Does my daughter need a toilet pass?

I'd be very concerned about her not doing any work too. How will she be learning anything?

Which teaching staff are they going to make redundant to pay for approximately 18-20 (to allow for lunch and break covers) toilet attendants?

What a horrible thing to say. I don’t think you have any idea of the realities of anxiety.
I should imagine that queuing for the loo, probably pushed for time and having to ‘go’ overheard by an audience, is hell for most teenagers.
What if all workplaces implemented this? And staff were only allowed to go to the loo at certain times of the day. There would be an outcry; there already has been at some workplaces.
The issue is that schools need enough private and decent loo facilities.
Your poor daughter. Yes she needs a loo pass. Speak the MH lead at her school. There is a legal obligation to make reasonable adjustments if her anxiety is severe enough to be considered a disability.

Toilets in DDs secondary schools are horrendous. Bullying, vaping, vandalism and disgusting behaviour, such as smearing poo and period blood up the walls. The school was completely unable to control the feral behaviour, so the toilets are locked most of the school day. Only open during break times, so queues are long.

Consequently DD never goes to the toilet at school, which means she's stopped eating and drinking during the day. It seems to be a common problem in many schools. I've no idea why the behaviour in toilets is so out of control in so many schools.

OP - ask for a toilet pass. Your poor DD sounds like she's really struggling. Get her some period pants too so she's not wearing 2 pads during the days she has her period.

Well, go to the gp she has a medical reason! If she has anxiety that is affecting her daily living (which it is) then its a medical reason. Get help for her anxiety whilst you're there.

Exactly this! If schools need to Police the toilets then that’s what needs to happen. They can’t just stop all kids using them it’s awful.

@KerryBlues you clearly don't know anything about social anxiety!

@BeFunnyAmberPlayer I would contact the SEN provision at school, hopefully they will be understanding. My son also has social anxiety/selective mutism and would not cope in that type of situation either and would likely need a toilet pass. It may not be a physical medical condition but it is a condition preventing her being able to use the facilities at particular times.

Is your daughter under SEN provision for her social anxiety? I have found them extremely helpful for my son who is in a similar situation.

I can only imagine it being doubly traumatic for a girl with having to cope with montly periods on top of this too so I would definitely contact the school stating what you have mentioned here.

Often the kids who just want to be able to perform normal bodily functions are not the ones wrecking the place, but they still get punished.

Kids need to not smash up the toilets, smoke, take drugs or do anything else that they do when staff aren't able to supervise them, then.

Imagine needing medical evidence to use the toilet. Pathetic.

Locked toilets are crazy! DS Y7 came home bursting yesterday because he has two periods between lunch and home time then bus home so nearly three hours without a loo break… it was a hot day so he’d had plenty to drink… totally stupid situation kids need to be allowed to wee when they need to!!

Exactly this!
I couldn't believe it when my daughter said they were locked and only opened at break times. Then there is a massive queue so it still makes it difficult for her to use them. She has also stopped drinking at school

Social anxiety is reason for a pass. It's hard to balance. Free access to toilets leads to all manner of things (from sex to smoking to bullying).

We have a toilet rota and have to sit outside taking names during classes - 2 at a time allowed. It works

We would ask for medical evidence of need to issue a toilet pass, however we do issue them from time to time on a discretionary basis for issues such as anxiety & SEN and would do this via the pastoral teams.

I’d suggest dropping an email to your DDs pastoral manager explaining what’s going on and take it from there.

Cross post with @kenidorm

So this is part of a much bigger issue. Is she getting any support from anyone else in or out of school for her anxiety?
She may possibly be allowed a toilet pass, but missing part of lessons to go to the toilet isn’t exactly an ideal solution either - disruptive to her learning. I would ask for a meeting with the pastoral team and come up with a plan which doesn’t involve missing lesson time.

You've clearly not hung around secondary toilets at break time (I do a break duty there). It's not the same thing at all. Navigating the kids who pile in there to vape...

I'd push the stopping eating and drinking angle and the anxiety.

The problem obviously runs much deeper than toilets. I hope she is getting support for her needs. Speak to school about the toileting issue.

I would ask the school about getting one, she’s not eating and drinking, it’s causing her anxiety

Can you talk to her about what she’s nervous about?
If she has her period it will be better to quickly change a pad that risk leaking and being really uncomfortable. Not going for a wee for 6 hours could cause a UTI.
If she has to queue so be it, I mean it’s the same for women’s toilets everywhere!
However if she needs to go at another time due to whatever reason she should be able to go and shouldn’t need a ridiculous pass.

A child who is not eating or drinking all day to avoid using the toilet is clearly struggling a lot and needs reasonable adjustments.

If she has anxiety around using the toilets then school may accept this as a medical reason.

At my school as long as parents were prepared to phone up and ask for one they were given out.

If she can sit in a classroom she can use a loo.