Please or to access all these features

Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Help needed so I can help my year 10 son

52 replies

2023ideas · 06/04/2024 11:27

I need your advice please.

I have a year 10 son, who is doing averagely in most of his subjects. He’s not particularly academic, but his target grades are 5-6 in almost all subjects. His school seems to have many behaviour issues, so a lot of classes are disruptive, and he seems to have a lot of cover teachers. I feel I need to help him outside of school.

We are a family that values education (both me and dh have degrees and good jobs, and dh has continued studying - for various work exams - pretty much ds’s whole life. He knows our jobs - and therefore standard of living - is down to us working hard and getting good jobs). However, he doesn’t seem interested in achieving anything for himself. At February half-term, I sat down with him and we looked at the exam boards for all the exams he’s taking and noted what was required. We made a timetable and he promised to do 1 hour every night to solidify what he knows. I have bought the recommended text book for each subject. (His school doesn’t set much homework, if any, so I thought 1 hour a night is not unachievable).

However, we are now at Easter holidays and he has hardly done anything. Just argued with me. This holiday I signed him up to some online revision, which he has done without too much argument. It seems he needs structured lessons to learn, rather than being able to just go through books himself. Obviously to get online teachers is extremely expensive. The next level is pre-recorded online teaching. Then there are the free resources on You Tube, but I am worried they require too much effort for my ds to work through
as they aren’t as structured.

I am aware that I am running out of time and just need to find a solution. Please can someone help me work out the best way forward? Any recommendations very gratefully received!

OP posts:
HavfrueDenizKisi · 06/04/2024 11:35

There is no best way forward if your DS is not motivated or willing to put the effort in, unfortunately. I know this is not what you want to hear.

However an honest conversation about what he plans to do post GCSE may be the carrot he needs to achieve his grades. It's hard. 14/15 yrs old is an annoying age when they think they know everything and yet have no idea how their work now impacts their future. If he, for example, wants to do A levels at his school what is the grade criteria to achieve that? Ditto sixth form college? Or is he looking for an apprenticeship and qualifications that lead to a practical career? If so, he needs to work out, with your help, what he needs to do now to achieve his next step.

But in all honesty, you can sit him in front of a book but you cannot make him work.

Floralnomad · 06/04/2024 11:30

Stop pushing so hard as it will have the opposite effect to the one you desire . What does he want to do / be ultimately as you are more likely to inspire him that way . Nagging does not make children revise .

Swipe left for the next trending thread