My DS failed every one of his mock GCSEs

Op

I think you might find him slightly relieved to have you take control of this for him.
Totally agree that you need to focus on maths and English. Loads of good resources on line and absolutely he needs to put some effort in as well. Remind him that this is totally doable with a bit of effort on his part ) which it is)
A tutor ( even once a week) would be great if you could stretch to it

I agree with pp you need to work out exactly what went wrong.
it could be not concentrating in exam. But equally could be enforced errors. Not finishing. So really need to see the papers.
for eg my dd in process of asd/adhd diagnosisp
takes ages to do anything which particularly impacts maths
Makes silly errors and can do better on harder work
doesnt follow instructions - took out calculator but didn t use for chemistry
spent agrs trying to spell one word.

will avoid doing work and homework so if i leave her alone she might not do any

personallly i have awful memory so have to write things out to learn them.

is he sure none of his friends are ND? As my dc and others seem to attract or ND kids as friends.

past papers rwally do help.

@TeenDivided's advice is good. Do that.

I suggest you also contact the Head of 6th form and ask if (s)he can put you in touch with a couple of year 12s who are neurodiverse so that they can support your son. It can be v useful to meet students who've been through GCSE and come out the other side.

If there's anyone whose judgement your son seems to trust - teacher, sports coach, grandparent? Get them on it too.

I've got a y11 in my GCSE class who's also late diagnosed and feels he needs to be cool and it is very difficult to help!

Also I wish people wouldn't refer to 2s and 3s as "fails". If you are managing a number grade, you can generally manage a higher number grade with more revision and timed practice.

I’m not sure you know what a pastoral hub is for - it’s definitely not for babysitting students who don’t go to certain lessons and being provided 1-2-1 tutoring.

The student has ASD and ADHD, probably not on the severe end of the scale as it would have been picked up much earlier. They, along with probably 1/3rd of all school students have this and are not diagnosed.

Op is quite correct. He’s not revised or put any effort. They wont get any recognition for ASD and ADHD in the real world and really needs to get on with their work.

Op, if you can afford a tutor, focus on Maths as this is the one most difficult to pass post school. For Science, use FreeScienceLessons and/or Cognito videos on YouTube, in conjunction with revision guides.

I don’t think the way you worded things is great. Sounds like you’re ashamed of him as it makes you look bad in front of other people.

I had parents like this and they voiced things like that to me and it was some of the reasons why our relationship is destroyed.

I have adhd and was terrible at school, barely barely passed. My struggle with school persisted through to college - uni but then it all clicked when I did my masters. Don’t think my teachers or parents thought I’d ever get to that academic level. So basically as long as he doesn’t give up, he’ll be fine. Consider dropping what isn’t necessary.

Gcses are just a gate to get you through the next round after that they’re seldom asked for.

Just quoting this for the posters that missed it.

There is some good advice on this thread. All is not lost - you just need a plan and your son needs to understand that you are trying to help.

I work with many children who've been failed by our school system and schools will say anything to not put their hands in their pockets and should be geared to dealing with issues much earlier in a child's schooling. We don't need testing, we do need realistic assessments and it is often Years 10 and 11 that flag up needs which could have been addressed much earlier! Unfortunately our 'one size' schooling does not fit all, whether a child with additional needs or even those who are gifted and talented. He has not failed, he has been failed! If you can get a tutor and focus on the English and Maths, then a pass grade will help with his choices at college and beyond and a goal, something to aim for college / occupation wise, even if he changes his mind, can be a great motivator. Ask the school what they are now going to do to help him and don't be fobbed off by their excuses. Push for that EHCP, as it makes a real difference with help at college and extends the time he has for his college courses too.

As others have said don't panic.
If you could find an experienced tutor for Maths and English that would be very helpful.
And drop some subjects too.

Please don't say you are ashamed of your child because he has done badly in his mocks, and try not to think it. Presumably he took the exams? I know some ND young people who have refused to go into the exam.
Try and support him and be proud of what he has actually achieved.
The trail exams are there to help students prepare for the actual exam he will know what to expect and he and his teachers will look at how he can improve. But honestly even if he dowa not do well in his actual GCSEs it's not the end of the world. There are always retakes.

You’re ashamed? Of your disabled son? I think you should speak to some professionals and try to get a better understanding of him.

Don’t be ashamed, be on his side.

@Choirsinger7
You may be able to get MN to change the title of your post so you don't get more posters piling on who, like me, have not understood what you meant by being ashamed- which I agree takes away from the advice you were asking for .

Apologies . If you see my later post above that of @InefficientProcess you will see that I have acknowledged your later post which I hadn't seen before I posted originally .

My son has just done his mocks. He's been in a terrible state all the way through. He's diagnosed with ASD. Grades aren't everything. People fail GCSE's and still end up with good jobs. Uni isn't everything. Not everyone is academic.
As long as my son tried is best that's all i will ever ask of him. His Mental health will always come first.

Yes,I agree something to aim for and pretty easy for an academic child.
My niece is doing maths and politics for A level,she loves to learn and I'm sure doesn't find easy but embraces learning.
My son just finds it hard. To be honest although I nag him to revise, I don't see much of that all. Far too interested in the gym and work outs.
I just can't understand a 'U'. He can do basic maths. It's not like he was I'll,he is never off school. He baffled too.

I find it's also really unhelpful that they've got to decide or contemplate their next step for summer along with their mocks and exams, it can get too much at once.
Very stressful for them.

Be calm. Contact HoY and Senco by email, ask for an urgent meeting. What other adjustments could easily be put into place that they should already be doing?

What eye do you indent? That might help?

extra time in papers or other support? you'll have to push hard to get the extra time and papers actioned quickly enough, but if you push hard now and do everything in writing and follow up with a phone call you've at least got a stab at it.

@Barleymilk but something to aim for, surely???

Please don't be ashamed of your child (I honestly think that's awful!) Perhaps he struggles academically and just needs to find the right thing for him. Don't worry him, support him, tell him there are other things he can do. Perhaps something more active/less academic would suit him - is he good at sports and could do something physical? could he think of plumbing or bricklaying? is he interested in chefing? Think of things he likes and can do not how the system has failed him.

By the way one of my DC went to uni, it all went wrong and he came out with nothing apart form 40k of debt... but he's sociable, happy, such a "nice guy", he's thoughtful and now has a job he really enjoys. I'm super proud of him. Please, never be ashamed of your child!

7+ zone is out of reach for many.

Mock! Although that might be a Freudian slip! Lol

Please do not be ashamed. Whatever his exam results, he is your precious son and will have qualities to be treasured. At this point academic skills have eluded him. This might easily be because the school did not understand the challenges he faces.

There will be college courses that might suit him better than school; and hopefully you will have more understanding of what his special needs are; and be able to convey this to college. In my experience, colleges are often better than schools at accommodating special needs because they do not have an exclusively academic focus, and are more open-minded.

You must put out of your mind any comparisons with others. He is who he is and needs to learn to be proud of this. He needs you tell him how much you love him and that exams are not everything; that whatever his results you will still be proud of him.

Your friends with high achieving children will take their lead from you. If you seem ashamed and apologetic they will regard your son as a failure; if you speak of him with pride and understanding they will see that he is fine - just not exactly like their children. This matters not at all.

What he needs now is a ton of love. He has hidden his results because he thinks you will be ashamed - this is your chance to prove him wrong.

These are micks, that's what they're there for! Clearly an indication that he needs to put in some more effort to elevate his grades.
This might be the kick.up the backside he needs to shock him into sorting it out.
He has time yet before the real exams so hopefully he'll realise what he needs to do to raise his grades into the 7+ zone

My son came back with his results yesterday.
Had a 'U' in maths. Son was so upset but I tried to keep calm. I need to chat to his teacher as u less he scrunched up the paper he has been getting 3's up to now.
I spent the eve feeling so low,it's how to reply to people asking how he did and asking his next steps when college,at even a level 1 needs a 2 in maths.
Luckily he got 4 and 5s in three others but he wants to do plumbing and a level 3 insists on a 4 for GCSE.