Tell me about your child thriving at (comprehensive) school

That should say ‘wobble in y7’ - when he started secondary school.

Our son is is y9 at a local comprehensive. It’s OFSTED outstanding but that’s a rating from a long time ago so they must be due an inspection. Hard to say if he’s ‘thriving’ but he’s doing well so far - currently in top sets for maths and English. He had a wobble in y9 but seems to have found his motivation. The school is large (2000 plus including 6th form) and offers an extensive range of choice at gcse - he is taking Latin (he wanted to).

I expect h’ed do better if he was at a private school with smaller class sizes. I hope in the end the skills he learns of independence and the wider diversity of pupils he’s mixing with (and I don’t mean ethnicity - round here the private schools usually have more Asian pupils than white) will benefit him in the long run.

My dds have been happy and done well at their comp. Eldest is at a top 10 uni and younger got good grades at gcse. That's at their comp though. I can't say yours will have the same experience as not the same school.

In my experience, kids find their tribe. And learn a lot from being in the same place as lots of other tribes.

The thing about friendship groups with similar ambitions really struck home. I had that at school and it's what made me up my game and aim far higher than I ever would have if I hadn't been surrounded by similarly swotty culture-loving friends.

That was our experience too @Flockameanie. DD2's friendship group of 8 at her Secondary Modern all wanted to go to university, and did. 4 of them have gone on to get post-graduate qualifications. They all encouraged and supported each other and 6 years after leaving are still a close-knit group. Prior to their cohort the school had not had any demand from pupils wanting to study hard science subjects for A level, and they had to completely re-structure how they approached GCSEs in order to accommodate this. Which they did, thanks to a really strong SLT.

A lot of people say bright, enthusiastic kids will do well even in a mediocre school. But what if your kid is average, or has SEN or is just shy?

Both ours went to a good but not bang to rights outstanding comp. They both did well. Never had private tutors. Quite a middle class area and DCs felt the school could be a bit complacent. Very good on the extra-curriculars, especially music. I never felt that what the available private secondary schools could offer additionally was actually worth the cost. Ultimately it's about whether the school in question will do well for your child rather than across the board - and what you want the school to provide by way of "education", particularly if, as a parent, you're going to be supporting in terms of extra cultural, music, sporting activities or whatever, rather than looking for the school to - in many cases - babysit in those areas.

And definitely go for triple science, DD is also doing further / additional maths. Both are extra to the normal timetable so she stays late twice a week. I can’t believed they don’t set at all, that would annoy me, mine love the less disruptive and more difficult lessons.

My kids are doing well in the local comp. DD 16 on track for 7-9 in 12 (!) GCSEs , always being offered opportunities for drama productions, maths Olympiads, field trips, Spanish exchange etc. lovely friends, many extremely academic also, even those that aren’t are encouraged to find their ‘thing’.

I really hope it’s as good for DS12 whose settled in well but year 8 is a very ‘nothing’ year tbh

Apologies for the unbelievably MN reply but...ds was at his local comp. He's studying at Cambridge now so I guess you could say it was an ok choice.

More seriously, he went from the local primary with all his friends to the local comp with all his friends. His peer group were particularly great and an intelligent bunch. That made all the difference. Sport and music were uninspiring at the school, we filled the gap with local clubs and lessons. (Drama was pretty good in fact but ds hates performing). Pastoral care for him when dh died ws absolutely brilliant.

He was also exactly the kind of child that school liked - a bright, competitive mathsy boy. I've heard much less positive stuff from parents of children with different strengths.

I'd say, do you like the head, and does the school fit your child? I'd go for it, if both those answers are yes.

Yes, I've had 2 kids at different state schools. Both have had really good experiences. One is now at a high ranking uni doing a subject she loves and the other has just got straight 9s in her GCSEs. One school fell under 'needs improving' and the other 'good'. Both had above average progress 8. The school that needed improving was absolutely fantastic (this is the one where my daughter got straight 9s). There was so much pastoral care, the teachers were 120% dedicated and they did so many more revision sessions coming up to GCSEs than our local academic private school. If I had another kid I would definitely send them there even if I had the money to send them private. My daughter thrived there, made great friends, came out with a love for drama and music.

Having said that the state system is a mess through lack of funding. One of my kids had 34 in her French class and they had to do it in the science lab on those back-aching stools for a year because there was no other space in the school. There was a mass exodus of teachers in one school at the end of this academic year and I'm not sure they've managed to recruit enough teachers to to fill those spaces yet. There's also a plethora of supply teachers over the last few years. 1 print stick between 3 kids etc. Not much in the way of extra curriculum.

Please make sure you have enough money for some hefty hikes in private school fees if you go down that route. It's not going to get any cheaper.

My kids are thriving in their comprehensive schools. Of my friends with older children, they've gone on to very competitive university courses (Oxbridge, LSE, Russell Group including medicine) and one is currently on an accountancy degree apprenticeship as well as less prestigious or academic courses that suited those children. They've played sport at county and national level, played in national youth orchestras and acted with national youth theatre. I don't think their schools have held them back.

Mine went to the local comp and have done well academically.

Positives - having local friends. Easy to get to. Saving money.

The school was good for things like mock court, d of e, MUN, not so good for sports where, at times, it felt like the PE dept was too stretched to organise things properly and keep up the enthusiasm for sporty extracurricular stuff.

I do wonder whether the right private school can instill confidence, or whether that's a myth...

Some have suggested private 11 to 16, then move to state 6th form- may be difficult if your DC gets to 16 and is reluctant to move. And then you've got 2 more years of school fees .

Our DC's is an academy (small chain of 3 local secondary schools) and it's excellent. He is absolutely thriving. We would have gone private had it not worked out, but he's really flying.

I wasn’t impressed at all with our local comp and didn’t have money for private, however was able to pay the bus fees for my DS to attend the better comp a few miles away. It’s a school only bus so I feel confident putting him on it and yes he is thriving there, really happy. Great teaching and tons of extra curricular stuff to choose from.

My kids have done well at their comp. We are in Wales so no other option anyway really! They walk to school, have local friends, have great relationships with their teachers.

Sounds like it’s a good school that leads to a great sixth form, save the cash private school would cost and put it towards uni fees/a house deposit. And have some lovely family holidays.

Great teachers, nice friends, on target for top grades at GCSE. All at an average comp. Maybe it's their parenting haha.

Mine are thriving in average comp. Great

My kids, in a similar way to me actually, survived secondary school with average results.

We thrived - all of us - at sixth form college. That's where we started to really achieve and our careers started.

My dc are at the local comprehensive school. When dc1 started in 2017 it was Ofsted rated requires improvement and the school wasn't great although dc1 thrived there. Then they got a new head about a year later who really turned things around. Ofsted recently rated it good and dc2 and dc3 are doing very well there. All the staff are very enthusiastic with my younger dc when they come to watch school concerts etc and when my dc1 came in to visit, all the staff were really pleased to see him.

Although I have been quite negative about my DCs experience at a comp, I will say that the teachers really latch on to bright enthusiastic kids and give them lots of encouragement. Probably more so than at a school where every pupil is middle-class, bright and bushy-tailed!

DC1 is in Year 8 in a local comp. It's rated good and have better than average exam results. It's a bit run down like all state schools. But DC1 is enjoying her time at school. She's not bored or unmotivated. She's got activities after school, all outside of school.

DS went to local (but outstanding but v run down physically) comp and just dropped off at uni (Nottingham). DD at same comp and got 6 9s and 4 8s at GCSEs this summer. Younger DS started there in covid and didn't settle as all his friends went to nearer linked to primary secondary. He moved in year 7 - this school is 'good' but has amazing facilities and is brand new. If he passes enough GCSEs to be able to go to sixth form I'd be delighted.

point is kids can do well even at 'normal' comps and all kids are different. I think best thing is for kids to be happy at school - if they're not then you're facing an uphill struggle. And what makes kids happy/soar differs - for older DD and DS it was being able to study what they liked and good/nice teachers. For youngest it's being with his friends