Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Teacher muttered "fuck off" to yr7 pupil

156 replies

Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 18:39

So my son age 12 had a supply teacher today for one of his classes. Ds went to the loo and when he got back noticed his rucksack was open and someone had nicked his water bottle.

Realising it was his mate on the row behind, he was trying to get it back, supply teacher noticed him talking and was warned if he saw ds talking again he would get a detention

End of class ds approached teacher and asked if he had a detention (he's very worried about this as not had one yet) - teacher waved his hand and muttered "just fuck off "

What do I do if anything? Maybe his patience was tested but seems very bizarre.

OP posts:
imgoodthanks · 16/05/2024 23:01

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 16/05/2024 19:20

Assuming he hasn't been given a detention AND told to ff off I'd let it slide.

One of DD's class is a complete chatterbox and never shuts up. He was told he'd be the first person to be lined up and shot in a concentration camp in a history lesson for being bleddy irritating.

Said in a joking fashion but if I had to choose between unprofessional the latter would get me more worked up. Just inappropriate to use that as a joke.

Sorry that's hilarious

Noseybookworm · 16/05/2024 22:25

I can only assume that the supply teacher was having a hell of a day and lost control of his senses for a moment! Unprofessional but given the stressful nature of the job, perhaps understandable? I would just tell your son it was unprofessional of the teacher to speak to him like that but we all make mistakes so probably best to just put it behind him this time.

Mygliderdoesaloop · 16/05/2024 22:24

I mean...no you shouldn't swear at a pupil.

But also, I can't help but imagine the teacher is Greg Davies.

Creamcrackered10 · 16/05/2024 22:20

The teacher being online friends with a student is a massive issue. Definitely report that immediately. If it's an innocent relationship, i.e. they are family members, it will quickly be established but there are very, very few circumstances where that would be okay.
The swearing I'd let slide but if it happens again I'd report. The lack of contrition worries me. I think most of us have probably said something we've regretted and apologised for it (we're all human and year 7 can grind you down) but if it's repeated it's very different.

Lucycantdance · 16/05/2024 22:19

You don’t do anything. Teacher sounds great.

zeibesaffron · 16/05/2024 22:17

This made me smile! Its a win though- no detention!!

Octavia64 · 16/05/2024 22:00

All secondary schools expose year 7s to bad behaviour, even the good ones.

At primary although you do get violence and swearing etc it doesn't generally impact the kids quite as much. I'm not really sure why. In ks1 although hitting and pushing are quite common they're worked on through kind hands etc and there's often some level of TA support.

By mid primary most kids aren't violent and tend to be fairly compliant, or at least compliant in a way a bunch of teenagers are not. They'll talk and be chatty and annoying but rarely deliberately bait or hurt the teacher.

Big groups of teenage boys can be a big problem though and most teens go through a stage where they really don't give a shit what the adults around them want, they care about their peers. Any year 7 is going to be intimidated by big year 11 lads - hell, they're taller and larger than most adults.

All secondaries have kids who vape and nearly all of them will have kids on drugs. Yes even the good ones.

What the good schools do is keep the pack mentality in check and stop it spreading too much across the school. In the bad schools that pack mentality rules - the big group of year 9 boys playing "let's all sit on Freddie" won't stop if a teacher tells them too.

Sugargliderwombat · 16/05/2024 22:00

Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:53

I agree, I've explained to him it's not nice to be spoken to like that in jest or not - you expect this from your peers not a grown adult - but to also learn from it, ie don't leave your stuff within grabbing distance, and save sorting it out to end of class of need be.

He's told me tonight one of the other teachers is online friends with another yr7, that's weird too isn't it and I would think safeguarding concern? Or am I completely wide of the mark with all this? Thought having been to secondary myself could at least given some advice but seems I'm well out of it, it's not like I'm ancient either!

Show quote history

What do you mean online friends? That is a HUGE concern and should be reported.

Sugargliderwombat · 16/05/2024 21:59

I'm not sure what schools are like where you are but this would NOT be testing my patience enough to swear 😂. Its quite bizarre.

Original poster
Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:53

katebushh · 16/05/2024 21:45

You don't do anything except support your son.

You'll look like a dick and troublemaker of you start bleating about a nothing situation and will set a shitty example to your son.

I agree, I've explained to him it's not nice to be spoken to like that in jest or not - you expect this from your peers not a grown adult - but to also learn from it, ie don't leave your stuff within grabbing distance, and save sorting it out to end of class of need be.

He's told me tonight one of the other teachers is online friends with another yr7, that's weird too isn't it and I would think safeguarding concern? Or am I completely wide of the mark with all this? Thought having been to secondary myself could at least given some advice but seems I'm well out of it, it's not like I'm ancient either!

OP posts:
Original poster
Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:48

SeriaMau · 16/05/2024 21:43

Contact the school and see if you can get him sacked.

Why?

OP posts:
Original poster
Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:47

@anotherside yes thank you this is the tact I plan to take. As I've said earlier in the thread, he's very conscientious and sometimes this shows in the way he takes things to heart a lot of other kids wouldn't give a second thought. I have seen a change in him the last six months though, I hope it is just natural development and not as a result of the crap he's dealing with everyday at school. I don't expect it to be all unicorns and rainbows but some of the things I hear make me wonder what sort of place we've sent him to. This is an ok area, "good" school that makes all the right noises too, I dread to think how things are in schools that are openly saying they have issues 😔

OP posts:
earther · 16/05/2024 21:46

Im not a teacher but i did tell a bunch of kids y7 y8s to fuck right off the other day.

katebushh · 16/05/2024 21:45

You don't do anything except support your son.

You'll look like a dick and troublemaker of you start bleating about a nothing situation and will set a shitty example to your son.

menopausalmare · 16/05/2024 21:44

Usually we think it and not say it.

SeriaMau · 16/05/2024 21:43

Contact the school and see if you can get him sacked.

Original poster
Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:42

@L4815162342 that sounds fucking awful, no wonder teachers are leaving in droves

OP posts:
anotherside · 16/05/2024 21:36

What the teacher did was wrong but the lesson I’d be teaching my child in those circumstances is that A) it’s poor behaviour, but everyone makes mistakes/has off days. B) not every mistake needs a big song and dance

KreedKafer · 16/05/2024 21:31

CombatLingerie · 16/05/2024 18:45

Yes @Porpoising so did I. Sorry OP just imagining the teacher was Tony Mammoth 😂

This is exactly what I thought of too 🤣

Original poster
Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:29

@DoreenonTill8 what measures do the school take with violent pupils at your school? It must be so scary I do feel for all school staff going through this

OP posts:
StaunchMomma · 16/05/2024 21:28

Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 18:39

So my son age 12 had a supply teacher today for one of his classes. Ds went to the loo and when he got back noticed his rucksack was open and someone had nicked his water bottle.

Realising it was his mate on the row behind, he was trying to get it back, supply teacher noticed him talking and was warned if he saw ds talking again he would get a detention

End of class ds approached teacher and asked if he had a detention (he's very worried about this as not had one yet) - teacher waved his hand and muttered "just fuck off "

What do I do if anything? Maybe his patience was tested but seems very bizarre.

Teacher will deny it but definitely let the school know. I doubt very much this will be their first incident.

There is no world in which teachers don't know that is utterly unacceptable. These things are really well drummed into you during training.

Original poster
Cornishbelle · 16/05/2024 21:27

@ageratum1 you're right, needing a pee (avoiding break and lunch when full of vaping kids and people trying to kick cubicles in) then wanting his own belongings back, he's one step from Borstall lol

OP posts:
DoreenonTill8 · 16/05/2024 20:29

crumbpet · 16/05/2024 19:54

Nope you should quit and find a job where your life isn't in danger. Prison guards are probably better protected than you

Show quote history

Doubt the prison guard is told its their fault when abused and assaulted!

abracadabra1980 · 16/05/2024 20:26

Guardiansoulmates · 16/05/2024 18:42

Very unprofessional. He could be a brilliant teacher though, the unprofessional ones sometimes are.

Agree.

crumbpet · 16/05/2024 20:18

L4815162342 · 16/05/2024 20:16

I don't quit because besides all that, I love my job. The kids who don't behave like that make it all worth it. They're amazing and I want to help and support them. It's an incredibly deprived area and the kids need all the support they can get.

And if we all quit, who would be left?

Show quote history

That's fine but you know the deal. You know how much crap you have to deal with . So that's the job.

It doesn't matter if there's no one left it doesn't mean you have to do it

Swipe left for the next trending thread