school giving value added?

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It may mean that the parents have less money to pay for additional tutoring.It may also mean they are less able to select out the less able kids. I am not saying that all private school pupils have additional tutoring or that all private schools will select out kids, but you should never rely uniquely on league tables.

lovekittens · 11/04/2025 09:55

Tiswa · 11/04/2025 09:52

For academics Tiffin will be much better - it just will it is academically that good.

Tiffin is hardly your average state school comp is it - and right now most importantly it’s where your DD wants to go.

here is the thing I suspect that if Tiffin doesn’t work you can move her to that independent school (or another one) because ultimately they are a business and they need the fees. Quite a few tend to have a 13+ intake anyway so you could easily move then

You can’t the other way round

But is it that good .. if they get the brightest girls in year 7 (more than any other school) but then isn’t in the top 40 academically in the times list? As the poster says … is the school giving value added?

Tiswa · 11/04/2025 09:55

Nope not at all - Grammar parents tend to be very focused on extra curricular options many come from private school primarys. Music/Drama/Sports/Science etc

Ultimately though if you don’t take into account your daughters views on this it will lead to resentment - by all means discuss with her but the one who has to live with the decision is her. Remember that

phyllidafosset · 11/04/2025 09:54

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 09:48

I also worry the parent body at Tiffin Girls could have a culture too narrowly focused on academics rather than bringing up a whole child. I do sense it from some comments here..

You seem to have already made this decision. There is no evidence on this thread to suggest this. It is a rather offensive thing to say, to be frank.

I’m not sure why you posted because you have clearly already decided your DD should go to private so just tell her and let her get used to the idea.

Tiswa · 11/04/2025 09:52

For academics Tiffin will be much better - it just will it is academically that good.

Tiffin is hardly your average state school comp is it - and right now most importantly it’s where your DD wants to go.

here is the thing I suspect that if Tiffin doesn’t work you can move her to that independent school (or another one) because ultimately they are a business and they need the fees. Quite a few tend to have a 13+ intake anyway so you could easily move then

You can’t the other way round

Original poster

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 09:48

I also worry the parent body at Tiffin Girls could have a culture too narrowly focused on academics rather than bringing up a whole child. I do sense it from some comments here..

OP posts:

Original poster

igglepiggleadventures · 11/04/2025 09:40

Thank you all, all great points.

The unnamed independent school is top in academics, of course less selective at entry (because not everyone can afford it) but has better output than Tiffin Girls so there is value add. There are quite a few schools like this in London.
Though I'm not just about the academics, because for that, I'm pretty sure for that both schools will be fine.
During the primary years DD had a lot of great opportunities in her private school, lots of encouragement for her to get out of her comfort zone and try different things. The school had a lot to offer in terms of music, art, sports and drama and much more - more trips, workshops, additional engagements with their own senior school and it was just fantastic. The experience has really been enriching and we've been very very happy about it and it's what I fear she will lose in a state school. Also as working parents it has been so straightforward to communicate with the school whenever there was a concern.
Of course money can buy a lot of those outside of school but there are so many I wouldn't even know to try offering to DD because I am not an educator. Also being encouraged by mum and being encouraged by teachers or peer group in school would be felt different to DD.
Hence DH and my preference for the other school.. it's just known to do all these things, at an even higher level than DD's current senior school (which is why we're not staying).

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Trumpsgoneloco · 11/04/2025 09:38

A top 10 independent school in London is presumably also highly selective and broadly similar in that way.

I know a fair few who get into these but not the London grammar's every year.

Trumpsgoneloco · 11/04/2025 09:36

I always thought Tiffin was seen as better then most independents academically.