Shouted at daughters bully

Yup. I don't even know if you're being sarcy but it's exactly what I'd do. In fact, if I had contact with the school, I'd tell them what will happen if they allow the kid to hurt mine (again). They can try and reprimand me for saying it, but they'd have to admit they have allowed my child to be harmed by their bullies in order to report me.

This. I’d definitely go for finding the kid when they are on their own though, even if you have to lie in wait somewhere. And threatening them in a low voice, no need for shouting, and no witnesses to overhear.

Op, I would email the school asap saying the bullying has escalated.

Acknowledge you shouldn’t have shouted at the girl but you were at the end of your tether and need their help to stop the bullying. The fat comments are particularly alarming as you don’t want dd to become anorexic.

Good luck and hope you get it sorted.

I don't think a video of you telling them to leave your kid alone and pointing out the things they say to her will make them look great tbh so they'd be thick as mince to do anything with it. Though they may spread it around for clout.

I hope things stay peaceful for her op. If there is one main ringleader and the school are able to deal with her hopefully that will knock it on the head.

I have worked for decades in secondary education and bullying occurs in all schools and can be very hard to deal with. I once sat in on a meeting when the headteacher told a ringleader like the girl in this school in the OPs posts if she spoke to or went near the victim again he would permanently exclude her. Could not have been clearer. The girl ignored him and carried on. Her parents removed her because the head was in the process of carrying out his promise.
I always advise children who are being victimised to do everything they can to stay in safe places with other children, if they have friends stay with them.
Also and I know when parents are angry this is unwelcome advice, please email or phone for an appointment, please don't go to the school and expect to be seen. We just don't have a lot of staff available. And I don't think waiting for up to an hour is going to make you feel better.

Maybe not your best move, but it's done now, do rather than recoil and shrink, take ownership, be proud, and say yes I did that, so? Moving forward, be proactive, have you asked for another appointment with HoY, to let everyone know you are following up on it all?

Have you been up to the school and asked them to sort it? Every single time my DS12 now has issues with bullying boys (sane group of arseholes) I record it on email and get the school to sort it. My DS is a bit of a target as he's ADHD and likely autistic and bullies can sniff these children out from miles away. Good luck

I wouldn't worry about the police taking it seriously, you didn't commit any actual crime @Jenwilks82 .

how did your daughter's day go today OP?

I would have reversed my car into them. Yes, I know I do have a few screws loose.

Or "LTB". That's right, a decade of marriage to your child's other parent out the window (not to mention selling the family home) just because Karen on Mumsnet thinks he's "vile".

Whhhhoooaaaaa. First of all that seriously sucks that your daughter is being bullied. These girls sound horrendous.

But - never ever ever ever address these kids yourself. Ever. You are the adult here and need to act like it - however awful they are they are minors. You will only ever make it worse and now the focus is on your behaviour and not on the girls bullying. What if they lie and say they were intimidated and scared etc. They may go to the police and it’s their word against yours. Technically they can say they were being threatened and verbally assaulted by you (yeah it could be a lie but the police don’t know these girls or what they have done). Why would you invite that into your life? You are now dealing with another issue and frankly could have made it worse for your daughter. How are they going to react when they next see her?

You need to address this with the school (as per their policy) and ensure they are dealing with it there. Document everything and keep records. Speak to them regularly and often. Good luck.

I approached my child's bully in a calm
Non threatening manner and reminded him that now he was ten he could be arrested and prosecuted so to think very very carefully about throwing pieces of glass and stones at people. He never did it again .

When my son was assaulted by another bully at high school I just rang the Schools Community Police man and he sorted it out. I contacted the school after contacting the cop . They were not happy but tough . My son was never bothered again as it went like wildfire through the school that the police were involved. Try the schools Community cop route .

Can you fight fire with fire and get the police involved? If an adult was doing this to another adult then you'd get a restraining order and try to get them done for harassment. They are over the age of criminal responsibility. Your dd needs to start writing everything down with dates and times, try to get as much audio or video recording as possible.

You may well end up on a local FB group as “look at this horrible woman shouting abuse at my angel child” so just be prepared for that.
Are the school aware of the bullying?

I understand your actions, I remember one occasion pinning a scumbag to a wall and screaming I would tear his skin off if he ever threw a stone (rock) at my child's buggy again.

I remember the adrenaline and thinking back to my law days and remembering I had a legally precedent defence.

Unfortunately you don't have the defence and now a days the issue is it is likely on a social media platform. Are you in a job that this could cause issues?

I wouldn’t be worried about yourself, I’d be worried about your poor daughter. These don’t sound like girls who will have taken that well or will back off as a result - your daughter may well find the bullying she’s experiencing gets far worse as a result.

Children are vile, yes, and bullying is awful, but there are far better ways to respond. You likely won’t get into trouble…but I’m very surprised your response is to think about yourself and implications for you and not how it might affect your child

You’re human and you have pointed out to them what they’re doing wrong. You haven’t broken any laws .

@oakleaffy

I assumed dd was a child too!! Easy mistake.

Oh sorry, my mistake ''Grandchild''...and your Daughter got beaten up.

That's still dreadful.

Still feral a parent for attacking her.

I too went after a group of teen boys who sold my son something that was faulty and then mocked him for buying it.

I was fuming - I think kids can tell If you are genuinely furious- anyway, I got the money back!
I was called a 'Psychopathic bitch' by one of the cheeky teens- but I didn't care.

However, that was before smartphones were a ''thing'' that every kid had.

They didn’t attack the child, they attacked the child’s mother (not that this makes it ok, of course)