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waiting list experiences / help!

171 replies

pearlsthatwerent · 04/03/2024 11:40

Just after a little advice - anecdotes - stories - cheerful reflections...

My daughter wasn't offered ANY of her preferred secondary schools (we weren't fussy - would happily have sent her to all of them - and we did include her catchment school). Instead she's been offered a place at a school across town (c. an hour's bus ride) with a less good reputation. We're in Cambridge, which seems to have had an absurd bulge year.

She is 10th on the waiting list for our 1st preference (240 PAN), and I'm just trying to understand how these waiting lists work. Does anyone have any insight?

In particular: are places offered as soon as they become available, or do schools / LAs wait until after certain dates - perhaps the deadline for acceptances?

If we decide to home-school or manage to find (and indeed afford) a place at an Independent, can we remain on the state waiting list?

Does 10th sound hopeful in this situation - bearing in mind the almost general over-subscription here? I'm torn between remaining optimistic and gently preparing my daughter for a change of plan, but I've no idea how much movement is usual on these lists, or when it happens (why would anyone change their mind in July??).

I'd be so grateful for any thoughts anyone wanted to share - we're thinking about an appeal too, but just hoping against hope that won't be necessary.

OP posts:
Gobbolinothewitchscat · 09/04/2024 09:44

Rinse123 · 08/04/2024 13:00

I had a lovely break with the kids for first week of Easter holidays, back to work today and now back to anxiety about the waiting lists 2nd allocation round 25 April. I’ve had no input from the schools or LA to know our position. Submitted Appeal in March but looks like these are not heard until June so I remain in limbo.

Urgh - that is hard going. I've just got everything crossed you will hear something soon! Still checking in and hoping all going as well as possible for everyone and soon you will be shooting up the waiting lists!

Rinse123 · 08/04/2024 13:00

I had a lovely break with the kids for first week of Easter holidays, back to work today and now back to anxiety about the waiting lists 2nd allocation round 25 April. I’ve had no input from the schools or LA to know our position. Submitted Appeal in March but looks like these are not heard until June so I remain in limbo.

DizzyDandilion · 02/04/2024 18:40

My eldest is now 18. His best friends went to Chesterton and I was seen as odd at putting NCA as first choice. However, the school has served him well and he took advantage of every opportunity he was given. He feels an incredible loyalty to the school as does my youngest.

Secondary23 · 02/04/2024 13:22

Hi, all I can say is hold in there as waiting lists do move. We didn't get any of our choices last year and it was the hardest thing my daughter went through. The only one in her class. In May, on the second round we were offered third choice and then first choice by the end of the second round. But it shows things move as we accepted and then turned down two schools to get to our end result. It was a long, unsettling and all consuming wait but it does happen! She has settled really well into her first choice. Now to do it again later this year for second but hoping easier with sibling link but not guaranteed. Sending lots of good luck your way!

MarchingFrogs · 02/04/2024 10:28

shockeditellyou · 02/04/2024 09:37

@DizzyDandilion I'm having a complete wobble about appealing now, as lots of other people are saying the same. No idea what is best to do now!

You can withdraw your appeal at any time - including on the day, and there are legitimate reasons for that, such as being informed at the last minute that an appeal heard earlier for a preferred school was upheld - but obviously for scheduling / panel workload purposes (panel members are volunteers and each set of papers has to be read through thoroughly in advance of the hearing), the Clerk woukd prefer to be informed sooner rather than later.

shockeditellyou · 02/04/2024 09:37

@DizzyDandilion I'm having a complete wobble about appealing now, as lots of other people are saying the same. No idea what is best to do now!

DizzyDandilion · 29/03/2024 19:38

Those Cambridge parents worried about NCA please let me reassure you. I have one child been through the school and starting an extremely well respected University in September and another who will be hopefully going to Hills soon. They were given so many opportunities at NCA and did/ are doing well.

pearlsthatwerent · 29/03/2024 14:43

@Secondarywoes @shockeditellyou Excited to hear all this waiting list movement! We've barely shifted, though - I know that several offers have been made after refusal to our 1st preference school (IVC), but clearly there are other children who have leapfrogged us in the priority list. We started off at 10, and are now 11; very depressing. For our 3rd choice school (Comberton) we've gone up from 45 to 24! Still not near enough, but evidence that something is happening somewhere.

(I rolled my skirt as a teenager; I remember it being rather uncomfortable. Old enough to have escaped the tan, though - I'd so have gone for that.)

OP posts:
shockeditellyou · 29/03/2024 13:00

@Secondarywoes yes, WL update is good but I’m still paranoid that most of the movement has happened, or that the 2nd round will all leapfrog us in the waiting list! We’ve appealed for one as it’s a really straightforward case, but not sure about the other school. We don’t really have that good a case for appeal there.

@Dparent our LA offers waiting list places as they become available, but have paused now whilst they do 2nd round, I think they start offering from WL again on 1st May.

Dparent · 29/03/2024 12:30

@shockeditellyou that’s a very positive position! Do you know if LA will send waiting list offers together with the second round or they will deal with the second round first? I found that different councils have different ways of handling the second round and waiting list which make me very confused! I keep waiting and waiting and hope for updates after Easter!

Secondarywoes · 29/03/2024 12:19

@shockeditellyou thanks for the update, that's good to know what to expect, and what good news to be top 5, fingers crossed for you! Are you appealing for one school only? I still haven't made a decision on appealing, I was hoping for a WL update to help me decide.

whiteboardking · 29/03/2024 10:56

@Gobbolinothewitchscat
On your point on the slightly diff pass rates - I would not get hung up on that. Roughly the same. The difference can be

  • some cohorts are just better
  • % SEN children
  • some schools heavily restrict options . Some offer free gsces and some tons.
  • some won't allow DC to take an option if they'll get a low grade.
On top of that it is your child that has to work at high school to get their grades. The school is only part of it. Revision hours & application is the difference much of the time. Only your DC can do that
whiteboardking · 29/03/2024 10:34

Those of you judging a schools academic attitude in relation to shirt skirts & false eye lashes - just don't go there. All it tells you is how strict the school is at at enforcing skirt lengths & make up etc. Every teen girl I know goes through skirt rolling. Plenty of high achieving girls like false eye lashes, nails and tans. Half our local grammar / private girls are almost orange. Some schools choose not to spend all day on this.
A friends school makes them all do a skirt inspection on the way in! (Church comp)

shockeditellyou · 29/03/2024 08:44

Yes, we had a response to our waiting list request - we’ve moved up a lot and are now top 5 but I suspect that’s all the movement we’ll see for a while. The LA said there will be no more movement after 1st April whilst they do 2nd round applications. We also submitted our appeal so hopefully we’ll get a date for that soon as well.

Secondarywoes · 28/03/2024 21:30

Any news from other Cambridge people this week? I haven't heard back after emailing admissions a week ago. I suppose they are working on late applications now.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 25/03/2024 10:50

shockeditellyou · 25/03/2024 10:39

I'm a bit more zen about it this week. I think it's because the initial panic has subsided and there are so many shades of grey - we could go to our offered school and it would be great, we could go to our preferred school and it would be crap. The visit really helped too.

That said, I'm waiting on a letter of support for the appeal and then it's going in this week!

I'm going to get my appeals finished this week too. My DH is very zen and also very good at compartmentalising. He humours me for a bit and then says no point talking about it as we're going over the same stuff. But I don't feel we are 😬.

Anyway, at least we might hear something tomorrow or Wednesday and then nothing for weeks due to Easter 🐣 but I'm going o really try and treat that as down time!

shockeditellyou · 25/03/2024 10:39

I'm a bit more zen about it this week. I think it's because the initial panic has subsided and there are so many shades of grey - we could go to our offered school and it would be great, we could go to our preferred school and it would be crap. The visit really helped too.

That said, I'm waiting on a letter of support for the appeal and then it's going in this week!

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 25/03/2024 09:49

Secondarywoes · 22/03/2024 21:12

I agree that Ofsted isn't everything. I visited 6 primaries and my top choice was a requires improvement one. If it's any consolation @shockeditellyou I went to an event at Chesterton and the skirts were very short there too!

I emailed for an update on WL positions and to ask if a place won through appeal has to be taken up. I suppose i could put in the appeal then withdraw if I decide to stick with current allocation.

Thanks to both you and @Rinse123 for your really helpful posts. This is a rollercoaster. Hoping for some clarity this week and that everyone on this thread might get some too. I keep telling myself it's a long wait til September and lots can change so we all just need to keep on keeping on.

I do need to try and calm down a bit about all but it is hard!

Secondarywoes · 22/03/2024 21:12

I agree that Ofsted isn't everything. I visited 6 primaries and my top choice was a requires improvement one. If it's any consolation @shockeditellyou I went to an event at Chesterton and the skirts were very short there too!

I emailed for an update on WL positions and to ask if a place won through appeal has to be taken up. I suppose i could put in the appeal then withdraw if I decide to stick with current allocation.

Rinse123 · 22/03/2024 19:33

@shockeditellyou I do understand your concerns and felt the same about the all girls comp we declined tbh but then my all girls grammar (that was our 1st choice) is also kind of like that. Academic achievement great and non-comparable but lots of eyelashes still I feel like many of them are no longer accepting of being a geek. I was full on geek and that was fine when I went to school not sure that would be the case now.

shockeditellyou · 22/03/2024 19:01

Do you know what, the school visit was fine! We have been to this school a few times, both for open evenings and separate visits. At all times the school have been extremely welcoming and mostly honest. An assistant principal spent at least 30 mins chatting things over with me.

They had a shocking OFSTED but I know that is not the be all and end all, and I do think their last ofsted was harsh. But the academy trust has pumped in loads of cash and they are fully staffed for September; most of the staff I have met there have been lovely and clearly committed to the children.

My main concern (and this will sound very snobby) is I just don’t think their academic standards are that great. I don’t see many kids there who I want my daughter to look like, IYSWIM? There’s a lot of short skirts and leggings that you can practically see their flaps through, and that’s not what I want for my kids. I want them to not be like that and not feel odd for not wanting spider eyelashes. I want them to be proud of their school.

Parents we know there say get your kid into the grammar stream and they’ll be fine. But if I’m honest I wanted to be able to say “my kid is at $better school” and for people go to “oh that’s nice!” - not to wince in sympathy.

Rinse123 · 22/03/2024 18:02

@pearlsthatwerent agree entirely we are so privileged to have an offer from a private school and be in a position to offer that to DD but I feel upset that it’s come to me needing this insurance policy as I see it and the cost it’ll have to us as a family as they’ll need to be cut backs

pearlsthatwerent · 22/03/2024 17:59

@Gobbolinothewitchscat and@Rinse123 - same boat here! We've just got an offer at a private school, which in one sense is a huge relief; but we have another DC and would have to do it for him too, in fairness. So life would change quite a bit (more borrowing, no holidays etc); I feel lucky we can even consider this option, but can't help the sense of dismay, when we wouldn't be facing any of this if things had been just a little bit different. Looks like we'll have to pay a term's fees to keep the place before there's a chance of finding out about the waiting list, too.

I also have a DH who's in the 'just don't think about it for a bit' camp: a tolerant, glazed sort of expression comes over his face when I try to talk through my latest bit of mad statistics dredging. Very annoying.

And @Gobbolinothewitchscat , remember that bright children do well even in bad schools - statistics (much though I love them) only tell half the story. I think if our place were a bit nearer I'd be seriously considering it - but at least an hour each way (I did the morning bus route!) is too much. Good idea to visit / engage with allocated school if you're appealing, I think.

Sending calming and positive thoughts to you both, and all others trapped in this particularly unpleasant headspace.

OP posts:
Rinse123 · 22/03/2024 17:31

@Gobbolinothewitchscat so we have declined the non selective comp we were offered and both 1st and 2nd are grammar. We have an offer from a semi selective private. I know that DD will do well and be happy with the private but it will stretch us. If she gets an offer on 1st choice either WL or appeal we will do it.

logical mind I think with the academic support of us DD will do well wherever she goes but we are a London borough my biggest worry is getting stabbed - our non selective comps have metal detectors. So I’ve decided it’s selective or private. If I was in an area where safety wasn’t my biggest worry I would think DD will be fine well support her can get tutors as you say. It’s an incredibly hard choice and ultimately we have 3 DD’s so what we do with one impacts all. There’s a lot to think about. I’m here for you.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 22/03/2024 17:07

Rinse123 · 22/03/2024 14:56

@shockeditellyou how was the school visit?

Yes - would be interested to hear re this. Hope it went well