Why do parents opt for Homeschooling?

What to teach: At school, it's critical in what order and at what age children learn things. If they are out of step with what's expected, they can be left behind. That isn't an issue with individual learning, and therefore you don't have to worry so much. Parents can follow a curriculum if they want, or they can introduce ideas whenever opportunities arise or whenever children take an interest. If the child (or parent) later realises they didn't learn something important which they now need, they simply learn it at that point.

For example, my eldest learned basic maths through daily life. By their teens, they were functionally numerate, but not ready for advanced study. When they wanted to sit maths GCSE, they simply got hold of a textbook, discovered which aspects they hadn't yet covered, and learned the material there and then. That took just nine months. Schools require years and years to cover the maths curriculum because mass instruction is so inefficient compared with targeted learning, and because in many cases the curriculum requires them to push abstraction too young, before the child has acquired enough experience to grasp it easily, so it's a hard slog with much wasted effort.

By the same token, it's apparent to me that my younger child needs more relationship education, as she is vulnerable and easily manipulated. So that has become a focus for her. I look out for materials which will engage her, ask other parents for recommendations, and have discussions with her. I would have preferred her to learn this when she was younger, but she wasn't ready. Fortunately, there is no deadline. She can learn it now.

How to teach: Most home educating parents don't use the school model of formal instruction. Instead, we help our children find resources which are right for them. For instance, when one of my kids wanted to learn German, we both looked around for methods which suited them. They've done Duolingo off and on, watched TV documentaries in German, listened to Harry Potter audiobooks in German, attended lessons, and did a stint as an au pair. They love singing, and have German pop songs on a playlist.

I know that sounds rather haphazard. It IS rather haphazard. Learning often is. That doesn't mean it's less effective than systematic instruction. I'm quite shocked at how little German my younger teen's best friend actually understands after being taught it for 2.5 years at school! Whatever they're doing in her classes, it clearly isn't right for her.

Engaging dozens of kids in learning the same thing at the same time, whether or not they are ready or interested, is a tall order. Ascertaining what each of them has actually taken on board is also difficult when you don't know them well, you don't have time for one-to-one conversations, and you can't observe them going about their lives in a range of situations. Classroom teachers do require many skills which I lack. But the environment in which my few children are learning is not like a school, and so my job is easier than you're imagining.

Pretty much this. I'm trying to think of every option for DS other than going to the local school!

Does it matter? I didn’t read into the OPs question any judgement more just wanting to understand for those that do choose (some, whether a majority or minority, I’d suspect it’s a minority vs those forced to for various reasons but that’s another thread), why they choose.

I thought it was quite an interesting thread though a but hijacked in a moral argument about whether one should homeschool or not which i suspect the opposing sides will never ever agree on

Have you checked what percentage choose homeschooling?
Just curious.

I home educate both my children and both myself and my husband work full time. It can be done, it just needs more organisation to do so. Granted, this may not work for everyone but please don’t assume that home education means one parent/carer not working. I also know single working parents who home educate. There are, of course, families where one parent/carer will give up work to home educate but I see a real mix of circumstances.

Same story for me. The elective part of elective home education is misleading. I felt I had no choice when my autistic daughter at the age of 12 was burnt out and suicidal due to an inflexible and poorly resourced 'outstanding ' state school that she could not cope with. I had no choice and no support.

@RamblingEclectic
I spend far more sending my kids to schools than I did home educating them. It is much easier to home educate 'for free' than it is to do school for free. Just the amount I spend on uniforms and PE kit alone each year would be more than enough for home education and their clothes, never mind other supplies, transport, contribution requests, donation events... then there is the college that required gear be bought before starting that wasn't even used in the first year of the course

What about the cost of not earning a salary? Not saving towards a pension?
For millions of parents, there just isn't the option.

And if, on the journey to ‘becoming her own person’ whatever that means, your baby decides she / he wants to go to school?

Because the education might be free but its not always decent. Not all children can cope with the pressure of exams or being popular

Many do it because their local schools are crap. Free does not equate to good.

I've home educated, school educated and mixed educated, for a couple years all three at once. All forms have their pros and cons that vary with the context and choices available. I've also done support work with local home educators, currently a school governor, and some work with the local council around home education, mostly support from kids transferring in or out of home education and for older home educated kids accessing exams (they were running a programme just before COVID that has sadly since closed).

Many of those I know home educated at least in part because of an issue with the school, usually the child's issue with the school or school environment, though a few it's one of the parents who had an issue with the schools in the area when they attended. I think within the UK, at least the last data I saw on it, most home educators are through withdraw rather than philosophically from the start.

In my area, most children withdrawn to electively home educate return to a different school within a couple of years, especially at the key stage changes or through tribunals for specialist places, which can take years and often involve parents home educating for at least part of it. School quality and how schools meet the needs of children plays a major role.

I have seen parental anxiety play a role too, and it is mostly mothers, though I've seen a few fathers - had one who worried us having his email meant he would get hacked. Mostly this is in combination with other reasons like school issues, poor choices in the area, or another issue that the anxiety is kinda feeding off of.

Other reasons I've seen include just being able to do so and not seeing a reason not to, parents' poor opinion on the National Curriculum, preferences for another type of education, a family member's ill health and wanting the child to be able to spend more time with them while they can, parents being afraid of fines for a child who was avoiding school, parents who were encouraged to do so by the school the child had attended, being anti-exams,

I home educated largely because I felt able to do so, at least for primary, and could. The nail that pushed me to do so was for safeguarding reasons - my oldest child has communication struggles and was low verbal when he was young. When he was 3 in morning childcare, it turned out he and another low-verbal boy were being purposefully ignored and left out, and I decided I wouldn't put my kids back into that kind of setting until they could communicate clearly to me when there was an issue. Maybe parental anxiety played a role in this and over time this idea morphed into their father and I chose home education for primary, and my children make the choice once they reach secondary age. It's worked well for us. One of my kids is now an inclusion teaching assistant apprentice, basically her dream to work with kids across all ages across this trust, and we regularly discuss how she was glad she hadn't had to deal with what she sees primary kids having to deal with.

I spend far more sending my kids to schools than I did home educating them. It is much easier to home educate 'for free' than it is to do school for free. Just the amount I spend on uniforms and PE kit alone each year would be more than enough for home education and their clothes, never mind other supplies, transport, contribution requests, donation events... then there is the college that required gear be bought before starting that wasn't even used in the first year of the course.

School has been cheaper is when it comes to exams, by a long shot, I'm in an area where exam access is very difficult outside of school and costs for private candidates are high when you can get a place. It's also cheaper for certain extracurricular activities, and - in college - certain equipment that it would be very difficult and costly to access otherwise.

Decent is location specific - where I am was an education black hole for decades, though it has improved recently, it still has many issues.

Also, while probably the most common route, not all home educators involve a parent not working. Some work different shifts to take turns as educator, some work from home with older children using online schools, some use childcare while working with long shifts a few days a week to be able to have more days to be able to be at home, and since COVID there has been a significant rise in home education tutor groups in the UK that some parents use while working, though again, that's mostly with older children.

So many issues with schools. As a governor I see

School buildings not fit for purpose
Staff shortages
High needs children forced into mainstream
No differentiation due to lack of staff and resources
Disengaged and unmotivated teachers
Curriculum outdated, focused on testing

Serious behavior problems are left for schools to manage, largely due to other services collapsing (child mental health, social services etc).

There is no joy in learning, not enough focus on becoming a well rounded person. Much of the school day is childcare and behavior management.

There is a huge and growing home school community in my area. Sadly it’s not always a choice for those with SEN as provision is minimal.

Try to be open-minded about it, though.

DH was quite keen on the idea of home educating, and I would have been open to it if it seemed the best thing. However by the time DD was 4, it was quite clear that school was the best option for her. (On one occasion in the first term, when she arrived at school she asked her teacher a question - her teacher answered and then turned to me to explain. I said it was fine - I knew the answer, but DD wasn't happy to take my word for it!) Later, DD struggled with lockdown learning (and there was as much help from us as she wanted) - she was much better learning at school in a group.

Things like learning to express yourself and figuring out your own interests are arguably easier if you are mixing with a larger number of people and being exposed to lots of different things. DD inevitably shares interests with us as she's been exposed to them so much - school has given her interests in other things as well. School is actually a relatively small proportion of a child's time, so there is plenty of time for learning with you too.

I think DH's interest in home education was partly due to poor experiences at school which have not been replicated for DD - schools change, and vary from place to place.

It may turn out that home ed is what works for you and your child, but it might not.

I listed a wide range of reasons for HE
I even repeated it for you.

You incorrectly assumed I am home educating - why?

Your son sounds like me :-)

He’ll be well set up for uni where self motivation is a huge challenge for a lot of first years.

People are always surprised when I say I mostly home educated myself. I guess there’s a perception home ed people are weirdos.

I always had lots of friends i’d just see them outside of school. In school I’d just have been annoying them chatting all day in lessons as i couldn’t focus in the classroom.

I get all the comments on here about people who don’t have a choice to homeschool (my kid is autistic, i totally get it), but think the question is about people who do choose to and why?

For my part it’s not a think we’ve ever seriously considered as lockdown showed i’m a rubbish teacher BUT I do really like the concept. If my kids weren’t lumbered with rubbish-teacher me as a mum I bet they’d like it.

So much of the school day is basically crowd-control, getting kids to behave, move from one place to another etc. If you homeschool you can cover a lot of academic ground quite quickly freeing up time for fun enriching activities like museums, sport etc. Parents can tailor a curriculum specifically to a child’s interests, spend longer on things which are interesting, take exams at a pace that works for them. It sounds a dream.

I am also autistic and hated school. Through my later secondary and sixth form education i mostly home educated myself (went in maybe once or twice a week) and got straight As and A*s. I would have got worse marks if I attended more as I couldn’t focus in a classroom so time in school was for me dead / wasted time

Lightswerve - why do you assume that you are better informed than me? Why do you think your experiences = knowledge but mine = anecdata? Why do you find it so troubling to acknowledge that some people he for different reasons than those that you’ve mentioned? What exactly about my post is it that you think is ‘ill informed’? You can’t just brand people as biased, ill informed and blinkered because they raise different points! It seems to me that you are ‘blinkered’ in being unable to acknowledge that there is a wide range of reasons for he!

@Meadowgrasses

Your posts are just anecdata gathered from a biased viewpoint.

Why have you assumed I'm a member of the home ed community? That's your bias talking too. My children are in school.

Your latest post is again ill-informed. Perhaps reading some factual information about home education would help you remove your blinkers?

Lightswerve- I did read your post, I’m not sure you’ve read mine.
I said: Many have been failed by other schools - as shown in this thread. [your point 1]
but there are others who are home educated for reasons that are more to do with their mothers’ (and it is always mothers) reluctance to ‘let them go’ or because they want to shelter them from the real world, [your points 2 and 3] I’ve met several children like this and it is very sad to see.
I agree that I should have said nearly always mothers rather than always mothers.
I still don’t understand why you have a problem with me pointing out that some (not most) people choose to he for dubious reasons. The OP asked why people he and I’ve shared my experiences - they are real and as valid as yours. I’ve also been involved in a safeguarding case where parents of a primary aged child who was clearly being neglected (unwashed, hungry, persistent lateness, never did home reading etc)wanted to withdraw them from school, it was horrifying to think of this vulnerable child losing the security and care of school. I don’t know the outcome but still think about them. Just because I have witnessed this reason doesn’t mean that I think that this is a common reason - it’s rare enough that I didn’t mention it.
I do think it is very naive to assume that 100% of people in a community that you happen to belong to are always acting in the best interests of their children (consciously or otherwise). I understand that you want to defend your choices, but please understand that discussing other concerning reasons for he is not a criticism of you. It is an absolute cornerstone of safeguarding that we are able to consider everything as a possibility and discuss potential risks.

You didn't read my post upthread where I listed some reasons for home educating? Repeating for you here:

1. A situation where MS school doesn't/won't meet the needs of the child;
2. A philosophical preference for home education as opposed to institution-based education;
3. A desire to provide a tailored/alternative curriculum;
4. A need to provide stable education when there will be other disruption in the future - e.g relocations.

I know one family who just enjoyed lockdown and home learning and decided not to send their kids back to school. That's fine so long as their kids are receiving a decent education (which is rarely accurately judged by random observers who don't know anything about the specific education the family is providing or how home ed works in general).

@Meadowgrasses I think a lot of families might choose this if wealthy enough to not need two parents working. I possibly would if I didn't need to work and could face trying it. But them my DC like school. So maybe not ..

Lightswerve - there are some (not the majority) people who choose to home educate because they have an alternative or religious lifestyle and don’t want their dcs in school. Just because the people you know homeeducate because they have been failed by the system or because of SEN doesn’t mean that’s why everyone does. I know one family who just enjoyed lockdown and home learning and decided not to send their kids back to school.

We homeschooled for one term. Lots of reasons, bullying at school, daughter not learning anything new, it was a natural transition point anyway at end of primary. She had a confirmed place at an amazing secondary school. DH was a SAHD. I bought extra leave from work, we did experiments near a volcano, visited walled towns, maxed out the National Trust passes, Daughter read what she wanted, did the family accountss, planted things in the garden, we were visited twice by LA to check up on us and given leaflets but none fitted our profile and I don’t think they had a clue why we were doing it. For the social side she still had clubs and sports and neighbours to socialise with but it was isolating at times even for that short period.

in hindsight I think the experience helped her cope better than most during lockdown as she had developed an ability to self-study and manage without friends around so often.

My DH home eds our 3 boys (and has since the eldest was 3 and DS2 was 1) and works PT and I work full-time as a higher earner. We have always home Ed.

No SEN we just don't like the UK education system that is in place.

This is my experience. I know quite a lot of HEd families and all but one are because of SEN needs not being met in decent state schools. They just aren't resourced for it. Not enough specialist places. DC left without school places. Truely shocking.
The other family refused to entertain any of a number of decent state high schools over a fear of potential bullying (non of the schools have a bad reputation for that). No one really understands that choice as the DC seem to miss school.