School unable to identify sexual harassment perpetrator and are doing nothing

One part of the reason for punishing the group is because it makes the kids who didnt do the thing really think seriously about what they're prepared to get involved with and who they want to risk being associated with. If you can always hang about in a group and use that as protection "but it wasn't me sir, I was just there" then you start to think you're untouchable. The school are really putting their heads in the sand in they know who the group are but are doing nothing.

You need to chase this up with the Head until they punish these boys severely.

What is their bullying policy?

Have they seen Jodie Foster's The Accused? Are they genuinely not aware that the mindset of standing by and cheering on the perpetrators of sexual assault is just as harmful and sometimes leads to worse behaviour by the attacker?

I'd ask them to punish all the boys as a group; send them all to the library every lunch and break time with teachers watching they don't commit more assaults?

Why should your daughter lose her free time because she was the repeated victim of sexual assault?

This seems insane.

They're teaching their students that men can get away with sexual assault and women have to remove themselves because their mere presence in the room is the cause; how fucking awful!!

@ilovebreadsauce would your DS just stand by, would he try and stop, would he report and give a truthful and full description of the incident in his witness statement?

In our local school an incident took place. Not what happened to your daughter but more a bullying incident. Group of lads, no-one would say who actually committed the incident. The whole group were suspended for four days. When the parents complained they were told that their sons were implicit in the incident that being a bystander was equally as wrong as being the main perpetrator. The board of management upheld the principals decision. Your poor daughter. I would report to the police

You can go to prison for joint enterprise. Might be a valuable lesson for him.

I think I would go absolutely mental. I feel angry enough reading about this happening to someone else’s girl and the schools wet lettuce pathetic response.

My teens are at an all girls school - this is not an accident.

With an attitude like that I can understand how boys think it's ok to act like this. If my son stood by while his friends commit sexual assault and did nothing I'd have stern words with him. If he then lied to cover it up I'd go nuclear

@ilovebreadsauce the OP states "a large group of boys from her year were present and laughing and shouting". Not quite "happened to be standing with" is it? If my teenage DS was present when a girl was sexually assaulted and complict in the cover-up of that assault, I'd also be going nuclear, just a little closer to home than the school. This is outrageous behaviour on the part of the boys in this group.

I have a son.

I'd go nuclear at him for watching a mate commit sexual assault and not reporting it.

Trousers to school. Complain to governors, threaten to go to police.

When this happened to my daughter at the same age, they did know who it was. They knew before she even identified him by his school picture.

His parents were brought in and we were offered a police investigation.

This should absolutely be happening! That'll get the boys talking!

Wow. Poor response on the part of the school.

My DD had a similar experience. Her school handled it brilliantly. Despite the fact the CCTV didn't cover it and the boys backed each other up so it was their word against my DD, no one was left in any doubt that my DD was believed. No punishment could be meted out because of lack of proof, but safeguarding processes allowed for measures to be put in place that sent a clear warning shot across the culprit's bow and a strong message to his lying accomplices that they would be tarred by association if not very careful. School also put more staff on stairs for a while too so that my DD did not have to alter her behaviour.

If he's refused to say who the perpetrator was he'd absolutely deserve to be punished.

And your solution would be to shame the school at the expense of this girl OR would it be to give your son a crack around the head and tell him to spill on who DID actually do it and give him a right mouthful for not backing this poor girl up?

Then perhaps its a good learning opportunity about 'joint enterprise' and the value of individual responsibility rather than cowardice and supporting a sex pest...

I have yo say if I had a son was accused of a sexual assault which he had no part in and was perpetrated by one of a group he happened to be standing with , I would go nuclear.

Have they separated and had them all write their own witness statement.
I guess the boys are probably aware snitches get stitches and afraid to come forward. Maybe they could be promised anonymity?

The technically are complicit in what is a crime.

They should be punished accordingly rather than the school going we can't work out which one did it.

They know. And are ok with it and think its ok to stick up for the boy rather than the girl in question.

Suggesting that girls should wear trousers and hide in the libraries not to come across the boys and not "to provoke inappropriate behaviors" is ridiculous and outrageous. I have a completely different experience with schools addressing those sorts of issues or any B/G bullying issues. Upskirting and bullying of a girl by a group of boys on two (!) occasions should not go down easily. In the school my DCs attend the accused boys will actually go into hiding in the library to avoid any contact with a victim.

Joint enterprise. They should all face consequences if one won't own up. There should be consequences for being onlookers to a crime and doing nothing, in any case.

Yes to DD wearing trousers, escalating complaint to governors, police immediately etc. I assume you've already been dealing with the Head? The school leadership needs a radical shake up over the way they've handled this.

The only suggestion from school is that DD spends her lunchtimes and breaks in the library where a teacher is present and she'll have some separation from the group of boys. This isn't going to work and sends the wrong message completely. AIBU to keep DD at home until the school deal with this effectively?

Tell the school that is victim blaming and if anyone should have their breaks and lunches supervised in the library it should be the whole group of boys unless they name the culprit. Whilst there maybe they can be taught something about sexual assault, abuse, respecting people and how not to be a dick

A few years back, one of my dc was punished because he was part of a group that wouldn’t own up to something one boy had done (damage to property not sexual harassment thank goodness) and whilst I was angry, I supported the school’s decision. The perpetrator did finally own up due to peer pressure and had to pay for the damage but all had after school detentions until it was resolved. Mind you, lots of parents were up in arms about it ‘but it wasn’t my darling who did it’ totally blind to the fact they were all goading each each on and whilst only one was stupid enough to do it, they were all responsible for being in that position in the first place just like the by-standers in your DD’s case absolutely should be punished. They need an education in social responsibility- there were some great ads recently about speaking out against bullying and sexual harassment. It takes maturity and strength of character but there also needs to be an awareness that should (is?) be part of secondary school education.

Sorry ignore the above.i hadn't read the op properly!

I am a bit confused.If your daughter saw it was a group of boys from her year, se must know some of them tk identify the year group.

The school have an idea of who this group of boys is, they have all been interviewed and have corroborated each other's stories insofar as they all agree that someone lifted DD's skirt, but none of them can (will?) say who.

Now, when you say the school have an idea which group it is , a key point is do they KNOW which group of boys, or is it conjecture? Very important distinction in how they can proceed.
I think ghe school should appeal fir any other victims to come forward, as I feel its unlikely that its just one lass being targeted,and maybe they would be able to help with identification.

You poor DD, I hate everything about secondary! Ugh.

The issue is that the school can't prove it, and if you went to the police it would be the same outcome. If none of the boys want to own up, you're sadly a bit stuck.

I am not sure what the answer is tbh. I have seen some schools deal with this really effectively by using there safer schools police officer (ask who yours is and whether they have one) where all the kids have been brought in with their parents and eventually one has squealed. Even going as far as analysing their phones and factory resetting them with parental permission.

Other schools are a bit lapse.

So, my advice firstly is find out if you have a safer schools police officer for your school. Secondly, I would ask if the parents of the boys have been contacted and if not, why. I would also be sending her in (if she wants to) in trousers.
Failing that, I would put your concerns to the governors/academy as well, this usually gets some action.