Year 10 - 2023/2024 Support Thread

@MissyB1 its tricky because it really is intrinsic! It’s not necessarily pushy parents or a pushy school but very much themselves.

@NotDonna I know what you mean. My dh was always highly competitive at school and throughout his whole life really, but it started at senior school. He’s an absolute perfectionist and berates himself terribly if things don’t go exactly to plan. He’s very highly regarded at work- but I see the toll on his mental health. Luckily he’s aware that he must not pass that on to ds, but I do have to keep an eye out for that.

I’m not too sure how to say this nicely @QueenMabby - watch that perfectionism as their MH can take a real hit if/when something goes wrong. It’s not just girls either, I know a number of boys who are perfectionists then had a MH nose dive. Fingers crossed not your DD but just wanted to raise it. xx

oh dear @Oblomov23 is it a surprise to him too?

I've seen ds2's report. Not happy. Parents evening next week.

@DataColour my dd(14) has just started her volunteering for DoE and is helping with Rainbows. She is doing this with a friend and there are two others there also so quite a number of helpers. An interesting start though as she’s needle/blood phobic and turned up last night to find a paramedic doing a needle prick test on herself. DD had to move away quickly to avoid fainting. Hopefully that is the end of that topic rather than the start!

@QueenMabby wow your DD is seriously competitive 😁! Mine will also check her papers, especially maths, and can account for every mark lost usually. I do wonder how the actual GCSEs will feel when they will never see the papers afterwards (assuming no re marks obviously).

Hope you all enjoy your weekend.

Does anyone else find the sheer number of tests/assessments/exams excessive nowadays? Rarely a week goes past in our house without either a test or the results of a test. I feel quite sorry for the kids now.

@SuperSue77 I think I ruined litterpicking for both DDs during lockdown when I bought us all litter pickers and made them do an hour a day as part of their daily exercise as I figured we may as well do something useful. Not sure they've ever forgiven me - but it did at least feel like an accomplishment!

Ds1 wished he'd done D of E. Ds2 just did the bronze. He helped coach a group of ds3's age group at football several years ago now. I know ds3 won't be interested as he wouldn't want to go on the walks and camp, he hates flies and bugs. In the summer evenings he will walk wearing long sleeves with his hood up and holding it shut so just one eye looks out if there are bugs about 🤦‍♀️ it really winds me up, but with him I have to try to ignore it, if I say anything he won't come on walks again. Odd bod of a child I have! He's meant to be a farmers son, though dh retired from farming 5 years ago, but ds3 would definitely suit city life.

My daughter did litter picking for her Duke of Edinburgh bronze. We got some litter picking packs from the local authority and then for 13 Saturdays we went out to different areas and did some litter picking for an hour. I joined in and quite enjoyed it! Very satisfying.

@DataColour there was definitely someone on one of the Mumsnet music threads whose DS had managed to do his volunteering online for DofE - some kind of research thing - if that would be an option?

I know it's difficult. One of mine did the local library for silver and the church coffee rota for bronze. The other (for bronze) either played cello for church or did church set up- putting the chairs out - every week. The online option might be easier for an introvert I guess.

Not sure how DD2 will manage silver, which she's signed up for - she's at school 114 miles from home and every minute seems to be timetabled except the two days a week she gets to go to tesco after school before coming back to do her homework! I guess the school is used to this though so I look forward to seeing how they handle it.

She gave up scouts recently! She has expressed an interest in volunteering at the petting farm in the local park, so need to investigate. She is socially quite an introvert, doesn't like being with other people much apart from very close friends, so it's difficult for her to get into situations like volunteering to help out in group situations. She does go to bouldering and running clubs so will look into that, thanks.
DS is not that keen on DofE either, but I think his friends will be doing it so he might go along with it. Again, it's the volunteering that will be challenging to find as the skills and physical sections will be easy for him, and for DD.

Well done to your DCs @QueenMabby on the maths, that's great!

@icanbewhatiwant sounds like your DS is a perfectionist, hope he did well in his French and Business studies! Mine are happy when they do well but otherwise happy to just be average...hhhmm not sure that's the best way but that's their mind set it seems.

We had a DofE talk yesterday at school about the bronze award which they didn't do last year for some reason, so this year I think I'm signing up for both my DCs year 9 and 10. Sounds like fun. The volunteering bit sounds hard to arrange, especially for a 13yr old. The school said even cooking at home can be counted as volunteering, which I was surprised about, that's too easy isn't it?!

@QueenMabby well done to both your children - huge achievement on the maths! DD2 has her maths tests back - all more than fine - a relief given she's moved school from state to independent and wondered whether she hadn't been taught the same things. Science to go now so we had a half term of learning equations. New school really doesn't seem to test very much, which is weird as we're used to constant assessments.

@icanbewhatiwant it is really hard to find work experience if you haven't got family or friends in the right areas, which seems very unfair. The younger the child in the year the harder it is as well - DD1 was still very much 14.. Local libraries can be a good source of work experience if school isn't the best option - friends of hers very much enjoyed that one?

Lots of tests here too. They seem endless. I wish Ds wouldn't have such high expectations. He was second in his class with his chemistry test. That wasn't good enough for him. Then in the maths he only got 15 out of 20. He was really upset about it. I told him he can't be top
at everything. He had French test yesterday. Business studies tomorrow. I hope he does well for his sake.

Yes Ds has mentioned work experience. We've not had a letter about it yet. It was difficult to find stuff for ds1 and ds2. So I'm dreading it. We don't get any help from school. There isn't much locally. Ds2 ended up at the primary school that he attended. Not the best idea.

Well done to your DD!

The Dr said they had tested for all the obvious things but didn't actually show me her results. Hey ho. She decided not to do a day trip with her friends on Saturday because it had an early start and she thought she would be too tired and stressed about getting her homework done.

We had a restful half term which DD appreciated, she did loads of reading. She is finding the homework demands more than last year, especially art, but I think that is normal. She also has work experience next July which we are thinking about, just four days though. She seems to have good days and bad days but is always exhausted by the end of the week. No answers from the Drs about her fatigue/tiredness, the blood test she had just ruled some things out but no suggestions.

@DataColour Oh, the joys of work experience - I remember this from DD1 - eventually I sent her off to a financial pr firm I'd done a bit of work for. She enjoyed it but came out knowing she didn't want to work in an office. I guess that's progress (!) Architecture probably far more fun.

Not sure what happens with DD2 as she's at boarding school and its sort of semi-vocational anyway.... will see.

That sounds like a lot of testing. I guess it's good practice though as the GCSE slog is brutal.

my year 10 is still in bed. We drive her back to school on Sunday. She can't wait and I'm dreading it. She's vaguely learned her science equations for her test - emphasis on the vaguely - but mostly it's just been music practice here.

How's all the year 10s doing?

DS seem to have tests to study for most of the time, a couple of tests a week, plus lots of homework. It doesn't feel like too much to handle, but more than he's used to. It used to be that all exams where crammed into one week twice a year in year 9, but now it's when it's end of topic type thing, so a consistent trickle of them. Especially for the 3 sciences!
He's been doing well for some of them, he got 8s for Maths and English, a bit lower for the sciences and he's still got RE, Geography, another biology test and a music test next week.

We have been told to find work experience for them for next July. DH says I should take him to work but I don't think that's the best thing, to be stuck with your mum for a week! I'm in science, and I'm not sure how keen he'd be, plus there'd too much healthy and safety paperwork! I asked a friend who's an architect and it looks like that's a distinct possibility now and something that DS might enjoy.

Hope everyone's DCs are doing well.