School constantly asking daughter questions

This would be my line of thought.
I also have to say that 3 slices of toast and 3 hash browns is a pretty odd breakfast. I would bet that a concerned friend of the girl has confided in a teacher and that the OP is only getting half a story. Always bear in mind that eating disorder is a psychological condition and those suffering from it can be really devious.

Also if she was bullied children are very nasty eith rumours that kind of thing could trigger this.

Her just snacking as lunch at school is probably a cause for concern alone. My dd is on a reduced time table, comes home 30 minutes after lunch, she wanted to eat a hot meal at home but wasn't allowed as they need to see them eating.

I would say that teenagers are very good at hiding this stuff. I used to put a few cornflakes in a bowl and a dash of milk and put it in the sink so mum thought I ate breakfast. I also took a slice of bread and slid some crumbs into an empty lunch box so mum thought I'd eaten lunch. I'm not saying that your daughter is doing this type of thing but eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental health disorder and the school are right to take any concerns very seriously.

Op school staff are duty bound to report concerns. Teachers are required to log any concerns however small because it's not our job to judge if things are OK or not. I have logged on our safeguarding system kids that never have lunch, that I've seen throwing food away, kids who suddenly seem much thinner, kids who regularly sit alone etc. We also have an anonymous system where kids can log concerns and sometimes they do log concerns about their friends. The questions are because we are duty bound to check. Please don't take such huge offence. How are we to know which kids do have eating disorders and which ones don't without checks.

As others have said, ring and ask for someone on the safeguarding team to let you know what prompted the questions. Surely whatever it was prompted enough concern that they checked up on it....so wouldn't you be concerned too? You seem to have reacted as if they a criticising your parenting or something.

When I taught, I occasionally spotted a pupil who seemed to be losing weight although very slim and who looked tired and lethargic. I reported it to the HOH each time. On two occasions the pupil had an eating disorder and tried to hide it by wearing baggy clothes. Their parents hadn't noticed and we're glad the school had. One pupil had an illness but hadn't let the school know.
I wouldn't go in raging but contact the pastoral teacher expressing concern and listen to what they say

Pull up those judgy pants as high as you can

I'm sure you are perfect but you must surely know that many people eat toast and hash browns. There's no need for your rudeness.

Well said

This. Rather than getting angry with the school, talk to them. They are clearly concerned about something and it is widely recognised that parents often cannot see issues in their own children.

Request a meeting, and tell your dd you will get to the bottom of it. Listen to their concerns and respond accordingly.

I agree with this - you need to ask what happened and what prompted the questioning.

3 slices of toast and 3 hash browns is a really crap breakfast, where is the protein? It’s just fatty carby crap.

This is why I am glad I am not a teacher.

you have automatically assumed the school is in the wrong without trying to find out any more information.

Is the school really ‘constantly’ asking your daughter questions, or did someone speak to her once? There is a lot of hyperbole in your posts - it feels like you are absorbing your daughters emotions rather than being the calm adult in this.

establish the facts before you leap.

I agree. The OP hasn't explained what they have done - if anything - to address it with school.

The governors would want to know what the OP has done to address it with staff first.

I’m Pastoral Care. My take is that someone at school, probably a friend, has noticed that your DD doesn’t have a meal at lunch time. You said that she snacks. The friend has probably seen this, noticed that your DD is slimmer than most and been concerned. The pastoral team will then try to ascertain if your DD eats at home.
My advice would be to find out who she spoke to and call them to discuss further. Definitely let them know that she was upset afterwards as this would not have been their intention so they need to be made aware.

Don’t be so dramatic!
OP - First step is to contact whomever your DD told you was asking her the questions to get their side of the tale.

Absolutely this.

I had a child in my form who was bulimic, parents were oblivious as she was 'eating normally'. Other pupils raised the alarm after realising she was throwing up at school.

I would suspect that someone, either a classmate or teacher have raised a concern about your DD. You need to keep calm and phone tomorrow and ask to speak to her Head of Year. It's not unreasonable for the school to ask her questions and I would be careful of taking your DDs word that they were 'firing questions' and wait until you've had some sort of explanation from the school.

I don’t think teachers do this kind of thing for no reason. They are clearly worried about something. Is she generally well cared for? Clean with clean clothes etc? Is she very very slim? I think teachers are probably used to seeing a range of kids so I think I think your DD would have to be a notable outlier somewhere for a concern to be raised.

Just have a calm chat with her teacher about it. Tbh imo it’s good that schools take note. We’ve seen too many cases of neglect just slipping under the radar.

This is very poor safeguarding practice. Safeguarding 101 is not to ask leading questions or the child's answers can't actually be used as evidence. If they had a genuine pupil in need here and were looking for signs that she was being left at home alone by herself, they would've just blown it (although 14 should be well old enough to be at home alone). They shouldn't be quizzing her about her eating habits like that either.

I'd ask to speak to the head of year or one of the deputy heads and ask what happened, but go in with an open mind that it might have upset her and seemed worse than it actually was. Is it possible they've got a report of a girl who looks like her who is meeting someone inappropriate after school and they've misidentified the pupil as your daughter, for example? These are the sort of things I'd want to know from the school.

You need to follow the school's processes. Do not contact the governors. I'm a governor and if you raised this I'd be sending it straight back and telling you to raise it through the normal channels. Their role is strategic, not operational.

Email the school and ask what's going on and tell your daughter I it happens again to tell the teacher or who ever it is that they need to call you or her dad, that's she's already answered these questions. I remember being pulled out of class by our principle who was a nun and being quizzed about the fact my parents were separated, asking questions about if they had new partners and who did I live with. It was very odd questioning for a 10 year old.

Where's it come from op ? Someone has clearly expressed a concern