Destroying Daughters life

One option, still with private. Over the summer term or holiday online tuition on Maths and English to be solid. Maybe there is a creative writing course nearby that can be another way to get more sociable with new kids. One to one can be done via online you get more tutors to choose.
You need to identify the weak topics and the ones she is strong in. Timetables 1 to 12 under minutes. English comprehension.
Check examninja.co.uk they have for the English curriculum year workbooks bundles, ask teachers which year is she working at and get a few from that year, the current year, and the next year. Also, look at 11+ thread and SATs, to get an idea. Ask the current school, for exemplary examples of work so you can see the difference is it grammar or spelling etc to focus.
Private schools kids do meet outside school but you need to find a few and make an effort especially during holidays time.
Sport camp?

You didn’t answer the questions last time about what she wants.
So that would help.

Stop with the nonsense about pharmacy / medicine / law - she’s in primary! Give her a chance to breathe and find her interests - and remember that there are anyway huge numbers of state educated adults in those professions.

The most basic question here is would she (not you) prefer to continue in English or Welsh, with support to catch up in Welsh?

Is the state secondary you mention Welsh medium or English? It sounds like she’s final term of Y5 now, although I’m not sure as your posts aren’t very clear.

Are you a Welsh speaking household? It sounds like it from your son initially struggling with an English language school, but then that doesn’t fit with your daughter being behind in Welsh if you speak Welsh at home. Do her old friends speak Welsh out of school?

So back to that question other posters asked you before - what does she want to do?

If it’s return to her Welsh primary, what can you do to help her Welsh? Speak it at home, tutors?

I wouldn't send her back just for the friendship. She is 10 and when they move to high school even if with the same friendship group friends often change dramatically. Both mine went to local high school with a lot of their friends, non of their friends at high school are from primary. So although she maybe upset about it now its probably a non issue in the long run.

Sounds like I would be way more concerned about her being so far behind. I was 3 years behind in English at 10 but was found to be seriously dyslexic. Have you been and talked to the school to see what they think the issues are? Don't keep changing her school she needs to settle somewhere and you need to find out what the real problem is.

Firstly I would have issues with any school never mind private who would tell your child they are so far behind.
Have they called you in? What's the action plan? Has she had any testing?
Assuming you are paying heavily for her schooling now, then your expectations should be higher.

Stop playing Hokey Cokey with their education. Pick a side and get on with it.

Get your daughter off to her current school and don't be so wet.

Socially, these things take time. Unfortunately for your daughter the gap will widen with the local kids so focus on one or two who are friendly.
Of course private school kids socialise outside of school. Have you arranged any outings, play dates, sleepovers?

Can you afford tutoring? She can have a tutoring with the A level pupil who had A and A* at GCSE and they would charge like £15 per hour. You can then arrange .lre than once per week tutoring.

I'd go back to welsh & tutor her.
Private is sounding misearable for her and a waste of money

@Itwasafterallallaboutme

She has 2 children. A son and a daughter

Absolutely this. They must know if they are coming or going most years. Supplement with tutors if you need to but pick one and commit to it. If you want her to be proficient in her Welsh then leave her in the Welsh school.

Sorry @sef23 if this seems like prying, I will understand if you don't want to answer my question, which is:

It sounds like your DD (I think, but I'm not sure that she is your daughter as you refer to "her" as being your DS, but also as her or she) might not have a biological father who you can discuss this problem with? If she hasn't got a DDad, has she got Granparents on either your side or her DDad's, who could give you intelligent advice, but who will understand if you don't appear to be following their advice?

I am asking about this because I think that her other closely related loved ones - if she has any - should be able to give you some of the best advice, as they both know and love their DGC very much, and will therefore only give you very well intended advice. Unfortunately, you cannot trust strangers to always give you the best advice, firstly because they don't know your DD and all her intrinsicalities, and secondly, because very sadly not all strangers give their "advice" for positive and genuine reasons.

I hope you find your version of Soloman to help you reach the best decision for your DD xx

I would concentrate on the friend who added her to the whatsapp group as she clearly like's her and have them do something nice together. You can't make a decision on education based on how the other girls in your village treat her they may still exclude her if she goes back.

If you live in Wales and understood the culture you will realise that people get a bit peeved by people who send their children to private school because community & culture are important. If your child is English 1st language but been taught in Welsh then goes to an English private school then she will appear behind. Stop messing with your kids education. Pick a side. If you are English speaking, stick your kid in the English stream so that she can catch up. Where on the border are you? I don’t know many horrendous state schools.

How many moves have they had? They really need stability and no more moving.

I wouldn’t judge the village children too harshly - they must feel somewhat rejected for a private school. That was always going to create tension. It does in our village too: there is a divide between private and state school children sadly.

Move her back.
Organise a party and tell the families you missed them, and prefer the Welsh school after all. The grass isn’t always greener.

Being behind by three yeas is too long - her confidence will be crushed. She is lonely, friendless and not enjoying it. Private schools are tricky to navigate at times, and your dd is really struggling.

Put the money into private tutoring so she does well in her Welsh school, and towards savings for other things such as a car, driving lessons etc.

I would mover her, things are likely to get worse once she starts having to take exams etc.

I’m not sure I’d send her back- the “friends” she had there don’t exactly sound very nice?? What a tricky situation. I think I’d be tempted to stick with private, aim for more play dates/facilitate meeting up with other children from there, and in the meantime do all you can to boost her education at home. (Doesn’t necessarily has to ‘look’ like schoolwork, e.g lots of educational games etc out there). Really feel for you OP

Eh? Oh purlease. Of course SN children can be behind. I was saying to op that assuming her dc is not sn, being 3 years behind is a big deal, and one would hope that any primary school teacher had mentioned it before. Eg if a non sn child got to yr 6, and parent suddenly found out they were only at a year 3 level, having never been told anything before, one would question why school hadn't highlighted this before.

@Oblomov23 Have you never come across sen dc in state schools. At 10, they really can be 3 years behind in reading. Absolutely. Especially with two languages involved. It can slow both down. That’s why dc are behind in Wales some people think. When you look at English dc who cannot manage a MFL, why do we think Welsh dc are good at languages? It’s obvious some won’t be.

Reading this my immediate reaction was move house. Get away from the problem. When you leave a village school you cannot keep a foot in the camp. You have moved on. It’s very difficult to know what to do but I think I’d stay put. Keep going English but if you can move away, I would. Surely the school is in a town. Move there?

I'm struggling to grasp this 3 years behind, v 2 years behind. Really? I bet that's not the case. Unless your child has SN, or the primary teacher in any Year said she was so far behind, then she clearly can't be that far behind, not so much that a period of intensive support and extra from you, and a year of tutoring, won't sort.

@Elphame Gosh I had no idea! Is there a specific reason?

I took what OP said to mean the private school was operating 2 years ahead @SleepingStandingUp.

I don't know OP. I'd be tempted to send her back to the Welsh school and get tutors to supplement her education and build her confidence. However you said the local comprehensive is terrible so I'd worry about that. Will all her old classmates be going there?

Op you said Welsh school operate two years ahead, but in private school she's 3 years behind. That doesn't add up

The standard of education in the Welsh state system is generally poor. Welsh school children lag behind English, Scottish and N Irish children on all key indicators and the gap is widening.

We sent both our DC privately.

3 years behind, focus on this and ask current school for guidance. It could be another private English school etc. This is a huge gap and is it because it was topics not covered in previous school or they ok at that level. National GCSE curriculum so you need to cover this.
Ask which subjects, 3 years behind, Maths or English or both?