Strict no phones rule at secondary school

I think this as well. Reasonable to not allow phones to be used at any time from arrival until they have left the school grounds.
Unreasonable to suggest that kids can't have a phone with them outside of this. They might need to go directly to an activity after school or have two homes, or whatever.
I'd be for phone in bag switched off, not taken out, and I would attempt to get the school to agree this, rather than hiding phone in lining. Y7 they might just be hiding phones, Y8/9/10, they might be sneaking all kinds of things into school so I would not encourage that idea.

Apologies then, that's just completely ridiculous. They cannot expect 11yos to be travelling to and from school without a means of communicating with their parents. What about travel passes as I said in an earlier post. I would 100% have DD hiding a phone in her bag (as I imagine at least half the school will be doing) and I'd coordinate as many parents as possible to contact the governors. Power in numbers, you can get it changed. Contact your MP even with safety concerns. If the school are that hellbent on no devices they should collect them at the door.

Well, no. I'm tracking him on the plane. I wouldn't be tracking the plane if he wasn't on it. What's the difference between tracking a plane and tracking a phone?

My kids also track ME - if they hear there's problems on the motorway they will quite often look up my location to see if I'm caught up in it, or if I'm on another route to know when I'm likely to be back (my youngest has autism and is quite anxious and it reassures her that she knows she can keep a rough idea on where I am if she needs to - I work a very large rural community area so I'm pretty all over the place), as does DH (and vice-versa) - being able to see we're heading back helps us get things like dinner going at the right time.

DD1 is very confident and also quite able to solve problems herself - but DD2 has a range of SEN, although none are of the level where mainstream is not the right place for her educationally - it's going to be important when she starts secondary that she has a phone on her for the start and the end of the day so that we can do things like set reminders for where she needs to be, and arrange meeting points to collect at the end of the day. At the moment we're teaching her to use her phone to slightly support her lack of executive function and attention (she has inattentive ADHD among other issues) in terms of lists, reminders, schedules etc - and I'd be bloody pissed off if school decided that they wanted to remove that completely, especially since we've also put a lot of time into appropriate phone use and when to turn it off (and her other issues mean that she is one who will stick to those rules rigidly). It's one factor in terms of the schools we're looking at for secondary for her and her sibling - ones that are not totally OTT in terms of the rules they take pleasure in imposing on the kids (one of our local secondaries very much IS and delights in being in the local paper for sending home half the kids every start of September when they've randomly changed uniform rules at last minute - and we are steering well fucking clear of that, once outstanding and now sliding meteorically - in the manner of a meteor descending to Earth - down the Ofsted ratings).

I think a lot of posters are misunderstanding this. Most parents aren't sitting there obsessively checking on their dc whereabouts. I barely check my dcs. On some occasions it's useful though. For example, the other day my dcs school phoned me to say dc hadnt come in. It was actually just an admin error by the school but I was able to check the location which was useful.

@Calloffruity "
Where do you stand on tracking flights out of interest? If DH goes abroad with work and I'm not otherwise busy I'll track his plane on flight radar and I know when he's landed. Is that an invasion of his privacy?"

Well, no. Because you're tracking the plane he's probably on. Not him. I don't understand why this stuff is so hard!

The Hollie Guard

www.itv.com/news/westcountry/2021-10-05/safety-app-made-in-memory-of-murdered-hairdresser-sees-surge-in-demand

Created by the parents of a young woman tragically murdered by her ex partner. It's designed to notify your emergency contacts if you are in danger and your whereabouts, essentially tracking and communicating your location. There is demand and need for such apps amongst adults, sadly. Is it such a leap that similar precautions are a good idea for children? I'm not necessarily in agreement kids should be actively tracked by their parents, but I do agree if something unexpected happens parents should be able to check their location. Surely badgering a teenager with "are you ok" "where are you" texts is worse/will annoy them/lose their trust even more!

Where do you stand on tracking flights out of interest? If DH goes abroad with work and I'm not otherwise busy I'll track his plane on flight radar and I know when he's landed. Is that an invasion of his privacy?

How does everyone else cope?

Yes-texting when you get home. Or texting when you're on the way home. Texting if you're going to be late. All perfectly fine. And NOT TRACKING!!!!!!

@MargaretThursday same - I text my parents if we've made a long journey somewhere to let them know we arrived safely, and they do the same. My MIL also messages DH after she's made a lengthy drive so I know it's normal and not just my family. We're all adults and it's nothing to do with trust, it's just a nice/considerate thing you do with family.

It's not saying you don't trust them; it's saying that when they're late out of school because they couldn't find their gym bag, or there's an accident reported outside school you can relieve your worries.
I don't think mine ever took me asking them to text me to say when they were coming home as a lack of trust. In some ways it made them feel more relaxed because if they were late out of school they didn't have to hurry, they knew that I would know.

A bit like when I come back from holiday I send a text to Mum to say all back. I know she trusts me, she just likes to know we're safely home.

The idea of people cutting contact with their parents because they were tracked as a child has really tickled me 😂 one could just as easily put across the opposite - people cutting contact with their parents because they didn't track them as a child and they've realised their parents didn't care very much about their safety 😂

Many children have travel passes on their phones, which work out cheaper than paying daily. I'd say that's a damn good reason to allow a phone, unless the school were willing to make up the difference.

This would never happen though - the OP has obviously misunderstood the rule and it's just the same as a lot of other schools, phones off and out of sight on the premises. DD fell foul to this at the start of y7 - she was walking into school with the phone switched off, but still in her hand. She was told off and knows now it needs to be away in her bag before she goes onto the school grounds.

What I did for my dcs when they were walking to junior school, was undo the lining in their school bag, put a cheap mobile into the lining and sew it up with very loose stitches that they could easily break and get it out if necessary.
I did that because dd1 hates breaking the rules.
They used it between them 3-4 times, but each time it was really good they had it.

I like that their secondary is happy to have phones as it makes life much easier, and my dc have never had any mobile issues because the school comes down hard on anyone who does try anything.

So. Mountain biking accident. Apart from that- has there been an example where tracking did a job texting couldn't? Except the honest poster who said she was entitled to know where her children are at all times?

I am absolutely fine with you not agreeing with tracking but we had a mountain biking accident and what3words would just not have cut it. So I am keeping it on.
Do you know of people who have cut contact with their parents because they used Find My iPhone ? Are there actual statistics on this?

So what do you think about setting parental controls on a phone so they can't access certain websites. Is that an invasion of their privacy? Should we just trust our kids to not access certain content?

I don't understand your question? Putting parental controls on a phone is not invading privacy in any way, shape or form.

@Comedycook "So what do you think about setting parental controls on a phone so they can't access certain websites. Is that an invasion of their privacy? Should we just trust our kids to not access certain content?"

That is pretty classic whataboutery, to be honest! There is a big difference between not wanting your child to access porn on their phones (good luck with that, by the way-I'd go for open and honest discussion about what's good for them/other people/society personally so that if/when they come up against something vile they are at least a bit equipped) and not thinking routinely tracking children is a good idea.

So what do you think about setting parental controls on a phone so they can't access certain websites. Is that an invasion of their privacy? Should we just trust our kids to not access certain content?

Depends how much they need the phone for the journey home doesn’t it. And how often people’s phones go off in class prompting a bag search. Might be daft to hide the phone, might not…

I've read the whole thread and the only example I agree that tracking was useful was the SEN child who panicked when they got lost and would not have been able to find their way back without.

1. I know where my child is by the simple expedient of asking them. There are very few occasions where I need to know more accurately than "at the park". If they are somewhere they don't want me to know, they are clever enough just to ditch their phone. Now I have no way of contacting them.
2. If my child gets lost and can't find their way back by using Google maps/their own initiative (assuming no SEN) then they probably shouldn't be out on their own.
3. If your child falls off their bike in the woods when mountain biking you can use what3words to locate them
4. If your child is bundled into a van by a faceless abductor, then surely the first rule of abductor training is to throw the phone/tracker out of the window?
5. I'm glad that some people don't care that their young teens know that they are not trusted by their parents. I assume you also don't care when your young teens grow up and are not interested in having a relationship with you as an adult?

I'm quite happy to tell my children I think a rule is daft. But I'd have to have a damn good reason to tell them it was OK to break it. And the idea of encouraging them to hide a phone in the lining of a bag is seriously ridiculous. Apart from anything else, people obviously have greater faith in the ability of the average 11 year old to keep their mouth shut.

I'd quite happily tell my child that a rule was stupid if it was stupid and help them break it if necessary. We're not sheep and teachers aren't gods.

It's a moot point though because no school is going to ban children from travelling with a phone, just the use of it on site.